U2 Jokes

by | Feb 19, 2026 | Latest News, music, School Jokes

My Town Tutors is a great resource for parents & teachers. Check out our Guest Blogs for Education, Parents, Travel, Tutoring, Sports, Music and College.

Google Search “U2 Jokes”

  1. Knock knock?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best U2 jokes.
  2. Bono and The Edge walk into a bar … Bartender says “not U2 again!”
  3. Doctor Jokes: Bono returns to the doctor for a checkup after his back surgery. The doctor asks… “Is it getting better? Or do you feel the same?”
  4. Bono from U2 is the voice of my car’s GPS. It sucks…. The streets have no names and I still haven’t found what I’m looking for.
  5. Good Friday Jokes: Good Friday (April 3rd, 2026)… was a GREAT Friday for U2 fans with the release of the Easter Lilly EP.
  6. I met U2 once.. I stood very close to the Edge.  
  7. Did you know Stevie Nicks, with the help of Tom Petty, wrote a song about the U2 guitarist’s teen years?… Edge of Seventeen.
  8. Lawyer Jokes: I’ve heard that U2 has never paid any legal fees… Their lawyers all work pro-Bono.   
  9. Why doesn’t Bono like Google?… He still hasn’t found what he’s looking for.
  10. We hope our U2 jokes will get the band members Dublin over with laughter
  11. Easter Jokes: What is the favorite U2 album for a florist?… Easter Lily.
  12. Ash Wednesday Jokes: On February 18th, 2026 U2 released “Days of Ash.”… Is this the unofficial or official EP of Ash Wednesday?
  13. Grandparent Jokes: What U2 song reminds me of my Nana‘s cooking?… Seconds.
  14. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Irish… Irish who?… Irish we have the #1 page for U2 jokes!
  15. St. Patrick’s Day Jokes: Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Irish… Irish who?… Irish I could have seen the U2 St. Patrick’s Day concert in Boston on March 17, 1992.
  16. Easter Jokes: Easter 2026… a GREAT Easter for U2 fans with the release of the Easter Lilly EP.
  17. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe tell me the name of the song on the Easter Lily EP where the Edge sings?… Song for Hall.
  18. Ash Wednesday Jokes: Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe, who?… Canoe believe U2 released on February 18th, 2026 “Days of Ash” U2 SURPRISE-DROP POLITICALLY CHARGED ‘DAYS OF ASH’ EP WITH SIX NEW SONGS?
  20. St. Patrick’s Day Jokes: Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Irish… Irish who?… Irish I could have seen the U2 on May 5, 1983 & May 6, 1983 at the Orpheum Theatre. The Alarm was the opening act.
  21. Christmas Jokes: Did anyone get a U2 Satellite Navigation System for Christmas?… I am returning my one, The Streets have No Name. And I Still Haven’t Found What I am Looking For.    
  22. Cemetery Jokes: U2 song American obituary… deadly! (U2’s “American Obituary” (2026) is a protest song and lament from their Days of Ash EP, honoring Renee Good, a Minneapolis mother killed by an ICE agent.)
  23. Ash Wednesday Jokes: U2 released on February 18th, 2026 “Days of Ash.”… Is this the unofficial or official song of Ash Wednesday?
  24. I was U2’s bass player in their early days. One night I shoved Bono into our guitar player while he was doing a solo, and after tumbling over him, he got up and stabbed me with his pocketknife. I thought that was a bit extreme, but guess I shouldn’t have pushed him over The Edge. 
  25. Walking Jokes: U2’s song Walk to Water… a great song for a National Walking Day playlist.
  26. I Will Follow… the unofficial song of Follow the Leader.
  27. What is a zookeeper‘s favorite U2 song?… Zoo Station.
  28. Doctor Jokes: What is an anesthesiologist favorite U2 song?… Numb.
  29. Pope Jokes: What U2 song is on the Pope’s playlist?… The Miracle (of Joey Ramone.)
  30. Why are they called U2?… Because everyone knows it’s Bono, the Edge and…er…you two.
  31. I saw U2 three times during the Joshua Tree tour… Irish I saw them more.
  32. What is the Invisible Man’s favorite U2 song?… Invisible.
  33. What is the Invisible Woman’s favorite U2 song?… Invisible.
  34. What U2 song is on a magicians playlist?… Mysterious Ways
  35. Geology Jokes: Who is a geologist’s favorite U2 DJ?… “Rocky” O’Riordan.
  36. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Irish… Irish, who?… Irish I could have seen U2 performance at Live Aid at Wembley Stadium.
  37. Homecoming Jokes: What U2 band member should you never ask to the homecoming dance?… BoNO!
  38. U2 Jokes:
  39. Who is an American Football defensive end’s favorite member of you too?… The Edge.
  40. Homecoming Jokes: What U2 song should be on every homecoming playlist?… A Sort of Homecoming.
  41. Who is the American Footbal defensive coordinator’s favorite U2 member?… The Edge.
  42. U2’s song Bad… it’s so good!
  43. Movie Jokes: The band U2 went to the premiere of the new Mr. Rogers film… …because it’s a Beautiful Day in the neighborhood.      
  44. U2’s performance of Bad at Live Aid… was so good.
  45. Geology Jokes: Where is the geologist favorite place to see U2?… Red Rocks.
  46. What U2 song goes nice with a piece of fish and a glass of Chardonnay?… Lemon.
  47. Solar Eclipse Jokes: U2’s song Staring at the Sun… a must for every Eclipse Playlist.
  48. Lawyer Jokes: My lawyer dumped me after I said I hated U2…. He was working under a Pro Bono agreement.     
  49. U2 is the most beloved band. Every time someone hears “I love you” they reply “I love U2.”      
  50. Lawyer Jokes: Did you hear that the band U2 gave away a free concert?… Apparently, the crowd was very Pro Bono.     
  51. I got a U2 monopoly but it sucked because the streets have no name.
  52. Why did Bono fall off stage?… He stood too close to the Edge.
  53. Lawyer Jokes: My lawyer is a U2 fan… So he was glad to represent them in a court case pro Bono.
  54. Lawyer Jokes: Having U2 as a client would be the worst… All the work is pro bono.      
  55. Lawyer Jokes: My friend who absolutely loves U2 just passed the BAR exam… He says everything he does now will be Pro Bono.      
  56. How does Bono spell color?… With or without “u”
  57. Why does Bono sing acapella when hes feeling down?… It takes the edge off it.
  58. The U2 spy plane took many pictures during its military career… But it still hasn’t found what it’s looking for.      
  59. Lawyer Jokes: Did you hear about the lawyer who refused to represent U2 in court?… He didn’t want to work pro-Bono.   
  60. U2 Jokes:
  61. My friend and I were backstage with band U2 and two other people. I said “Hey look, I’m here with U2, you two, and you too!”      
  62. U2 just announced a world tour. Are they going to sell tickets, or just break into my living room and start playing?      
  63. How does U2 spell color/colour?… With or Without U.    
  64. I learned that Bono from U2 holds the record for most private investigators hired to recover a lost heirloom… To this day he still hasn’t found what he’s looking for.      
  65. I bought a new sat nav made by the band U2, bloody things useless. The streets have no names.     
  66. Lawyer Jokes: I was going to sue U2 for stealing one of my songs But I found out my lawyer was pro-bono.      
  67. Lawyer Jokes: I don’t get why all these people praise lawyers just for being U2 fans… Suddenly they’re special for taking on Pro-Bono cases?      
  68. Lawyer Jokes: What was U2’s lawyer’s hourly rate?… Nothing, he was pro-Bono      
  69. Lawyer Jokes: Lawyers must be pretty big fans of the legendary Irish rock band U2… Almost all of them go on about all the pro-Bono things that they do.      
  70. You guys hear that Bono fell off the stage at the big U2 concert last night?… He got a little too close to the edge.      
  71. If the FBI needs to get into someones’s iPhone without permission. They should just call U2 and ask how they did it.      
  72. Lawyer Jokes: U2 got sued over copyright and didn’t have money to afford a lawyer. The ACLU stepped in for free and they won the case. It was pro Bono.      
  73. I told my girl I love you. She said I love U2. That was kind of depressing. She’s talking about music at this vulnerable moment. So I broke up with her.      
  74.  Why does Bono always say ‘I love you’ first?… Because it’s the only time he gets to hear someone say: I love U2      
  75. Lawyer Jokes: I tried to get a lawyer pro bono but found it impossible… Every one I contacted hated U2.    
  76. I just recieved the worst gift of all time… .. A Bonnie Tyler sat nav. Keeps on telling me to “turn around” And every now and then it falls apart. Still, not as bad as the U2 one, where the streets have no names, and I still haven’t found what I’m looking for.      
  77. When my friend turned 40 I sent him a CD in the mail, UB40 A month later on my 40th I received a CD in the mail from him, U2      
  78. What did Bono say when he called his kids for dinner and they didn’t come?… “I still haven’t found who I’m cooking for!”
  79. What do you call a quartet of sheep that play post punk music?… Ewe2.
  80. Lawyer Jokes: A British songwriter is suing U2, claiming that the band stole one of his songs. Though I don’t like the songwriter’s chances, because his lawyer is working Pro Bono. 
  81. “Every time I clap my hands, a child in Africa dies of starvation.” Fan in the crowd: “for bloody sakes then, stop clapping your hands!!!
  82. Lawyer Jokes: What kind of lawyers praise U2?… Pro Bono lawyers.
  83. Bono from U2 says he’s given up on alternative search engines like Bing and will just use google from now on… He still hasn’t found what he’s looking for
  84. U2 are one of Ireland’s most successful bands. Or according to their tax returns, one of Netherlands’ least successful hardware store owners.     
  85. Why is there echo every time Bono sings?… Because he’s close to The Edge.
  86. What do you call Bono’s stupid brother?… Duno…
  87. Why is U-2’s lawyer always broke?… All of his cases are pro-Bono.
  88. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name the singer for U2?
  89. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name the drummer for U2?
  90. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name the bass player for U2?
  91. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name the guitarist for U2?
  92. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe believe we have 100 U2 Jokes?
  93. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe believe we have 101 U2 Jokes?
  94. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name the member of U2?
  95. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name the #1 U2 Song?
  96. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe tell me about the U2 Live Aid performance?
  97. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe believe how many great albums U2 has?
  98. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe believe how many great songs U2 has?
  99. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe believe how many good U2 is in concert?
  100. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe believe U2 has been great for so many decades?
  101. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe believe how good the U2 Joshua album is?
  102. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe believe U2 is working on a new album?
  103. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe believe U2 peformed for President Obama at the Lincoln Memorial?