American Revolutionary War Jokes

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American Revolution Knock Knock Jokes: Knock knock?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best American Revolution jokes.
Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Nota… Nota who?… Not America because freedom rings!
American Revolution Knock Knock Jokes: How come there’s no Knock Knock jokes about America?… Because freedom rings.
Tea Jokes: What kind of tea did the American colonists thirst for?… Liberty!
Tea Jokes: America: Hey England, Happy Fourh of July! England: Where’s the T? America: Threw it in the Boston Harbor!
Teacher: “More than 250 years ago, our forefathers defeated the British in the Revolutionary War.”… Student: “Wow! They must have been pretty strong, four men defeating a whole army!”
Paul Revere and his late night ride with his horse… A night mare for King George III and the British.
What dance was very popular in 1776?… Indepen-dance!
What was the Patriots’ favorite food in the Revolutionary War? … Chicken Catch-a-Tory!
Tea Jokes: The Boston Tea Party was on December 16, 1773. It must have been cold… Was that the 1st time there was Iced Tea?
Army Jokes: What was General Washington’s favorite tree?… The infan-tree.
Ghost Jokes: What ghost haunted King George III?… The spirit of ‘76!
Geography Jokes: What is a geography teacher’s favorite site on the Freedom Trail?… The Old NORTH Church.
Flag Day Jokes: Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name how many stars are in the original United States flag? (13)
What did King George think of the American colonists?… He thought they were revolting!
Pennsylvania Jokes: The Philadelphia 76ers, The New England Revolution, The New England Patriots… The official sports teams of the American Revolution.
4th of July Quiz: Do they have a 4th of July in England?… Of course. That’s how they get from the 3rd to the 5th.
Tea Jokes: What did the colonists wear to the Boston Tea Party?…Tea-shirts.
Tea Jokes: What do you call a Boston Tea Party joke?… A brew-ha-ha!
What do you call a patriot who’s always on time?… A minute man.
Pennsylvania Jokes: Did you hear the joke about the Liberty Bell?… Yeah, it cracked me up!
Geography Jokes: What is a geography teacher’s favorite spot in Concord, Massachusetts and site of a famous battle during the Revolutionary War?… The Old NORTH Bridge.
How did American colonists’ dogs protest against England?… The Boston Flea Party.
Army Jokes: Where did General Washington put his armies?… In his sleevies!
What happened as a result of the Stamp Act?… The Americans licked the British.
Tea Jokes: British people say that we as Americans go overboard with the 4th of July…. When really the only thing that went overboard was their tea.
What did Samuel Adams say to his beer?… You’re the ‘ale’-iance we need.
Doctor Jokes: Why did John Adams go to the doctor?… He had a bad case of independence-itis.
Army Jokes: Who was the biggest jokester in George Washington’s army?… Laughayette.
Father William, the old priest, made it a practice to visit the parish school one day a week. He walked into the 4th grade class, where the children were studying the states, and asked them how many states they could name. They came up with about 40 names. Father William jokingly told them that in his day students knew the names of all the states. One lad raised his hand and said, Yes sir, but in those days there were only 13 states.
Art Jokes: What do you call an AWESOME American Revolution drawing by a child?… A Yankee Doodle Dandy!
Tea Jokes: Why was the Boston Tea Party so popular?… Because it was steeped in history!
Flag Day Jokes: Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name the person who designed the 1st American Flag! (Betsy Ross)
Tea Jokes: Why did the British soldiers go to therapy?… They couldn’t handle the constant “tea”-sing from the American patriots!
Flag Day Jokes: Which flag is the most highly rated?… The American flag. It has 50 stars!
4th of July Jokes: The Fourth of July weekend was coming up, and the nursery school teacher took the opportunity to tell her class about patriotism. “We live in a great country,” she said. “One of the things we should be happy about is that, in this country, we are all free.” One little boy came walking up to her from the back of the room. He stood with his hands on his hips and said. . . .“I’m not free. I’m four.”
What was Thomas Jefferson’s favorite dessert?… Monti jello.
What is the weight of freedom?… A washing-ton.
Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?… On the bottom!
Why did the colonists love gardening?… They were always planting seeds of rebellion!
Ocean Jokes: Why did the British cross the Atlantic in the 1770s?… To get to the other tide!
Patriots Day Jokes: Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe, who?… Canoe you name the Massachusetts holiday that celebrates the Battle of Lexington & Concord?
Why were the first Americans like ants?… They lived in colonies.
Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name the 1st person to sign the Declaration of Independence! (John Hancock)
What did Benjamin Franklin say when he invented bifocals?… Now I can see both sides of the argument!
What did a patriot put on his dry skin?… Revo-lotion!
Star Wars Jokes: What did Luke Skywalker say on Independence Day?… May the Fourth be with!
4th of July Jokes: Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Ray… Ray who?… Raymember the founding father’s on Independence Day!
Army Jokes: Why was George Washington such a good general?… He never lost his head in battle—literally or figuratively!
Fireworks Jokes: Who has to work on the 4th of July?… Fire works.
How did Benjamin Franklin feel about electricity?… Shocked, but positively charged!
Tea Jokes: What’s the most patriotic drink?… Liber-tea, of course.
Tea Jokes: What kind of tea did the colonists throw into Boston Harbor?… Liberty tea!
Dog Jokes: Which Founding Father is a dog’s favorite?… Bone Franklin.
Pencil Jokes: Why did the patriots always carry a pencil?… They wanted to draw their own conclusions!
4th of July Jokes: It’s July 4th… Happy Ind -pun- dance Day!
Teacher: “How did the Founding Fathers decide on our country’s flag?” Student: “I guess they took a flag poll!”
Patriots Day Jokes: Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe, who?… Canoe you name the Massachusetts holiday that coincides with the Boston Marathon? (Patriots Day)
Pencil Jokes: Why did the colonists always carry a pencil?… They wanted to draw their own conclusions!
Christmas Jokes: Which famous person do you get when you make a wreath out of $100 bills?… Aretha Franklin.
What sport is played on Independence Day?… American Flag Football.
4th of July Jokes: On July 4th, what did the ghost say?… Red, white, and boo!
Ocean Jokes: Why did the colonists go to the ocean?… To sea freedom.
4th of July Jokes: Do you love Inde – pun – dance day puns?
Pennsylvania Jokes: I tried to make a joke about the Liberty Bell… but it cracked up.
Tea Jokes: What did one colonist say to the other during the Boston Tea Party?… “This is steep!”
What are the most patriotic flowers?… Yankee Doodle Dandylions.
Pennsylvania Jokes: Which colonists told the most jokes?… Punsylvanians!
“If our Founding Fathers wanted us to care about the rest of the world, they wouldn’t have declared their independence from it.” Stephen Colbert
Cat Jokes: What cat said, “The British are coming! The British are coming!”?… Paw Revere.
Constitution Jokes: How is a person who never gets sick like the United States of America?… They both have great constitutions.
Constitution Jokes: When we had a school trip to an aviary on Independence Day, we noticed that the ducks were given a certain inalienable right. Turns out, they had a duck-leration of independence.
Tea Jokes: What protest by a group of dogs occurred in 1772?… The Boston Flea Party.
Tea Jokes: The Boston Tea Party was a real brew-ha-ha!
Massachusetts Jokes: How do you describe a Massachusetts historian?… Someone who always “Mass-ters” the subject!
Skeleton Jokes: Why didn’t the skeleton fight in the American Revolution?… Because he didn’t have the guts!
Tea Jokes: Why did the colonists throw tea in the harbor?… Because it was brew-tal taxation!
Tea Jokes: Which letter is the coolest every 4th of July?… An Iced T.
Fireworks Jokes: What is Uncle Sam’s favorite snack?… Fire crackers.
Music Jokes: What march would you play at a jungle parade?… “Tarzan Stripes Forever!”
Why did Benjamin Franklin feel shocked when he discovered electricity?… He had a real “current” event!
What was the most popular dance move in the colonies in 1776?… The Indepen-dance!
Massachusetts Jokes: The history teacher in Massachusetts said his lessons were Revolutionary!
Tea Jokes: Why was tea so important to the American Revolution?… Because it brewed up some serious change!
Did you hear about the artist in the Continental Army?… He was a Yankee doodler.
How did the colonists react when they heard about the Stamp Act?… They licked it off and sent it back to England!
Teacher: “Which son of old Virginia wrote the Declaration of Independence?” Student: “I think it was Thomas Jeffer’s son.”
Grandparent Jokes: My great, great, great grandfather was a soldier and a patriot and in order to treat his wounds and scars he used revo-lotion.
Tea Jokes: What did King George think of the Boston Tea Party?… He thought it was just a “tea-rrible” idea!
What quacks, has webbed feet, and betrays his country?… Beneduck Arnold.
How did Benjamin Franklin feel about discovering electricity?… Shocked, of course!
Army Jokes: Why did the American soldiers bring their own snacks to battle during the American Revolution?… Because they didn’t want to go “continental” breakfast!
World’s Best Basketball Jokes: The Philadelphia 76ers… The official NBA basketball team of the American Revolution.
King Jokes: Why did the Sons of Liberty hate playing cards during the American Revolution?… Because every time they saw a King or a Queen, it reminded them of taxation without representation.
Teacher: “Who wrote: Oh say, can you see?” Student: “An eye doctor?” (Top Teacher Jokes)
Flag Day Jokes: Why did the American flag break up with the British flag?… It felt like they were just going in circles.
How did the Founding Fathers stay cool?… They always kept their ideas in the shade of liberty!
Flag Day Jokes: What did the flag say to the pole?… “You’re a real stand-up guy!”
What was all the rage at the Colonists’ Cotillion of 1776?… Doing the Indepen-dance.
What did the Patriots say to the British?… “You’re taxing our patience!”
Vermont Jokes: Why did the American colonists go to the Vermont mountains?… To have a peak performance.
Constitution Jokes: What did the Constitution say to the Bill of Rights?… “You complete me!”
Why did George Washington have trouble sleeping?… Because he couldn’t lie!
Pennsylvania Jokes: Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?… At the bottom!
What’s the difference between a duck and George Washington?… One has a bill on his face; the other has his face on a bill!
Flag Day Jokes: What did one flag say to another during the Revolution?… “Let’s wave goodbye to tyranny!”
“It is assuredly better to go laughing than crying thro’ the rough journey of life.” George Washington
Pennsylvania Jokes: What did the Liberty Bell say to the British?… You can’t bell-ieve we’re free.
“As I have heard since my arrival at this place, a circumstantial account of my death and dying speech, I take this early opportunity of contradicting the first, and of assuring you, that I have not as yet composed the latter.” George Washington
Pennsylvania Jokes: A little boy just couldn’t learn. One day his teacher asked him who signed the Declaration of Independence. He didn’t know. For almost a week she asked him the same question every day, but still he couldn’t come up with the right answer. Finally, in desperation, she called the boy’s father to her office. “Your boy won’t tell me who signed the Declaration of Independence,” she complained. “Come here, son, and sit down,” the dad said to the boy. “Now if you signed that crazy thing, just admit it so we can get out of here!” (Top Teacher Jokes)
Massachusetts Jokes: Why was the Minuteman always calm under pressure?… He knew how to take things one “minute” at a time!
Fireworks Jokes: Why don’t firefighters get the Fourth of July off?… Because fire works.
Great American Political Book Never Written: “How to Become President” by Paul O’Ticks. (Top Presidents’ Day Jokes)
What do you call a person who can’t get enough of American Revolution history?… A Revoluti-nut!
Massachusetts Jokes: The New England Revolution:.. The official MLS Soccer team of the American Revolution.
Massachusetts Jokes: The New England Patriots… The official NFL team of the American Revolution.
Barber Jokes: Why did the firecracker go to the hair salon?… It needed to trim its bangs.
Tea Jokes: What did they serve at the Boston Tea Party after all that throwing?… A refreshing cup of freedom!
Dad Jokes: What treat do dads like on the 4th of July?… POPsicles.
What’s the official snack of the Declaration of Independence?… Poppycorn.
What would you get if you crossed Washington’s home with nasty insects?… Mt. Vermin!
Why does Uncle Sam wear red, white and blue suspenders?… To hold up his pants.
Tea Jokes: What did the British soldiers say when they lost the war?… “This is just tea-rrible!”
What was all the rage at the Colonists’ Cotillion of 1776?… Doing the Indepen-dance.
What quacks, has a bill and shouldn’t be trusted?… Beneduck Arnold.
Tea Jokes: How did the British respond to the American Revolution?… With tea-rritory loss!
Why did the American colonists always bring a ladder to the revolution?… Because they wanted to rise to the occasion!
Pennsylvania Jokes: Which American colonists told the most riddles?… Puns-ylvanians.
4th of July Jokes: What is the best sport to play on July 4th?… Flag football.
Psychology Jokes: Why did King George III go to therapy?… He had a tax-ing problem.
4th of July Jokes: Since it’s the Fourth of July… let’s indepen-dance the night away!
What did the American colonists say to British soldiers during the American Revolution?… We’re revolting!
Grandparent Jokes: My great-grandfather fought with Napoleon, my grandfather fought with the French and my father fought with the Americans…. Your relatives couldn’t get along with anyone, could they?
Delaware Jokes: What did George Washington say to his men before they crossed the Delaware?…”Get in the boat, men!”
What rooster signed the Declaration of Independence first?… John Hancock-a-doodle-doo.
Psychology Jokes: Why did the liberty bell go to therapy?… Because it had some serious cracks in its life!
George Washington never told a lie… except about how bad the winter at Valley Forge was.
Massachusetts Jokes: What was the craziest battle of the Revolutionary War?… The Battle of Bonkers Hill.
Pennsylvania Jokes: What’s big, cracked, and carries your luggage?… The Liberty Bellhop!
Tea Jokes: What did the American colonists say to the British tea?… Leaf us alone.
Why did the American Revolution soldiers only fight in open fields?… Because they didn’t want to be “corn-nered” by the British!
Army Jokes: What are the two main rules in the Army?… 1. The commanding officer is always right. 2. If the commanding officer is not right, see #1
What do you call an American revolutionary who draws cartoons?… Yankee Doodler.
Massachusetts Jokes: Why did the minute men bring their watches to battle?… So they could be on time for freedom!
Pennsylvania Jokes: Why were the first Pennsylvania settlers like ants?… Because they lived in colonies.
Tea Jokes: Why did the colonists refuse to drink British tea?… They found it too taxing!
Pennsylvania Jokes: What famous pig signed the Declaration of Independence?… John Hamcock!
4th of July Jokes: Why shouldn’t there be knock-knock jokes on the 4th of July?… Because freedom rings.
4th of July Jokes: How did the unexpected guest greet his grilling host at the July 4th barbeque?… “Fancy meat-ing you here.”
What gives birds certain inalienable rights?… The Ducklaration of Independence.
Where did George Washington buy his hatchet?… At the chopping mall.
Army Jokes: Why did George Washington’s troops go to the forest?… To have a tree-mendous victory.
Music Jokes: Who loves singing the patriotic song that starts with, “Oh say, can you see?”… An optometrist
Pennsylvania Jokes: Teacher: True or False? The Declaration of Independence was written in Philadelphia. Student: False. It was written in ink. (Top Teacher Jokes
Flag Day Jokes: Why did the American flag go to school?… To show its true colors!
Tea Jokes: Why did the colonists wear tea-shirts to the Boston Tea Party?… Because they wanted to make a “brew-tiful” statement!
4th of July Jokes: What do you call a snowman on the 4th of July?… A puddle.
4th of July Jokes: Food, Family, Fourth of July, and Fireworks… The four best F words ever!
Pennsylvania Jokes: Who gave the Liberty Bell to Philadelphia?… A duck family, Because it had a qwack in it!
Cheese Jokes: How do you know if a burger is patriotic?… It’s got that American cheese!
Tea Jokes: What kind of tea did the American colonists really want?… Liberty.
Why was King George III so bad at math?… Because he couldn’t count on his colonies!
Why did King George III bring a ladder to the battle?… He wanted to take a high ground.
Tea Jokes: What do you call a tea party that turns into a revolution?… A brew-ha-ha!
Why did Benjamin Franklin go to the post office?… To send a revolution-ary letter.
Pennsylvania Jokes: How did Thomas Jefferson feel after writing the Declaration of Independence?… Like he’d penned his best work.
Massachusetts Jokes: What did Paul Revere say to his fellow riders?… Let’s horse around.
4th of July Jokes: Why did the hot dog go to the 4th of July party?… Because it heard it was buns of fun.
Tea Jokes: Why did the colonists throw tea into the harbor?… Because they wanted to steep their independence!
Music Jokes: What’s the American Revolution’s favorite type of music?… Rock and roll—it was all about breaking free!
Army Jokes: Why did the Continental Army excel at math?… They knew how to handle their “revolutions!”
4th of July Jokes: What’s the favorite type of exercise on the Fourth of July?… The Freedom Run—everyone loves to celebrate by running away from the British!
Pennsylvania Jokes: The British didn’t expect the revolution to go viral… they should’ve read the Declaration of Independence’s terms and conditions.
What would you get if you crossed George Washington with cattle feed?… The Fodder of Our Country!
Tea Jokes: What did one tea bag say to another during the protest?… “Let’s steep this thing up!”
How is the American flag like Santa Claus?… They both hang out at the pole! (Christmas Trivia & Christmas Jokes)
Pennsylvania Jokes: Why is the Liberty Bell like a dropped Easter egg?… They’re both cracked. (Top 10 Easter Jokes)
Tea Jokes: Why was everyone so excited about the Boston Tea Party?… It was the original “tea-rrific” event!
Why was eagle hunting prohibited in America?… Because it was ill-eagle.
Dog Jokes: What do you get if you cross a patriotic American with a small curly-haired dog?… Yankee Poodle.
Massachusetts Jokes: What did Paul Revere say to his horse?… Giddyup, we have a revolution to start.
Why did George Washington’s troops go to the party?… To have a revolution-ary time.
Massachusetts Jokes: Why did Paul Revere ride at midnight?… He wanted to avoid the morning rush hour!
Massachusetts Jokes: What did the Revolutionary leader say at the meeting?… “Let’s ‘concord’ our differences and move forward!”
Pennsylvania Jokes: Why did Thomas Jefferson bring a pillow to the Continental Congress?… He wanted to have a soft declaration.
Barber Jokes: What would you get if you crossed a colonial hairpiece with a teepee?… A powdered wigwam!
Tea Jokes: The American Revolution wasn’t just about freedom… it was also a major tea spill.
Flag Day Jokes: Why did the American flag go to school?… To get its stripes in history.
The World’s Best Basketball Jokes: Why was the American Revolution like a basketball game?… Because the Americans were always “shooting” for independence!
4th of July Jokes: What do you eat on the 5th of July?… Independence Day old macaroni salad.
Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?… Right at the bottom of the page.
What would you get if you crossed the American national bird with Snoopy?… A bald beagle!.
Flag Day Jokes: What did one American flag say to the other flag?….. Nothing. It just waved!
Why did Benjamin Franklin fly his kite?… To get a shocking view of the British.
Tea Jokes: How did the colonists celebrate after the Boston Tea Party?… With a big “brew-haha” bash!
Flag Day Jokes: Which flag has the highest Yelp rating?… The U.S. flag. It has 50 stars!
Massachusetts Jokes: Paul Revere’s horse was always ahead of the curve… He knew when to hoof it.
Christmas Jokes: What has four legs, a shiny nose, and fought for England?… Rudolph the Redcoat Reindeer!
Dog Jokes: What do you get when you cross a patriot with a dog?… A Yankee doodle dandy!
Delaware Jokes: What did George Washington say when crossing the Delaware?… “Row, row, row your boat… quietly.”
Massachusetts Jokes: How did the Massachusetts colonists stay warm during winter?… They had a lot of “Mass” appeal with their cozy blankets!
Massachusetts Jokes: What did Paul Revere say at the Boston Tea Party?… “The British are coming, and they’re bringing crumpets!”
Massachusetts Jokes: Why did Paul Revere ride his horse from Boston to Lexington?… Because the horse was too heavy to carry!
Massachusetts Jokes: What do you call a well-informed Massachusetts resident?… A Mass-ive history buff!
Fireworks Jokes: What did the little firecracker say to the big firecracker?… Hi, Pop!
Tea Jokes: What do you call a revolution where everyone brings their own tea bags?… A brew-haha!
Tea Jokes: What’s a revolutionary’s favorite drink?… Tea with a side of liberty!
Flag Day Jokes: What’s red, white and blue?… Our flag, of course. And a sad candy cane!
What’s red, white, black and blue?… Uncle Sam after a boxing match.
Fireworks Jokes: What should people never eat on July 4th?… Fire crackers.
Flag Day Jokes: What do the American flag and a sad candy cane have in common?… They’re both red, white and blue.
What’s red, white, blue and a little green?… Uncle Sam when he’s sea sick.
Flag Day Jokes: Why did the American flag go to the doctor?… Because it had a few stripes.
What’s red, white, blue, and green?… A patriotic turtle!
Massachusetts Jokes: What did Paul Revere say at the end of his historic ride?… I’ve got to get a softer saddle!
Fireworks Jokes: What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?… A fire cracker.
Tea Jokes: Why did the American colonists want liberty?… Because they couldn’t handle the tea-rrible taxes!
Why did George Washington chop down the cherry tree?… Because it was a “root” cause of his honesty!
Fireworks Jokes: What do fireworks eat at a picnic?… Hot dogs and hamburgers, of course!
What’s red, white, black and blue?… Uncle Sam falling down the stairs.
4th of July Jokes: How do most Americans spend 4th of July weekend?… Stuck in traffic.
What would you get if you crossed an idiot with Yankee Doodle?… Yankee Doofus!
Music Jokes: What’s a Revolutionary War soldier’s favorite type of music?… Anything with a good “beat!”
The British thought they’d win the war… but the colonists gave them the independence treatment.
Tea Jokes: What do you call a British soldier who loves tea?… A loyalist steeped in tradition!
What did George Washington say to his spies?… Keep it on the down ‘low’.
What’s red, white, blue and green?… A seasick Uncle Sam.
Book Jokes: Why did Thomas Jefferson go to the library?… To declare his love for books.
Why did the American eagle land on the dollar bill?… Because it’s a bird of prey.
Tea Jokes: The British army loved tea… but they couldn’t handle our revolu-tea-on!
Tea Jokes: Why didn’t the colonists invite King George to their tea party?… Because he always brought too much baggage!
New York Jokes: What did the Statue of Liberty say to the New Year’s Eve ball?… “You’re looking a little down tonight!”
Flag Day Jokes: Why was the American flag always so happy?…. Because it had so many stars in its eyes!
Tea Jokes: What did the British say when they heard about the Boston Tea Party?… “This is a steep price to pay!”
Tea Jokes: How did the colonists feel after throwing all that tea away?… They were feeling a bit “brewed” up!
What’s the most patriotic dessert?… Apple pie—because it’s made in the USA!
Tea Jokes: What did the colonist say when he found a great deal on tea?… I’m Boston this bargain!
Why did Patrick Henry bring a turkey to the revolution?… To have a fowl temper.
Tea Jokes: What did King George think of the Boston Tea Party?… He thought it was just a “tea-rrible” idea!
Tea Jokes: Why did everyone want to be at the Boston Tea Party?… Because it was a real “tea-rrific” time!
Why did the American Revolution feel like a sitcom?… Because there were plenty of “Liberty” episodes!
Dog Jokes: What’s red, white, blue, and almost as ugly as a dog?… A revolutionary warthog!
What’s red, white, blue, and green?… A patriotic pickle.
Teacher: “What do you know that has stars and stripes?” Student: “A movie about a zebra!” (Top Teacher Jokes)
What is red, white, blue, and yellow?… A star-spangled banana.
Why did the colonists love their new country?… Because it was in-dependable.
How did the colonists feel about taxes?… They found them very taxing!
Tea Jokes: Why did the British army wear red coats?… So they could blend in with their tea stains!
What do you call a loyalist who loves puns?… A loyal pun-dit!
Delaware Jokes: What did George Washington say when he crossed the Delaware River?… “I’m going to make this crossing great again!”
Tea Jokes: Why did the Boston tea party never run out of drinks?… Because they had plenty of “brew”-tality!
Why did George Washington chop down the cherry tree with his hatchet?… Because his mom wouldn’t let him use the chainsaw.
Delaware Jokes: What did Washington say as he crossed the Delaware?… ”Next time I’m going to reserve a seat!”
What do you call a British soldier who can’t stop telling jokes?… A pun-dit!
What did George Washington say to his spies?… Keep it on the down ‘low’.
Flag Day Jokes: What did the American flag say to the British flag?… I’ve got stars in my eyes for freedom!
Flag Day Jokes: What did the Massachusetts flag say to the American flag?… Nothing. It waved!
Tea Jokes: What did King George III say when he heard about the Boston Tea Party?… I guess they really don’t like our brew!
Why did the American colonists go to the mountains?… To have a peak performance.
Army Jokes: The Continental Army didn’t need Wi-Fi—they had great connections with France.
Why don’t we celebrate King George’s birthday?… He didn’t want to lose the party.
Delaware Jokes: Why was George Washington a great leader?… He always knew how to cross the Delaware without a hitch!
Ocean Jokes: What’s a red, white, and blue jellyfish’s favorite holiday?… Independence Day, of course—because it’s jelly for freedom!
New York Jokes: What does the Statue of Liberty stand for?… Because she can’t sit down.
King Jokes: Why did the British soldiers hate playing cards during the American Revolution?… Because every time they saw a King or a Queen, it reminded them of the colonists!
Why did the British soldiers wear red coat?… So they could hide in the tomatoes.
Tea Jokes: Why did the colonists throw their tea into the harbor?… Because they couldn’t hold their tea!
Tea Jokes: Why did the colonists throw so much tea overboard?… They wanted to make a splash for independence!
Why did everyone love attending Revolutionary War reenactments?… Because they were always full of action and drama!
Why did the British soldiers wear red?… To make the colonists see red.
Tea Jokes: Why did the Boston tea party get out of hand?… Because everyone was just trying to brew up some fun!
Why did the British army always lose battles in the American Revolution?… They couldn’t handle all the colonial puns!
Why did the British wear red?… So they could always stop—drop—and retreat.
Flag Day Jokes: What did the American flag say to the other flag?… Nothing, it just waved.
Dinosaur Jokes: What do you get when you cross a dinosaur with fireworks?… Dino-mite!
Why was the math book sad about history class?… It knew it couldn’t count on the past!
Fireworks Jokes: “My brother swallowed a box of firecrackers.” Friend: “Is he all right now?”…. “I don’t know. I haven’t heard the last report.”
Fireworks Jokes: What did one firecracker say to the other?… My pop’s bigger than yours!
Labor Day Jokes: Why did the bald eagle start a business?… Because he wanted to soar to new heights!
What’s the American motto at the beach?… “Liberty, freedom, and sunscreen for all!”
Labor Day Jokes: Why did the bald eagle apply for a job?… Because it needed to make some soaring income!
Fireworks Jokes: Why did the fireworks fail their math test?… They were too busy exploding with excitement!
Barber Jokes: Why did the American bald eagle go to the barber?… Because it wanted a new haircut.
How did the Revolutionary War soldier keep his spirits up?… He always found a way to keep things patri-otic!
4th of July Jokes: How do pandas stay cool on Independence Day?… They use bear conditioning.
Flag Day Jokes: What did one flag say to another during the American Revolution?… “I’m really flagging, can you give me a hand?”
What do you call a lazy American?… A couch potato.
What do you call an American who loves to eat?… A foodie from the USA.
Why did the American colonists love their sandwiches?… Because they always had a little patriot-ty in every bite!
Why did the American colonists refuse to play cards?… Because they didn’t want to be dealt a bad hand in history!
Why was the Declaration of Independence so confident?… Because it knew it had a lot of signatures backing it up!
Music Jokes: What’s a patriot’s favorite type of music?… Revolution-ary tunes!
Why did the revolutionaries love their flags? Because they always had a lot of star power!
Tea Jokes: Why did the American colonists bring a ladder to the Boston Tea Party?… Because they wanted to reach new heights of rebellion!
Constitution Jokes: What did the founding fathers say when they finished drawing up the Constitution?… “That’s a founding piece of work!”
What’s a patriot’s favorite dessert?… Liberty pie!
Why did the British soldiers get lost during the revolution?… Because they kept taking the wrong colonies!
How do you know the revolution was a big deal?… Even the history books take sides!
Pennsylvania Jokes: What did the Liberty Bell say when it rang?… “I’m ringing in the new freedom!”
Why did the colonists love their hats?… Because they were top of the Plymouth fashion!
Constitution Jokes: What did the founding fathers say after a successful meeting?… “That’s a constitutional accomplishment!”
President Jokes: What’s George Washington’s favorite type of music?… The founding rock!
President Jokes:Why did Thomas Jefferson write so many letters?… Because he loved to keep a good letter-ature!
President Jokes:Why did John Adams always carry a quill?… To make sure every word was presidential!
Why did George Washington cross the Delaware?… To get to the pun-side.
What did the redcoat say at the bakery?… “I’d like a Boston cream pie… without the revolution, please.”
Why was the Liberty Bell so popular?… It always knew how to “ring” in the truth.
Why was Paul Revere always so loud?… Because he couldn’t hold his liberty.
What do you call a fight between two colonies?… A tea-off.
Why did the colonist take a ladder to the war?… He wanted to rise up.
What did King George say when he stubbed his toe?… “No taxation without explanation!”
Why was the Liberty Bell so noisy?… It had a crack-up.
What do you call a British soldier who tells jokes?… A pun-coat.
Why did the Declaration of Independence break up with the king?… It needed more space.
Why was the Continental Army so good at hide-and-seek?… Because they had Washington behind them.
What’s a redcoat’s favorite game?… Capture the flag… badly.
Why did Ben Franklin bring a kite to war?… He wanted a shock win.
What do you call it when colonists danced? … The Boston Tea Party.
Why did the musket fail its test?… It kept firing blanks.
How did the colonists win so many battles?… They had a revolution in thinking.
What did the drummer boy say at breakfast?… “These eggs need a snare.”
Why don’t redcoats write good stories?… They always lose the plot.
Why was the cannon so tired?… It had too many rounds.
What did the soldier use to keep time?… A minute-man watch.
Why did the map get in trouble?… It showed too much resistance.
What did the flag say to the wind?… “Stop pushing me around, I’m independent now!”
Why did the horse join the army?… It wanted to be part of the cal-laugh-ry.
Why couldn’t the quill write anymore?… It had no ink-dependence.
What’s a patriot’s favorite kind of joke?… One with a real revolution twist.
The redcoats lost because they didn’t blend in—too flashy.
George Washington never told lies, but he sure told good jokes.
The Boston Tea Party wasn’t a real party, but it sure stirred things up.
The Liberty Bell cracked from laughing too hard.
Paul Revere’s horse was fast—he had to gallop through history.
King George wanted control, but the colonies wanted punchlines.
The British wore red so the jokes wouldn’t see them blush.
A musket never laughs… but it always fires back.
The Declaration of Independence was signed with a smile.
The colonists didn’t throw shade—they threw tea.
Freedom tastes better than British biscuits.
Ben Franklin flew a kite and sparked up comedy.
The soldiers marched, but their jokes ran wild.
The American flag waves because it’s always in on the joke.
Minute Men—because their punchlines are quick.
The Revolution was loud, but the laughs were louder.
Why follow orders when you can follow a punchline?
The battle drums kept time—and told dad jokes.
Even muskets need a break from all the booms and jokes.
Tea was spilled, but the jokes were steeped just right.
Why did the redcoat eat crayons? He wanted to taste victory.
What did George Washington name his dog? Bark for Freedom.
Why did Paul Revere love bedtime? He liked to gallop into dreams.
Why did the colonists draw with pencils? They wanted to sketch out freedom.
What do you call tea that tells jokes? Giggli-tea.
Why did the soldier carry string? To tie up loose ends.
What’s a patriot’s favorite snack? Freedom fries.
Why did the drum go to school? To beat the test.
What did the cannon say to the ball? “Let’s roll!”
Why was the quill always smiling? It got to write happy endings.
Why did the flag bring sunglasses? Because it was too bright with pride.
Why don’t redcoats like jokes? They can’t take a laugh.
What did Ben Franklin say when he saw lightning? “Shocking!”
Why did the horses join the parade? They liked to march in style.
What did the map say to the compass? “You point me in the right way.”
Why did the patriots wear hats? To tip them to freedom.
Why did the musket blush? It saw the battle plans. W
hat did the feather say to the ink? “Let’s make history.”
Why was the tea party on a boat? Because history floats.
What do redcoats do when they fall? Wave a white giggle.
Why did the letter take a ride? It had a message to deliver.
What did the boot say to the ground? “Let’s march together.”
Why did the bell ring early? It couldn’t hold in the fun.
What did the coat say to the button? “Hold tight—it’s war time.”
Why was the star on the flag happy? It got to shine for freedom.
The Boston Tea Party started because someone couldn’t find a tea bag.
George Washington knew how to lead—and how to drop punchlines.
Redcoats wore bright uniforms so they couldn’t sneak in a joke.
The Declaration of Independence was history’s first burn letter.
King George thought he was funny—nobody laughed in the colonies.
Ben Franklin shocked more than keys with his sense of humor.
Minute Men were always on time—for battles and punchlines.
The Liberty Bell had a crack, but its timing was perfect.
Paul Revere’s ride was the first midnight comedy special. “No taxation without laughter,” said the class clown patriot.
Redcoats marched in lines because zig-zags made them dizzy.
The musket didn’t jam—it just had stage fright.
Colonists brewed freedom and spilled jokes.
A revolution isn’t complete without a few witty rebels.
Franklin didn’t just discover electricity—he sparked sarcasm.
The soldiers carried more puns than powder.
Tea was dumped because it was steeped in drama.
The quill pen was sharp—in both ink and wit.
Horses ran faster when hearing Ben Franklin’s dad jokes.
The stamp tax had people licking envelopes and burning bridges.
The battlefield was tense—until someone cracked a joke. A bayonet is sharp, but a pun can cut deeper.
George crossed the Delaware just to get away from awkward silence.
The stars on the flag shine brighter after a clever joke.
Freedom was earned—with bravery, brains, and a few punchlines.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Redcoat. Redcoat who? Redcoat your door—I’m here for tea!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Ben. Ben who? Ben waiting for freedom! Knock, knock. Who’s there? Tea. Tea who? Tea-rific day to dump some in the harbor!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Liberty. Liberty who? Liberty your jokes are too funny!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Drum. Drum who? Drum up some laughs—it’s war time! Knock, knock. Who’s there? Paul. Paul who? Paul the horses—I’m telling a joke!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Flag. Flag who? Flag me down if I get too silly.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Minute. Minute who? Minute I tell this joke, you’ll laugh!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Bell. Bell who? Bell me out, I lost the battle!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Freedom. Freedom who? Freedom fries or freedom jokes?
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Cannon. Cannon who? Cannon I tell my joke now?
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Revere. Revere who? Revere the laugh—I worked hard on it!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Quill. Quill who? Quill you let me finish the joke? Knock, knock. Who’s there? Tax. Tax who? Tax me later—I’m busy laughing!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Battle. Battle who? Battle tell you later—it’s a surprise!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Army. Army who? Army gonna make you laugh?
Knock, knock. Who’s there? George. George who? George you glad I brought my sword?
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Coat. Coat who? Coat you believe how funny I am?
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Ink. Ink who? Ink you very much for the giggle!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Hats. Hats who? Hats off to your history jokes!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Horse. Horse who? Horse you glad it’s not a redcoat?
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Stars. Stars who? Stars shining bright like a patriot’s laugh!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Rebel. Rebel who? Rebel-y loud laugh, huh?
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Boot. Boot who? Boot time you laughed at my joke!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Yankee. Yankee who? Yankee doodle laughed too!
Why did the flag go to school? To brush up on its stripes.
My dad said he’d join the redcoats, but he didn’t like the uniform.
Why did George Washington never lie? He didn’t want to axe questions.
My dad said the Liberty Bell cracked because it couldn’t handle his jokes.
Why did the tea feel unwanted? It got dumped.
Ben Franklin was shocked—by jokes and lightning.
What did the hat say to the soldier? “I’m on top of things.”
My dad says he’s like Paul Revere—always repeating himself.
Why don’t redcoats play hide-and-seek? They always stand out.
What did the musket say after a long day? “I’m shot.”
Why did the map break up with the compass? It lost direction.
Dad said he’d cross the Delaware—if the snacks were better.
What’s a soldier’s favorite color? Rebel red.
Why did the cannon take a nap? It needed a reload.
What did the feather write? A dad joke, probably.
Why did the stars on the flag feel proud? They were on point.
Dad said freedom is like his jokes—loud and often confusing.
Why did the redcoat trip? He lost his footing in the punchline.
Dad said the only thing more powerful than a cannon is his puns.
Why did the patriots refuse to play cards? They didn’t want to deal with taxes.
Why did the cannon go to therapy? It had too much pressure.
What did the Continental Army say to the redcoats? “You’re out of line!”
Why was the flag always so positive? It waved at everything.
How did the colonists prefer their tea? Free!
What did the British soldier say to his friend? “Let’s stick together—like musket and powder!”
Why did the soldiers carry paper? They were looking for a “note”worthy battle.
Why don’t battles ever go smoothly? Because someone always trips over their bayonet!
What’s a patriot’s favorite dance move? The liberty shuffle!
Why did the Continental Army love jokes? They were good at stirring up a revolution of laughter.
What did the redcoat call a quick retreat? A fast march away from home.
Why did the drums sound so happy? They loved a good beat.
What’s the Revolution’s favorite dessert? A Freedom pie!
Why was the tea so good at telling stories? It always had a steep plot.
What did the colonists wear to the party? A “revolutionary” outfit!
Why did the soldiers bring a pencil to battle? To draw their weapons.
What did George Washington call a good day? “Just another day in the revolution.”
Why did the redcoat go to the comedy show? He wanted to see the “pun”ishment!
What do flags do when they’re happy? They wave!
Why did the British soldiers stop eating? They couldn’t handle the colonial snacks!
What did the musket say after a long day? “That’s enough shots for today.”
Why did the battle drums never get bored? They were always pounding away.
What’s a patriot’s favorite sport? Freedom frisbee!
Why didn’t the Continental Army play cards? They couldn’t deal with a bad hand.
Why did the liberty bell get a good grade? It rang in knowledge!
Why did the Continental Army bring pencils to the battle? To draw their swords!
What did George Washington wear to school? His “Revolutionary” uniform.
Why did the flag go to the principal’s office? It was caught “waving” in class!
Why do redcoats never pass notes in class? They always get caught red-handed.
What did the teacher say to the student with a musket? “You need to keep your arms down!”
Why did the patriot refuse to sit in the back of the classroom? He wanted to stay in the front of the revolution!
What do you call a colonial student who loves to tell jokes? A class “rebel”!
Why was the American Revolution like a big test? You had to give it your best shot.
What did the Liberty Bell do during class? It rang out with excitement!
Why did the students think the redcoats were bad at math? They couldn’t “divide” properly!
What did the teacher say about the students’ quiz? “That’s a revolutionary answer!”
Why was the history book always happy? It was full of “amazing” facts!
What did the Continental Army use to write notes? A “quill” pen!
Why didn’t the musket like sitting in class? It was always too “fired up”!
What did the redcoat say when he failed the test? “I guess I’ll just have to retreat!”
Why do flags make great students? They’re always on top of things.
Why did George Washington bring a dictionary to the battle? He wanted to know the “meaning” of freedom.
What did the teacher say about the class project on the Revolution? “You’ve really ‘crossed’ the line on this one!”
Why did the students at the Continental Army school always get A’s? They had “revolutionary” grades!
What’s the best way to pass the history test? “Revolt” against the wrong answers!
Why did the musket get a job? It was ready to “fire” up the revolution.
What did the Continental Army call their favorite band? The “Liberty” Belles.
Why did George Washington bring a pencil to the battle? He wanted to “draw” his sword.
How do you make a flag laugh? Give it a good “wave”!
Why did the redcoats love music? They were always looking for a “good” beat.
What’s the Revolutionary War’s favorite type of humor? “Colonial” comedy!
Why don’t flags ever get lost? They always know which way to “wave”.
What did the teacher say about the flag? “It’s always raising the stakes!”
Why don’t soldiers ever tell secrets? Because they can’t keep things under “wraps”.
How do you make a redcoat smile? Just “tax” them with a good joke.
Why did the Continental Army play cards? They loved a “revolutionary” hand.
What did Paul Revere say to his horse?… “Let’s get moving, we’ve got a long night to “ride” out!”
Why did the revolutionaries throw tea in the harbor?… They were making a “steep” decision.
How did the revolutionaries write their notes?… With “freedom” of penmanship!
Why don’t redcoats make good comedians?… They always get “caught” in their punchlines.
Why do flags always look so cheerful?… They know how to “wave” through life.
Why was the American Revolution so loud?… There were too many “booms” and “bangs”!
Why do soldiers never play hide-and-seek?… They can’t ever stay “hidden” for long!
How did the Continental Army stay organized?… They always had a good “plan of attack”.
What did the soldiers bring to the comedy show?… A lot of “firepower” for laughs!
Why did the drums at the battle sound so good?… They had the perfect “beat” for revolution.
What did the rebels say to the British?… “You’re just here for the “tax” purposes!”
Why was George Washington’s joke always funny?… Because it was “revolutionary”!
Why didn’t the redcoats like their new uniforms?… They felt “out of line”!

American Revolutionary War Jokes

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