Super Bowl Jokes

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Super Bowl Knock Knock Jokes: Knock knock?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best Super Bowl jokes.
Illinois Jokes: What is the difference between a Chicago Bears fan and Marty McFly?… Eventually Marty McFly stopped going back to 1985.
Indiana Jokes: What does COLTS stand for?… Count. On. Losing. The Super Bowl.
Kansas Jokes: Super Bowl LVII: Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Howa… Howa who?… How about them Chiefs? (Super Bowl Knock Knock Jokes)
Super Bowl LV Florida Jokes & New England Jokes: Tom Brady is a very polarizing sports figure. On one hand, he has FIVE super bowl rings…. But on the other hand, he has two.
Super Bowl LIX Jokes: What company owns the rights to Super Bowl 59?… NetfLIX.
Super Bowl LI: New England Jokes: The last time a group of New Englanders destroyed Atlanta this badly… Sherman marched to the sea!
Super Bowl LVIII: Nevada Jokes: What is the most popular offensive football position for the Vegas Super Bowl?… the slot receiver.
Super Bowl LIX: Washington Jokes: “Hey, Seattle, wanna win the Super Bowl?” “No, thanks. We’ll pass.”
Nevada Jokes: Where’s the best place to watch the Raiders in the Super bowl?… The History Channel.
Wild Card Weekend: Fantasy football…. Thinking your NFL team can win a playoff game.
Regular Season: Fantasy football…. Thinking your NFL team can make the playoffs.
Divisional Round: Fantasy football…. Thinking your NFL team can win a divisional round playoff game.
Super Bowl: Fantasy football…. Thinking your NFL team can win the Super Bowl game.
Fantasy football is you thinking your team has a chance to win the Super Bowl.
Cemetery Jokes: A man is attending the Super Bowl, when he notices an empty seat. Thinking this to be strange, the man asks the person sitting next to the empty seat if he knows who sits there. The guy replies: Well, I bought two tickets for my wife and I a long time ago, but she passed away. So the man asks: Couldn’t you have brought someone else? “They’re all at the funeral.” (Cemetery Jokes)
Pizza Jokes: “Let’s remember the real heroes at the Super Bowl… the pizza deliver guys.” Rainn Wilson
Music Jokes: What do The Beatles and the San Francisco 49ers have in common?… Neither performed at the Super Bowl.
Music Jokes: What do you call a 49’s fan holding a bottle of champagne after Super Bowl XLVII… A waiter.
Super Bowl LVIII: Archery Jokes: Who are the archers betting on in Super Bowl LVIII?… the Kansas City Chiefs. Their home field is Arrowhead Stadium.
Middle School Jokes: Middle School Student learning Roman numerals: Teacher, when are we going to use any of this in real life? Teacher: Only once a year at Super Bowl time.
Psychology Jokes: Why do psychiatrists love Super Bowl football players?… Because they tackle their problems head-on!
Music Jokes: Super Bowl LVIII: What did Mahomes say when he heard who was performing the Super Bowl halftime show?… YEAH! YEAH! I used to listen to his music in the club with Mahomies!
New England Jokes: Tom Brady originally offered that MVP Chevy Colorado to Pete Carroll… …However, Carroll said “No thanks! I’ll pass.”
Did you hear the jokes about the game winning Super Bowl touchdown?… It crosses the line.
Music Jokes: I just don’t understand why everyone is making such a big deal about Eminem kneeling at the Super Bowl… He literally said his knees were weak like 2 minutes earlier…
Lord of the Rings Jokes: I’m throwing a hobbit Super Bowl party… It’s just a little get-together.
Why did the Broncos wear white jerseys in Super Bowl 50?… Because it’s hard to catch a white bronco in California.
Iowa Jokes: Knock, Knock.. Who’s there?… Iowa… Iowa who?… Iowa little money to my bookie. I lost a Super Bowl bet.
Iowa Jokes: Knock, Knock.. Who’s there?… Iowa… Iowa who?… Iowa a lot money to my credit card. I just went to the Super Bowl.
Archery Jokes: Where is an archers favorite NFL stadium?… Arrowhead Stadium. Home of the Kansas City Chiefs.
What kind of pastry do defensive backs eat before playing the big game?… Turnovers!
Kansas Jokes: I was watching the Super Bowl at my friend’s house when my real estate agent called me… Told me some of my property had burned down. In both cases, Mahomes’ on fire.
Why do football players never wear glasses at the Super Bowl?… Because it is a contact sport!
Cinco De Mayo Jokes: Super Bowl LVII: Which artist could have had a bigger performance than Rihanna at the Super Bowl?… A Rihanna Grande.
Music Jokes: What did the NFL Commissioner say when Adele turned down the Super Bowl Halftime Show?… “Never mind, I’ll find someone like you.”
Math Jokes: Super Bowl LIV was on 02/02/2020 so if you’re into palindromes… I guess that was your Super Bowl or something!
Cow Jokes: Where do for Super Bowl quarterbacks go when they get old?… Out to pass-ture.
Super Bowl XLV: “I told him, we are not discussing changing our city’s name until he brings home that Lombardi Trophy. So Tom and I will have that discussion in due time. Yes, we will talk about that, changing ‘Tampa,’ since we are becoming a title town, to ‘Tompa Bay.’ We’ll have those discussions.” Tampa Mayor Jane Castor
New England Jokes: Tom Brady retired, but he does so as the GOAT, with 7 Super Bowls, but more importantly, he’s 5x better than Nickelback.… He’s a quarterback.
The Patriots aren’t going to the Super Bowl this year… I’m deflated.
What do the winning Super Bowl team, Karl Malone, and the mailman have in common?… They always deliver.
Why will all of the referees check their voicemail immediately after the Super Bowl?… So they can hear someone say “no missed calls.”
New England Jokes: Super Bowl LI: You know, I don’t find the Super Bowl LI win all that historic… After all, this isn’t the first time Atlanta was burned by the North.
Super Bowl LII: Why did the Eagles win the Super Bowl?… They’re very talonted.
New England Jokes: Super Bowl LIII Halftime Score: At halftime it’s Maroon 5 Patriots 3 Rams 0!
Super Bowl Knock Knock Jokes: Super Bowl XLVII: Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Howa… Howa who?… How about Taylor Swift dating Travis Kelce?
What do the losing Super Bowl team and the mailman have in common?… Neither deliver on Sunday night.
New England Jokes: Patriots fans are being charged more money for Super Bowl tickets… It’s because of inflation.
Ice Cream Jokes: What dessert do they serve at the Super Bowl?… Sundaes.
Why can’t Mahomes call his momma after the Super Bowl?… No reception.
Music Jokes: Super Bowl XLVIII: Can someone Usher me to the stage for the Super Bowl Halftime Show?
Music Jokes: Super Bowl XLVII: What does Rihanna say when she doesn’t approve of Super Bowl commercials?… “Oh nah nah!”
Super Bowl LIII: I guess the Rams ended the Super Bowl the way they ended the season… 13-3.
Labor Day Jokes: How do they hire Super Bowl referees?… With stilts.
Dad Jokes: What do you call a Super Bowl lineman’s kids?… Chips off the old blocker.
Math Jokes: We will never see Super Bowl LIVE… E is not a Roman Numeral.
What’s the hardest thing about being a Super Bowl quarterback?… The ground.
What’s the difference between O. J. Simpson and the losing Super Bowl team?… O. J. Simpson had a defense.
Why are Super Bowl football stadiums always cool?… Because they’re full of fans.
We may not get a Super Bowl ring… but we’ve got onion rings.
So, it’s now officially a week after the Super Bowl, can we please stop with the Super Bowl jokes?… They’re going right over my head.
Losing Super Bowl Coach responding to interview question: “What do you think about the execution of your team? Coach Response: “I am all in favor of it!”
Police Jokes: What Super Bowl play should you be suspicious of?… The quarterback sneak.
Dog Jokes: Why didn’t the dog want to play in the Super Bowl?… He was a boxer.
Super Bowl XLVIII: Which 49ers player always gets the most dates?… Brock, he’s real Purdy!
Super Bowl XLVIII: Which 49ers player does Travis Kelce need to worry about stealing Taylor Swift’s affections?… Definitely number 13, Brock. He is Purdy!
Marriage Jokes: A friend of mine has two tickets for the Super bowl. He didn’t realize when he bought them that this is the same day as his wedding – so he can’t go. If you’re interested,.. the church is in New York City and the bride’s name is Donna.
Super Bowl XLVIII: What did Christian say when he was tackled during the Super Bowl?… McCaff REALLY hurts!
Dad Jokes: I told my son that the Super Bowl is next week. He said, “Cool! I wanna watch!” I said, “Why? Your cell phone tells time.”
Time to huddle…around the chip bowl.
Super Bowl XLVIII: What does Samuel shout to Purdy during every play of the game?… Pass me Dee-ball!
Music Jokes: What did the composer say about the music at the Super Bowl?… It’s in half time.
Super Bowl XLVIII: Why does Travis Kelce listen to music on his phone before every football game?… Because he broke all the records!
Super Bowl XLVIII: Why does Purdy always feel safe in the pocket?… Because he Banks on the fact that Aaron will always get his quarterback!
Ground Hog Day Jokes: What is Super Bowl Quarterback Joe Burrow’s favorite holiday?… Ground Hog Day!
Music Jokes: No one knows what Lady Gaga is going to do during the Super Bowl… Because you can’t read her poker face.
Skeleton Jokes: Why didn’t the skeleton go to the Super Bowl?… Because he had no body to go with.
How did the Seahawks feel after they lost the Super Bowl 24-6? “Deflated” “I’m just here so I don’t get fined”
What was Elvis’s favorite Super Bowl snack?… The jailhouse guac!
Super Bowl Episode 50: Peyton Strikes Back.
What’s the difference between the losing Super Bowl football team and a dollar bill?… You can still get four quarters out of a dollar bill.
Super Bowl Knock Knock Jokes: Knock, knock?… Who is there?… August… August Who?… A gusta go watch the Super Bowl!
Super Bowl XLV: Should Tampa Bay be called Champ a Bay?
Super Bowl XLVIII: Did you hear about how Mahomes almost got tackled during the last play of the Super Bowl?… Thankfully, he was saved by the Bell!
Where is an archers favorite NFL stadium?… Arrowhead Stadium. Home of the Kansas City Chiefs.
What do you say to greet someone when you first get to a Super Bowl party?… Gimme some pigskin!
New England Jokes: Dad, how do you win a Super Bowl without cheating?… I don’t know son, we are Patriots fans.
Cheerleading Jokes: Who are the happiest people at the Super Bowl?… The cheerleaders.
The only penalty I know is double-dipping.
Why was the Super Bowl receiver nicknamed “Bad News?”… Because bad news travels fast.
Super Bowl XLVIII: What did Purdy say to Brandon during the last play of the Super Bowl?… Aiyuk gonna catch this ball? If not, Samuel will!
Why do field goal kickers bring string to the Super Bowl?… Just in case they need to tie the score.
Super Bowl XLVIII: What’s the difference between Super Bowl quarterback Patrick Mahomes and a baby?… One takes the snap, the other takes a nap.
Super Bowl XLVIII: What’s the difference between Super Bowl quarterback Brock Purdy and a baby?… One takes the snap, the other takes a nap.
Christmas Jokes: How did Scrooge win the Super Bowl?… The ghost of Christmas passed.
Did you hear that Campbell’s is one of the main sponsors of the big game this year?… Talk about a Soup-er Bowl!
Did you hear about the joke the Super Bowl quarterback told his receivers?… It went over their heads.
How is the bad economy affecting the Super Bowl?… Instead of a coin toss they are now going to play rock, paper, scissors!
What is harder for a Super Bowl receiver to catch the faster he runs?… His breath!
Ground Hog Day Jokes: How was the Super Bowl football coach’s game plan on Groundhog day?… To use the running game of course. He wanted to “ground” it out.
I wasn’t sure if I wanted to go to church or a football game. So, my friend decided to toss a coin… It took 9 tosses to finally decide that we’d be going to the game.
Elementary School Jokes A first-grade teacher can’t believe her student isn’t hyped up about the Super Bowl. “It’s a huge event. Why aren’t you excited?” “Because I’m not a football fan. My parents love basketball, so I do too,” says the student. “Well, that’s a lousy reason,” says the teacher. “What if your parents were morons? What would you be then?” “Then I’d be a football fan.”
Here’s my Super Bowl game plan… Devour all the snacks
Super Bowl Knock Knock Jokes: Super Bowl XLVII: Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Howa… Howa who?… How about Taylor Swift attending the Super Bowl?
Where do players dance after playing in the Super Bowl?… At a foot ball!
Super Bowl Knock Knock Jokes: Super Super Bowl XLVII: Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Howa… Howa who?… How about all the Taylor Swift fans watching the Super Bowl this year?
Super Bowl LIII One of the LOWEST POINTS of my life.
What’s the difference between a Super Bowl quarterback and a baby?… One takes the snap, the other takes a nap.
Why do Super Bowl coaches like punters?… Because punters always put their best foot forward.
Dad Jokes: Dad already knows who will win the 2025 Super Bowl… The team with the most points.
Did you hear what weather is going to be for Super Bowl LIII?… Sunny, clear sky with no Brees
Covid Jokes: Did you hear about the Corona 2021 Super Bowl ad for their beer…. It’s already gone viral.
What’s as big as the Lombardi trophy, but weighs nothing?… It’s shadow.
Why do football players never get good seats on the flight to the Super Bowl game?… Because they always say, “Put me in coach!”
Why did the poor, rookie Super Bowl quarterback have his receivers cross at midfield?… Because he was trying to make ends meet!
Why is Charlie Sheen in such a good mood?… Because James Harrison now holds the record for most illegal hits!
Covid Jokes: Corona didn’t need an ad in the Super Bowl for their beer…. It’s already gone viral.
Where do Super Bowl contenders get their uniforms for the big game?… New Jersey!
Why should players wear armor to the Super Bowl?… Because it’s a knight game!
What’s the difference between the losing Super Bowl team’s fan and a baby?… A baby will stop whining eventually.
Reindeer Jokes: What did the reindeer say to the football player?… “Your Blitzen days are over!”
Can Super Bowl players can jump higher than the goal posts?… Yes, field goal posts can’t jump!
Super Bowl Knock Knock Jokes: Knock Knock… Who’s there?…Hans…Hans who?… Hans to the face is a penalty.
Florida Jokes: The Buccaneers didn’t win the Super Bowl… It might take weeks until we know the final score, as soon as they finish counting all the mail-in points.
Super Bowl Knock Knock Jokes: Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Flip… Flip who?… Flip the Super Bowl coin!
What did the Super Bowl receiver say to the football before the big game?… Catch you later.
Why can’t losing Super Bowl quarterback use the phone anymore?… Because he can’t find the receiver.
TV News on the Super Bowl: It’s always “team coverage.”
I totally forgot the Super Bowl was tonight!… Don’t worry; so did the losing team…
Funny Super Bowl Ads: Amy Schumer has said she won’t do any Super Bowl commercials this year in support of Colin Kapernic. Thank God! Maybe this years Super Bowl commercials will be funny.
Why can’t there be Super Bowl games on the moon?… There’s no atmosphere!
What would you get if you crossed a Super Bowl player and the Invisible Man?… Football like no one has ever seen. (Halloween Jokes)
Super Bowl Jokes:
Why don’t football players wear glasses?… Because football is a contact sport!
Why do ghosts always get free tickets to the Super Bowl?… Because the coaches want to make sure that there is team spirit!
The Atlanta Falcons just came out and said they won the Super Bowl… until the illegal second half was played. (Georgia Jokes)
When is a Super Bowl football player like a judge?… When he sits on the bench. (Lawyer Jokes)
A guy wins a free ticket to the Super Bowl and so he’s very excited. However, he’s not so excited when he gets there and realizes his seat’s in the back of the stadium. So he looks around him for a better seat, and to his surprise he finds an empty seat right next to the field. He approaches the older guy who’s sitting in the seat next to the empty one and asks if the seat is taken. The man replies, “No.” The young guy is very surprised to hear this and asks, “How could someone pass up a seat like this?” The older guy replies, “It’s my wife’s seat. We’ve been to every Super Bowl together since the day we were married but she’s passed away.” “Oh, how sad,” the young guy says, taken aback. “I’m sorry to hear that, but couldn’t you find a friend or relative to come with you?” “No,” the man replies, “They’re all at the funeral.” (Cemetery Jokes)
What did the Super Bowl coach say to the broken vending machine?… Give me my quarterback!
Which Super Bowl player is the easiest target to hit with the football?… The wide receiver.
What is the worst drink to serve to players at the Super Bowl?… A penal-tea!
How is losing money in a payphone like the Super Bowl?… If you don’t get the quarter back, you hit the receiver!
I heard England won the Super Bowl… But what would I know, I’m not a big fan of tennis anyways. (Tennis Jokes)
Hothead Pat, upset by how the Super Bowl is going, starts destroying things. Police get on the megaphone trying to evacuate the area: “Go, Pat riots!” (New England Jokes)
Did you here about the Super Bowl player who asked his coach to flood the field so he could go in as a sub? (Veteran’s Day Jokes & Memorial Day Jokes)
In the Super Bowl, why did the football quit playing?… It was tired of being kicked around.
Why do field goal kickers attend ballet lessons?… So that they can do the splits upright! (Dance Jokes)
Since the Seahawks came out to U2 music they will win. Me: Wal-Mart had four copies of the Joshua Tree on vinyl. What a waste. Dad: I’ll buy one tomorrow… with or without you.
Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Hans… Hans who?… Hans to the face is a penalty. (Super Bowl Knock Knock Jokes)
Football fans are strange: 22 strong men run around a field for at least two hours. All this while, 80 000 people who probably don’t exercise – sit and cheer in stands.
Why are centipedes not allowed to play in the Super Bowl?… It takes too long to put their cleats on.
Why wasn’t the dog interested in playing in the Super Bowl?… It was a boxer. (Boxing Jokes)
What did the football players think about the stadium lights during the Super Bowl?… They gave them GLOWING reviews.
Why did the Super Bowl football player go to the bank?… to get his quarter back.
Why do the best Super Bowl field goal kickers take gymnastics lessons?… To learn how to split the uprights! (Gymnastics Jokes)
Congratulation Chiefs . . . . . . The best Super Bowl I have seen this year, heck, this decade!!!
How are Super Bowl tail-backs similar to water?… They both can run! (Track and Field Jokes)
If the Super Bowl went into overtime… does that mean the first 4 quarters were just a really long commercial since the game was Tide?
Super Bowl LV: What’s the difference between a Patric Mahomes and a baby?… One takes the snap, the other takes a nap. (Napping Jokes & Baby Jokes)
Why did the football players cry when they lost the Super Bowl?… They’re a bawl club.
What kind of tea do they serve football players at the Super Bowl?… Penaltea. (Tea Jokes)
What do football players wear to the Super Bowl?… Armor – because it’s a knight game. (Knight Jokes)
What do Cowboys fans do after they win the Super Bowl?… Turn off the XBox.
What did the football say to the Super Bowl place kicker?… “I get a kick out of you.”
What are you gonna bring to the super bowl party?… A big spoon!
What’s Peyton Mannings favorite TV show?… Duck Dynasty. (Duck Jokes)
How do you keep the losing Super Bowl football team out of your yard?… Put up a goalpost.
What is harder for a Super Bowl tailback to catch the faster he runs?… His breath! (Track and Field Jokes)
What’s the difference between a Super Bowl quarterback and an elementary student?… One takes the snap, the other takes a nap. (Elementary School Jokes)
What does the losing Super Bowl team and possums have in common?… Both play dead at home and get killed on the road!
Who’s the smartest player to win a Super Bowl?… Tom Brainy.
What do you call a Texans player at the Super Bowl?… Lost.
What is the hardest foot to buy a football cleat for?… A square foot. (Math Jokes)
Why is someone who borrows money but does not pay it all back like a Super Bowl player?… Because sometimes he gives you a quarter back and sometimes a half back.
My dad asked me which Super Bowl commercial I liked better, the Doritos one or the Mountain Dew one. I told him, “It’s a tie, dad.”
Did you hear that some NFL football teams don’t have a website?…They can’t string three “Ws” together.
My idea of a “super bowl” is an extra-large bowl of guacamole.
Why can’t there be Super Bowl games in space?… There’s no atmosphere!
What kind of pastry do defensive coordinators eat before the Super Bowl?… Turnovers!
What do Super Bowl players do when they get overheated?… They get closer to the fans.
Dad: Son, what would happen if neither team won the Super Bowl? Son: It’s a Tide ad.
What runs around the field during the Super Bowl – but never moves?… A wall.
What’s better than the Super Bowl?… Hyperbole.
Why wouldn’t the football player eat Wheaties?… He was waiting for a Supper bowl. (Cereal Jokes)
Which teams always get fresh uniforms for the Super Bowl?… New Jersey.
Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Tess me… Tess me who?… Tess me the football! (Super Bowl Knock Knock Jokes)
Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe, who?… Canoe name the most recent team to win the Super Bowl? (Canoe Jokes)
What did L.C. Greenwood have stuck in his teeth in Superbowl X?… A quarterback!.
What’s the difference between a Tom Brady and a baby?… One takes the snap, the other takes a nap. (Napping Jokes & Baby Jokes)
How are Super Bowl tail-backs similar to water?… They both can run! (Track and Field Jokes)
Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe, who?… Canoe name the most recent halftime performance at the Super Bowl? (Canoe Jokes)
Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe, who?… Canoe name the most recent team to lose the Super Bowl? (Canoe Jokes)
Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe, who?… Canoe name the most recent coach to win the Super Bowl? (Canoe Jokes)
Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe, who?… Canoe name the most recent coach to lose the Super Bowl? (Canoe Jokes)
That Super Bowl was so good… It was the best one I’ve seen all year.
Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe, who?… Canoe name the most recent player to win the Super Bowl MVP? (Canoe Jokes)
Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe, who?… Canoe name the player who has won the most Super Bowl MVPs? (Canoe Jokes)
Why will it be warmer in the stadium the day after the Super Bowl?… All the fans will be gone.
Did you hear about the Super Bowl football who wore two jackets when he painted the house?… The instructions on the can said: “Put on two coats.”
The Super Bowl is this weekend, don’t forget to bring a jacket because it’s supposed to get cold… Luckily, there shouldn’t be any Brees though.
Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe, who?… Canoe name the player who has won the most Super Bowls? (Canoe Jokes)
Why shouldn’t toddlers wear Rich Gannon jerseys on Super Bowl Sunday?… Too much of a choking hazard. (Gannon threw a Super Bowl record five interceptions, three of which were returned for touchdowns)
Where do the quickest football players like to eat?… Fast food restaurants. (Fast Food Jokes)
Why was the tiny ghost asked to join the Super Bowl football team?… They needed a little team spirit. (Ghost Jokes)
Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe, who?… Canoe name the franchise who has won the most Super Bowls? (Canoe Jokes)
Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe, who?… Canoe name the coach who has won the most Super Bowls? (Canoe Jokes)
What do you call a Lions player at the Super Bowl?… A spectator.
Super Bowl LIII Tom Brady is a very polarizing sports figure. On one hand, he has FIVE super bowl rings…. But on the other hand, he only has one.
What did the composer say about the music at the Super Bowl?… It’s in half time. (Music Jokes)
How are scrambled eggs like slow Super Bowl corner-backs?… They’re both beaten.
My friend bought tickets for the Super Bowl LV on February 7th 2021 in Tampa Bay not realizing that it is also the day of his marriage. So if someone is interested… The church is in Rochester, the women’s name is Clarissa. (Wedding Jokes & Florida Jokes)
Where do athletes go to get a new Super Bowl uniform?… New Jersey. (Geography Jokes & Top 10 Jokes for U.S. States)
Which football player wears the biggest helmet on Super Bowl Sunday?… The one with the biggest head! (Biology Jokes)
Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Flip… Flip me who?… Flip me the football!
What do you call an Atlanta Falcons football player with a Super Bowl ring?… A thief. (Police Jokes)
Why did the football quit playing in the Super Bowl?… It was tired of being kicked around.
What do you call a groundhog that plays in the Super Bowl?… A ball hog. (Ground Hog Day Jokes)
Why do the best Super Bowl field goal kickers take ballet lessons?… To learn how to split the uprights! (Ballet Jokes)
This was the most Superbowlly… Super Bowl ever Super Bowl LI. (Grammar Jokes)
What did the football players think about the stadium lights during the Super Bowl?… They gave them GLOWING reviews.
What did the football say to the Super Bowl punter?… “I get a kick out of you.” (College Jokes)
My pops and I watched the Super Bowl commercials together… We skip most of the football due to the annoying announcers, confusing rules and frequent replay delays, but I was able to come up with an answer when he asked what happens when both teams fail to score in OT. It’s a tie, Dad.
What kind of ends do you find in libraries?… Book ends. (Library Jokes)
So, there’s the Super Bowl. After that, there’s the Mega Bowl. Then, after that, there’s the Giga Bowl. Anymore than that, though, would just be Tera Bowl.
Who’s the smartest player to win a Super Bowl?… Tom Brainy.
What did the mummy Super Bowl coach say at the end of practice?… “Let’s wrap this up!” (Halloween Jokes)
Why was the receiver nicknamed “Bad News?”… Because bad news travels fast.
What did the reindeer say to the football player?… “Your Blitzen days are over!” (Reindeer Jokes)
Why was Cinderella such a bad at football?… Her coach was a pumpkin. (Halloween Jokes & Disney Jokes)
Why do Super Bowl coaches like place kicker?… Because punters always put their best foot forward. (Biology Jokes)
Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Tess me… Tess me who?… Tess me the football!
What’s the difference between a Super Bowl quarterback and a kindergarten student?… One takes the snap, the other takes a nap. (Kindergarten Jokes)
What is Campbell’s favorite athletic event?… The “soup” er Bowl.
What kind of pastry do defensive backs eat before playing the Super Bowl?… Turnovers! (Dessert Jokes)
Did you hear about the joke the Super Bowl quarterback told his receivers?… It went over their heads.
How is the Super Bowl football coach’s game plan on Groundhog day?… To use the running game of course. He wanted to “ground” it out. (Ground Hog Day Jokes)
Which Super Bowl player wears the biggest cleats?… The one with the biggest feet! (Biology Jokes)
What was the Rams fan planning to do when his team won the Super Bowl?… Turn off his XBox.
What is the difference between a Browns fan and a baby?… Babies stop crying after awhile. (Baby Jokes)
How did the football team win a game on Groundhog day?… They ground it out with the running game. (Groundhog Day Jokes)
A football coach walked into the changing room before a game. He looked over to his new signing and said, “I’m not supposed to let you play since you failed arithmetic, but we need you to be in the team. So, what I have to do is ask you a math question, and if you get it right then you will be allowed to play.” The player agreed, so coach looked into his eyes intently and asked, “Okay, now concentrate hard and tell me the answer to this. What’s two plus two?” The player thought for a moment and then answered, “4?” “Did you say 4?” the coach exclaimed, excited that the player had actually got the right answer. Suddenly all the other players on the team began shouting, “Come on coach, give him another chance!” (College Jokes)
Why did the NFL football player go to the bank?… to get his quarter back.
What’s the difference between a quarterback and a baby?… One takes the snap, the other takes a nap.
What football play should you be suspicious of?… The quarterback sneak.
How is losing money in a payphone like a football game?… If you don’t get the quarter back, you hit the receiver!
What did the football say to the punter?… “I get a kick out of you.”
If you want to sack the Dolphins quarterback, what should you use?… Your fishing tackle. (Top Fishing Jokes)
Why do coaches like punters?… Because punters always put their best foot forward.
Why did the poor quarterback have his receivers cross at midfield?… Because he was trying to make ends meet.
What do you call a lineman’s kids?… Chips off the old blocker.
Did you here about the football player who asked his coach to flood the field so he could go in as a sub?
Where do hungry football players play?… In the Supper Bowl.
Did you hear that some NFL football teams don’t have a website?…They can’t string three “Ws” together.
What’s the difference between the poor, inconsistent football team and a dollar bill?… You can still get four quarters out of a dollar bill.
What does a bad football team and possums have in common?… Both play dead at home and get killed on the road!
What did the football coach say to the broken vending machine?… “Give me my quarterback!”
What kind of ends do you find in libraries?… Book ends.
Which player is the easiest target to hit with the football?… The wide receiver.
Who are the happiest people at the football game?… The cheerleaders.
Where do quarterbacks go when they get old?… Out to pass-ture.
Why can’t the struggling quarterback get into his own driveway?… Someone painted an endzone on it.
Which football team cooks gourmet meals together?… The Kansas City Chefs.
What do you call 53 millionaires around a TV watching the Super Bowl?… ALL the NFL teams not in the Super Bowl.
Why is someone who borrows money but does not pay it all back like a football player?… Because sometimes he gives you a quarter back and sometimes a half back.
Why did the elephant who was a football fan start a stampede?… Because he wanted to play for the Chargers.
What did the mummy football coach say at the end of practice?… “Let’s wrap this up!”
When is a football player like a judge?… When he sits on the bench.
What would you get if you crossed a football player and the Invisible Man?… Football like no one has ever seen.
Why was Cinderella such a bad at football?… Her coach was a pumpkin.

Funny Superbowl Quotes

I had pro offers from the Detroit Lions and Green Bay Packers, who were pretty hard up for linemen in those days. If I had gone into professional football the name Jerry Ford might have been a household word today. – President Gerald Ford
I just wrap my arms around the whole backfield and peel ‘em one by one until I get to the ball carrier. Him, I keep. – DT Big Daddy Lipscomb on his tackling technique
He is the only man I ever saw who ran his own interference. – Steve Owen on Bronko Nagurski
I want to rush for 1,000 or 1,500 yards, whichever comes first. – Saints RB, George Rogers
I’m a light eater. As soon as it’s light, I start to eat. – Art Donovan
The reason women don’t play football is because eleven of them would never wear the same outfit in public. – Phyllis Diller
“Most football players are temperamental. That’s 90 percent temper and 10 percent mental.” Doug Plank, former-Chicago Bears
“Rapport? You mean like, ‘You run as fast as you can, and I’ll throw it as far as I can?’” QB Jeff Kemp on his rapport with WR Jerry Rice
“We’re as clean as any team. We wash our hands before we hit anybody.” Nate Newton
“I always enjoy animal acts.” President Calvin Coolidge when asked if he wanted to meet the Chicago Bears

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