My Town Tutors is a great resource for parents & teachers. Check out our Guest Blogs for Education, Parents, Travel, Tutoring, Sports, Music and College.
Google Search “Top 50 Massachusetts Jokes”
- Top Massachusetts Colleges If you’re wicked smaht… You go to Harvard!
- Hot Dog Jokes: What is the most honest hot dog in Major League Baseball?… The Fenway Frank.
- 49 States “Please pass the remote” Massachusetts: “Gimme the Clickah!”
- 49 States “In the Basement” Massachusetts: “Down Cellah!”
- Pope Jokes: If you’re from Boston… You’ll know who the cahdnal is & how to take the T to JP.
- College Jokes: Yes, I am from Massachusetts. No I’m not going to pahk the cah in Hahvahd yahd!
- If you’re wicked smaht… you’ll never get cahded at the packie!
- Three Guys from Boston (Matt Damon, Ben Affleck, Jimmy) Say Every Town and City in Massachusetts Town Names: Testing an out-of-stater by asking them to pronounce Worcester, Peabody, Billerica, and Gloucester on the first try.
- Wizard of Oz Jokes: Massachusetts Movie Review of Wicked: “Wicked Pissah!”
- Boston Red Sox Jokes: Summer 2026: What’s the difference between dirt and the Boston Red Sox opponents?… Nothing, they both always get swept.
- August Boston Bucket List: Going back to school during the Marshfield Fair… just isn’t fair!.
- Fall Jokes: I fell in love with the foliage in Massachusetts… It really leaves a lasting impression!
- Boston Celtics Jokes: What famous Southern Rock anthem is the same as the Boston Celtics offense during the 1980s… Free Bird.
- Boston Marathon Jokes: I’m never again donating a dime to any charity raising funds for finishing the Boston Marathon… They just take the money and run.
- Pilgrim Jokes: If April showers bring May flowers, what do Mayflowers bring?… Pilgrims (The Mayflower Ship)
- Boston Marathon Jokes: What is the #1 marathon for cardiologists?… The Boston Marathon. They love Heartbreak Hill.
- Astronomy Jokes: Instead of doing commercials for shoulder pain, former Red Sox pitcher, Roger “Rocketman” Clemens should ask Elon Musk if he could be a spokesperson for Space X.
- Fishing Jokes: The Charlie Moore Outdoors Show is a very popular fishing show in Massachusetts. Wicked Tuna is also wicked pissah and wicked popular in Massachusetts.
- Top 10 Lines From Norm Peterson: Coach:”What’s shaking, Norm?” Norm: “All four cheeks and a couple of chins.”
- New England Jokes: Welcome to Massachusetts… Where the weather is made up and the seasons do not matter.
- New England Jokes: What James Taylor song is great for the New England seasons “Winter, Spring, Summer, or Fall?”… “You’ve Got a Friend.”
- The Rotary: Drivers from other states panic at traffic circles, while locals treat rotaries like a high-speed merge game of chicken.
- Thanksgiving Jokes: What kind of music did the Pilgrims listen to?…Plymouth Rock!
- 2026 Little League World Series: Little League World Series Jokes: Knock knock?…Who is there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe believe BridgeWATER, Massachusetts was rained out at the Little League World Series?… I guess that makes sense.
- Boston Celtics Jokes: 617 Day: The unofficial holiday of the Boston Celtics. (June 17th is the date the Celtics won the 2008 and 2024 NBA Titles.)
- American Revolution Jokes: America: Hey England, Happy Fourh of July! England: Where’s the T? America: Threw it in the Boston Harbor!
- New Hampshire Runs: Driving across the border to New Hampshire on a Sunday just because blue laws kept liquor stores closed at home.
- Pope Jokes: What is the Pope’s favorite state in America?… “Mass” achusetts.
- American Revolution Jokes: The history teacher in Massachusetts said his lessons were Revolutionary!
- Springfield: To anyone living near Boston, Springfield is considered “way out west” like it’s the frontier.
- What state would expect to see a priest pray, sneeze and sit down?… Massachusetts.
- If a Church Congregation from Massachusetts goes on a Bus Ride It would be Mass Mass Mass Transit.
- Coffee Jokes: Only in Massachusetts would there be a Dunkin Donuts next to a Dunkin Donuts.
- College Jokes: A team of scientists from MIT saw a statistic that said 80 percent of crow deaths in the state were because the crow had been hit by a truck. They decided to investigate why that was, and the results were pretty interesting. Crows often eat roadkill, so it wasn’t surprising that they were getting killed by trucks, but it was interesting that only trucks, not cars were hitting the crows. Something unique about crows is that one crow flys higher than all the other crows, who is known as the watch crow, who communicates with the others and warns them of danger. After studying the watch crow for a bit the scientists finally figured out why the trucks had been killing the crows. It turns out the watch crow could only say “caa” and not “truck.”
- The Missing Letter: The letter ‘R’ does not exist at the end of words, but it shows up out of nowhere in words like “idea-r.”
- The Dunkin’ Rule: Paranoia sets in if you cannot see a Dunkin’ or a CVS within eyeshot at all times.
- Speed Limits: The guy driving 70 mph in front of you on the highway is getting sworn at for going too slow.
- The “Regular” Coffee: Ordering a “regular” coffee gets you a coffee with loads of cream and sugar—whether you wanted it or not.
- New England Jokes: An old Vermonter who lives right on the Massachusetts boundary has his land surveyed… After the survey was complete and the new map was made, it turned out that he had been living in Massachusetts all this time. “Good” said the old man. “I can’t take any more of those Vermont winters!”
- New England Patriots… The official NFL team of the American Revolution.
- Year-Round Ice: You know you’re a true local when you keep an ice scraper in your car right next to your beach chair in July.
- The Ultimate Compliment: You almost feel disappointed if someone doesn’t flip you the bird when you steal their parking space in Southie.
- Boston Marathon Jokes: Warning: Police are on the lookout for an overweight man who did not pay his entrance fee to the Boston Marathon… He is believed to be still on the run.
- May Day Jokes: Did you hear Ted Danson, the actor who played former Red Sox reliever Sam “May Day” Malone in the TV show Cheers, is the spokesperson for May Day?
- Boston Marathon Jokes Training for the Boston Marathon is very big commitment… But it’s worth it in the long run!
- Blizzard Jokes: Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe tell the year of the historic blizzard in Massachusetts?… 1978 – the Blizzard of ’78.
- Math Jokes: What U.S. state teaches math class all year long?… Mathachusetts.
- Summer 2026: Why is Fenway Park the scariest place to play during the 2026 baseball season?… There are a few reasons #1 the Green Monster #2 WALLY the Green Monster #3 the bleacher creatures in the outfield and #4 the Red Sox happen to be the hottest team in baseball history.
- Baseball Jokes: Why are people afraid of Fenway Park?… The big, bad Green Monster.
- Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe tell me the nickname for Massachusetts?… The Bay State.