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Google Search “Ocean Jokes”

  1. Knock knock?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best jokes about oceans. 
  2. American Revolution Jokes: Why did the British cross the Atlantic in the 1770s?… To get to the other tide!
  3. What did the ocean say to students on the Whale Watching field trip?…Nothing. He waved.
  4. What do the Elves call their friends living by the sea?… Watermellons. 
  5. Navy Jokes: Why did the Navy ship blush?… Because it saw the ocean’s bottom.
  6. Navy Jokes: What’s a Navy cook’s favorite spice?… Sea-soning!
  7. Camping Jokes: The seaside camping trip was so boring that one day the tide went out and never came back. 
  8. Navy Jokes: What grades do you need to join the Navy?… 7 C’s. 
  9. Navy Jokes: Why did the sailor keep a starfish as a pet?… For some stellar company.
  10. Rhode Island Jokes: What would be a great location for the World Oceans Day Concert?… Rhode Island. It is the Ocean State.
  11. What’s a red, white, and blue jellyfish’s favorite holiday?… Independence Day, of course—because it’s jelly for freedom!
  12. What is the only question on the entrance exam to the U.S. Navy?… “Oh say, can you sea?”
  13. Summer PSA: A friendly reminder: Sharks live in the ocean. Year-round. 
  14. Summer…. Happiness comes in waves.
  15. Who would be a great artist for a World Ocean Day concert?… Billy Ocean.
  16. Why did the colonists go to the ocean?… To sea freedom.
  17. Did you hear the joke about the ocean?…Nevermind, its too deep for you.   
  18. What kind of hair do oceans have?… Wavy! 
  19. One day the amount of plastic in the ocean will be irreversible… That will be the last straw.
  20. The worst thing about sea sickness?… It comes in waves! 
  21. Beach Boys Jokes: What is the snack the Beach Boys bring to the beach?… Salt Water Taffy.
  22. What is a pirate’s favorite letter?…. Most people think it’s the ‘R’rrrr, but really it’s the ‘C’ they love. 
  23. Ocean walks into a bar. Bartender says “why so blue?” 
  24. “How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?” 
  25. Can you call the ocean something else?… Shore. 
  26. A lobster reported a crime to the police… They asked him to be more Pacific.
  27. How does the ocean floor stay up-to-date on the news?…. By following current events, of course. 
  28. What is the difference between a dog & a marine biologist?… One wags a tail and the other tags a whale. 
  29. Why did the sailor go to school?… To improve his sea-minus to a sea-plus!   
  30. Lobster Pun: The lobster said he was going to dive into the pot of boiling water, and everybody thought he was cray-sea. 
  31. What did the magician say to the fisherman?… Pick a cod, any cod. 
  32. Why is the sea so strong?… Because it has a lot of mussels! 
  33. What’s a sailor’s favorite type of movie?… A sea-quel! 
  34. What are the only notes Christopher Columbus can sing?… High C’s 
  35. How does the ocean pay its water bill?… With sand dollars! 
  36. Where does an octopus sleep?… On the seabed!
  37. What kind of #candy would a drowning person like to have?… A #ifesaver! 
  38. What has no beginning, end or middle & touches every continent?… The Ocean.  oceans #pirates 
  39. What is Gollum’s favorite bird?… A smea-gull.  oceans
  40. The #CapeCod seaside summer camp we visited last summer was so boring that one day the tide went out and never came back. 
  41. What did the fish get on his math test?… A sea plus. 
  42. Why do officers love the ocean?… It’s their wave of life.
  43. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Noah… Noah, who?… Noah good joke about oceans?
  44. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know how to tell a good ocean knock-knock joke?
  45. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know any good ocean knock knock jokes?
  46. What is a pirate’s favorite letter?…. Most people think it’s the ‘R’rrrr, but really it’s the ‘C’ they love. 
  47. Why did the teacher dive into the ocean?… She wanted to test the water!
  48. What is the best way to communicate with a fish?… Drop it a line!  oc
  49. Two wind turbines sit in the ocean, one turns to the other and says “What music do you listen to? I like pop myself.” The other turbine says “I’m a massive heavy metal fan!”
  50. Where do goldfish go on vacation?… Around the globe! 
  51. A BOOK NEVER WRITTEN: “A Marine Biologist’s Office” by D.O. Shun. 
  52. What does the ocean use to clean its clothes?… Tide! 
  53. What did one tidepool say to the other tidepool?… Show me your mussels. 
  54. Why did the lobster blush?… It saw the ocean’s bottom. 
  55. Did you hear about the lawyer who tried to sue a shark for biting all his limbs off?… He didn’t have a leg to stand on!  
  56. Do you know why they use knots instead of miles in the ocean?… Because they’ve got to keep the ocean tide.  oceans 
  57. Why did the physicist throw the stop sign into the ocean?… He was studying sign waves. 
  58. What kind of coffee was served on the Titanic?… Sanka. 
  59. Have you heard about the restaurant that caters only to dolphins?… It only has 1 customer, but at least it serves a porpoise.
  60. Did you hear the results of the game between the beach and the ocean?… It’s tide. 
  61. Do you know where fishes work?… The Offish!  oceans 
  62. What did the beach say to the wave?… “Long tide, no sea.” 
  63. “Reading while sunbathing makes you well red.” 
  64. How is the student’s grade like going on vacation?… It was at C level. 
  65. I went to an ocean themed graduation party… It was a whale of a time.
  66. What’s the most romantic ship?… Courtship.
  67. What did Cinderella wear when she went swimming in the ocean?… Glass flippers.
  68. How much trash do you have to throw in the ocean to make a new country?… None, just some tea!
  69. Who keeps the oceans clean?… Mermaids.
  70. What does a hockey game and an airboat have in common?… Loud fans. 
  71. Why don’t oysters share their pearls?…  Because they’re shellfish! 
  72. What kind of candy would a drowning person like to have?… A lifesaver! 
  73. Where do goldfish go on vacation?… Around the globe! 
  74. What does the ocean use to clean its clothes?… Tide 
  75. Why did the lobster blush?… It saw the ocean’s bottom. 
  76. What did #Cinderella wear when she went #wimming in the ocean?… Glass flippers. 
  77. What is the best way to communicate with a fish?… Drop it a line! 
  78. How much trash do you have to throw in the ocean to make a new country?… None, just some tea! 
  79. I went to an ocean graduation themed party… It was a whale of a time. 
  80. Who keeps the oceans clean?… Mermaids. 
  81. What do you call an ocean full of #tacos?… Flotilla. 
  82. Why did the whale cross the road?… To get to the other tide! 
  83. How did the ocean say hello to the sun after the eclipse?… It waved.  oceans  
  84. How do you cut a wave in half?… Use a sea saw. 
  85. What did say when he was accused of speeding through the port?… I did knot.  Which is the thirstiest ocean on the planet? The Gulp of Mexico. 
  86. Why did the fish blush? Because it saw the ocean’s bottom! 
  87. A BOOK NEVER WRITTEN: “Different Types of Lockers” by Dave E. Jones.
  88. A BOOK NEVER WRITTEN: “A Perfect Day for Sailing” by Wynn Dee.
  89.  What would you find on a haunted beach? A sand-witch! 
  90. “Pass me the shellfish,” he said crabbily. 
  91. How did the ocean say hello to the sun? It waved
  92. Why are pirates called pirates? Just because they arrrrr!
  93.  What do mussels do on their birthdays? They shell-ebrate!
  94.  What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday?Aye matey!
  95. What do you call a man with a seagull on his head? Cliff!
  96. What is a pirate’s favourite letter?What is a pirate’s favourite letter? ARR!ARR! 
  97. Why are octopuses good in a war?They’re well armed! 
  98. What kind of horse is good at swimming?A seahorse!
  99. Where do fish sleep?On the sea bed!
  100. What’s the best thing to give a seasick monster?Plenty of room!
  101. How to pirates get to the airport?They rent a cARRR!
  102. Why are pirates great singers? They hit the high Cs!
  103. What do sea monsters eat?What do sea monsters eat? Fish and ships!Fish and ships!
  104. What do you do with a sick boat?…. Bring it to the dock!
  105. Boat puns are *ferry* funny!
  106. What did the fisherman say when his fishing line got tangled?… Something a-piers to be wrong…
  107. What did the ocean say to the pirate?… Nothing—it just waved!
  108. There arrrr plenty more funny pirate jokes where that came from!
  109. Did you hear about the martial artists who fought on the beach?… They faced off in sand-to-sand combat.
  110. What crashes onto the shore on very small beaches?…. Micro-waves
  111. Why did the crab cross the beach?… To get to the other tide!
  112. What did the sand say when the tide came back in?… Long time, no sea!
  113. Know why they use knots instead of miles in the ocean?… Because they’ve got to keep the ocean tide. 
  114. Why did the teacher dive into the ocean, lake, river, or pool?… She wanted to test the water! 
  115. Hey @RegalMovies! Which fish is the most famous in the ocean?… The star fish! 
  116. Why does it take #pirates so long to learn the alphabet? They spend years at C! 
  117. Did you hear about the red ship that collided with the blue ship?… All the sailors were marooned.  
  118. Hey @AmerDentalAssn @MyLife_MySmile! Where does a killer whale go for braces?… The orca-dontist.  @TheOrcaProject 
  119. Hey @PlanetFitness @worldgymglobal What is the strongest creature in the ocean?… A mussel ! 
  120. Hey @GreyhoundBus! Which bus crossed the Atlantic Ocean?… Christopher ColumBUS. #sschat  
  121. Why did the algae & the fungus get married?… They took a lichen to each other (although, unfortunately, their marriage is now on the rocks)
  122. Hey @legalseafoods Why did the #fisherman start doing drugs?… Pier pressure. 
  123. What is a cetacean’s favourite TV show?… Whale of fortune. @WheelofFortune 
  124. Hey @MLB! What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea?… It gets wet. 
  125. Hey @ASAUSASoftball & @USABaseball What happens when you throw a red rock in the Black Sea?… It sinks to the bottom. 
  126. Hey @NEAQ! What did one wave say to the other wave?… Nothing. It just waved. 
  127. Hey @RoyalCaribbean @CarnivalCruise! What puts the white lines on the ocean?… An ocean liner. 
  128. Why don’t oysters give to charity?… Because they’re shellfish! 
  129. Hey @MELobsterFest @LobsterFromME! Why did the #lobster blush?… Because the sea weed. 
  130. Hey @themermaidnyc! What does a #mermaid wear to maths lessons?… An algae-bra #algebra #math
  131. Where do shellfish go to borrow money?… The prawn broker. @TDBank_US @WellsFargo @CitizensBank 
  132. What is a blue whale’s favourite James Bond Film?… Licence to Krill. @MGM_Studios @007 
  133. Hey @CareerBuilder @Monster! Where does seaweed look for a job?… In the ‘Kelp-wanted’ ads. 
  134. Have you heard about the restaurant that caters only to dolphins? It only has 1 customer, but at least it serves a porpoise. 
  135. Hey @APA What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?… A nervous wreck. #psychology 
  136. Hey @legalseafoods A salmon walks into a vegetarian restaurant and the waiter says, “Sorry, we don’t serve fish.” 
  137. Hey @WHOImedia @WoodsHoleSeaGnt! What does seaweed say when it’s stuck at the bottom of the sea?… “Kelp! Kelp!” 
  138. Why are seabirds so lucky in love?… Because one good tern always deserves another. 
  139. Hey @CetaceanSociety @WHALES_org! Where do you calculate the mass of a cetacean?… At a Whale-Weigh Station. #mathchat
  140. What do you call a big fish that makes you an offer you can’t refuse?…The Codfather. 
  141. What happened to the shark that swallowed a bunch of keys?…It got lockjaw. 
  142. What did the shark plead in the murder case?…Not gill-ty. 
  143. Algae A (to Algae B): “How are things?”Algae B: “Good thanks; business is blooming” 
  144. Hey @VictoriasSecret! Why does the mermaid wear seashells?…Because she grew out of her B-shells 
  145. Hey @AFTunion @NEAToday Why are there fish at the bottom of the sea?… Because they dropped out of school. 
  146. Hey @fitbit Why did the seawater keep walking around in circles?… Because it was gyred. 
  147. Hey @AmtrakNEC @Amtrak! Where do #crabs & #lobsters catch their trains?… Kings Crustacean. 
  148. Hey @eHarmony @Match! What did one flat-fish parasite say to the other at the end of their date?… “Your plaice or mine?” 
  149. How can you amplify a pirate’s DNA?… PC Arghhh. 
  150. Don’t DeleteWhat did the Bering Sea say to the coast of Alaska?… Nothing, it waved!
  151. What did the Pacific Ocean say to the Atlantic Ocean?… Nothing, it just waved!
  152. What has no beginning, end or middle & touches every continent?… The Ocean.
  153. Did you hear about the lawyer who tried to sue a shark for biting all his limbs off?… He didn’t have a leg to stand on! (Shark Jokes for Kids)
  154. Which fish is the most famous in the ocean?… The star fish! (Top Animal Jokes for Kids)
  155. Do you know where fishes work?… The Offish! (Top Animal Jokes for Kids)
  156. What did the beach say to the wave?… “Long tide, no sea.”
  157. Why does it take pirates so long to learn the alphabet?… Because they spend years at C! (Pirate Jokes for Kids)
  158. Did you hear about the red ship that collided with the blue ship?… All the sailors were marooned.
  159. Where does a killer whale go for braces?… The orca-dontist. (Dentist Jokes for Kids)
  160. What is the strongest creature in the ocean?… A mussel! (Sports Jokes for Kids)
  161. What is the best way to communicate with a fish?… Drop it a line!
  162. Why did the fisherman start doing drugs?… Pier pressure.
  163. What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea?… It gets wet.
  164. What did Cinderella wear when she went swimming in the ocean?… Glass flippers!
  165. What did one wave say to the other wave?… Nothing. It just waved.
  166. What did one tidepool say to the other tidepool?… Show me your mussels. (Sports Jokes for Kids)
  167. Why don’t oysters give to charity?… Because they’re shellfish!
  168. Which bus crossed the Atlantic Ocean?… Christopher ColumBUS.
  169. Have you heard about the restaurant that caters only to dolphins?… It only has 1 customer, but at least it serves a porpoise.
  170. What does seaweed say when it’s stuck at the bottom of the sea?… “Kelp! Kelp!”
  171. Why are seabirds so lucky in love?… Because one good tern always deserves another.
  172. What happens when you throw a red rock in the Black Sea?… It sinks to the bottom.
  173. What happened to the shark that swallowed a bunch of keys?…It got lockjaw. (Shark Jokes for Kids)
  174. What did the shark plead in the murder case?…Not gill-ty. (Shark Jokes for Kids)
  175. Why are there fish at the bottom of the sea?… Because they dropped out of school.
  176. Where do crabs & lobsters catch their trains?… Kings Crustacean.
  177. What puts the white lines on the ocean?… An ocean liner.

PG-13

  1. What do you call a big fish that makes you an offer you can’t refuse?…The Codfather.
  2. Why did the lobster blush?… Because the sea weed.
  3. What does a mermaid wear to maths lessons?… An algae-bra
  4. Why did the algae & the fungus get married?… They took a lichen to each other (although, unfortunately, their marriage is now on the rocks)
  5. What is a cetacean’s favorite TV show?… Whale of fortune.
  6. Where do shellfish go to borrow money?… The prawn broker.
  7. What is a blue whale’s favorite James Bond Film?… Licence to Krill.
  8. Where does seaweed look for a job?… In the ‘Kelp-wanted’ ads.
  9. A salmon walks into a vegetarian restaurant and the waiter says, “Sorry, we don’t serve fish.”
  10. What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?… A nervous wreck.
  11. Where do you calculate the mass of a cetacean?… At a Whale-Weigh Station.
  12. Algae A (to Algae B): “How are things?”Algae B: “Good thanks; business is blooming.”
  13. Why does the mermaid wear seashells?…Because she grew out of her B-shells.
  14. Why did the seawater keep walking around in circles?… Because it was gyred.
  15. What did one flat-fish parasite say to the other at the end of their date?… “Your plaice or mine?”
  16. How can you amplify a pirate’s DNA?… PC Arghhh.