Arkansas Jokes

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1. Knock knock?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best Arkansas jokes.
2. Pirate Jokes:Which state has the most pirates?… Arrrrrrrkansas.
3. Tennessee Jokes: What did Tennessee?… The same thing Arkansas.
4. Solar Eclipse Jokes: My girlfriend wants to drive from FL to Arkansas for the total eclipse in 2024. I told her not to pack the sunblock because they’ll have some there.
5. Arkansas Basketball Jokes: The “Empty” Roster Joke: Upon taking the job at Arkansas, Coach John Calipari joked about his rebuilding task by telling the media, “I met with the team. There is no team…”
6. Indiana Jokes & Indiana Jones Jokes: Most people think Indiana Jones’ favorite state is Indiana. However they are wrong … It is ARK ansas.
7. Can you name the capital in Arkansas?… “A.”
8. Did you know Arkansas is in the Bible?… Noah looked out the Ark and saw.
9. Florida Jokes: Which state should the Tampa Bay Buccaneers move to?… Arrrrrrrrrkansas. 
10. An Angel Came to Coach Calipari: Coach I have some good news and some bad news. The good news is when it is all said and done, despite a few NCAA violations, you are going to heaven. The bad news is you will have to face St. Peter again. 
11. 2026 March Madness Jokes: What was the most requested song in 2026 leading up to the West Regional in Arizona, Arkansas, Purdue, Texas?… “Do You Know the Way to San Jose” by Dionne Warwick (1968).
12. Delaware Jokes: What did Delaware see?… Same thing Arkansas.
13. Why did John Calipari cross the road?… To hit up the ATM so he could pay another 6’11” forward.
14. March Madness Basketball Jokes: What do you call a University of Arkansas basketball player who never passes the basketball?… A ball hog. 
15. College Jokes: 2 college friends skip studying for Physics final to party. Two students were taking Physics at Arkansas State. They did pretty well on all of the other assessments. Going into the final, they had a solid “A.” These two friends were so confident going into the final that the weekend before finals week (even though the final was on Monday), they decided to go to and party with some friends at the University of Arkansas. They had a great time, however, they overslept all day Sunday and didn’t make it back to campus until early Monday morning. Rather than taking the final then, they found their professor after the final to explain to him why they missed the final. They told him that they went up to the for the weekend, and had planned to come back in time to study, but that they had a flat tire on the way back, and didn’t have a spare, and couldn’t get help for a long time, so they were late in getting back to campus. The professor thought this over and told them they could make up the final on the following day. The two guys were elated and relieved. They studied that night and went in the next day for the final. The professor placed them in separate rooms, and handed each of them a test booklet and told them to begin. They looked at the first problem, which was worth 5 points. It was something simple. “Cool,” they thought. “This is going to be easy.” They did that problem and then turned the page. They were not prepared, however, for what they saw on this page. It said: (95 Points). Which tire?
16. Arkansas: America hates us because America ain’t us.
17. Over the summer, Arkansas expected to break the hottest temperatures ever recorded in its entire history, some places as hot as 120°F… NOT cool.
18. Over the winter, Arkansas is expected to break the coldest temperatures ever recorded in its entire history, some places as hot as -29°F… NOT cool.. FREEZING.
19. Knock knockout?… Who is there?… Canoe… Canoe Who?… Canoe name the college football teams that compete in the Battle Line Rivalry?
20. Labor Day Jokes: Arkansas Tourist: “Nice little town — so old and quaint. Must be a lot of odd characters around here, though, right?” Arkansas Resident: “Oh yes, quite a few. You see ’em around. But they’re mostly gone after Labor Day.”
21. Knock knockout?… Who is there?… Canoe… Canoe Who?… Canoe name the college football teams that compete in the Southwest Classic?
22. What did Alaska see?… Same thing Arkansas.
23. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Noah… Noah, who?… Noah good joke about Arkansas?
24. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know how to tell a good Arkansas knock-knock joke?
25. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know any good Arkansas knock knock jokes?
26. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name the state motto for Arkansas?
27. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Noah… Noah, who?… Noah good joke about Arkansas?
28. Geography Jokes: Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe locate Arkansas on a map?
29. Nightmares in other states are just visions of what’s really going on in Arkansas.
30. Marriage Jokes & Divorce Jokes: Arkansas is leading in rates of both marital infidelity and depression… It’s a sad state of affairs. 
31. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name the governor of Arkansas?
32. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe spell Arkansas?
33. Travel Guest Blogs: Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe visit Arkansas?
34. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe tell me if Arkansas has an MLB team ?
35. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe tell me if Arkansas has an NFL team?
36. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe tell me if Arkansas has an NHL team?
37. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe tell me if Arkansas has an NBA team?
38. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe tell me if Arkansas has an  Major League Rugby?
39. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name the state flower of Arkansas?
40. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name the state bird of Arkansas?
41. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name the two senators from Arkansas?
42. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name the U.S. Representatives from Arkansas?
43. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe believe we have 100 Arkansas jokes?
44. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe believe we have 101 Arkansas jokes?
45. Marriage Jokes: When my wife left me when I was in a terrible state… Arkansas.
46. Marriage Jokes: When my husband left me when I was in a terrible state… Arkansas.
47. What did see Boston see?… Same thing Arkansas.
48. Election Jokes: It’s so cold in this morning…on my way to work I walked passed the Arkansas capitol and the politicians had their hands in their own pockets.
49. When I was ten, my family moved to Arkansas… When I was thirteen, I found them.
50. Election Jokes: Arkansas: We’re not sure who is dumber – the politicians or the voters.
52. Napping Jokes: A retired man from Arkansas was jailed for refusing to nap… …he was resisting a rest.
54. I’m absolutely disgusted with the state my life is in right now. I live in Arkansas.
55. A guy goes into a bar in Arkansas and asks the bartender if he wants to hear a good joke. The bartender says, “Before you tell it, you should know that I am 6-2 and weigh 225 and I’m from Arkansas. See that guy at the end of the bar? He’s 6-4 and weighs 250 and he’s from Arkansas, too. And see the guy at the other end of the bar? He’s 6-6 and weighs 280 and he’s from Arkansas, too! Now, do you still want to tell your joke?” The guy says, “Nah.” To which the bartender smiles and says, “What’s the matter? Are ya chicken?” The guy says, “Nah. I just don’t want to have to explain it three times.”
56. Arkansas Tourist: “Lived in this town all your life?” Arkansas Resident: “No, not yet.”
57. What state does the Buffalo National River flow in Arkansas?… Liquid. (Arkansas Rivers)
58. What state does the Ouachita River NOT flow in?… Frozen. (Arkansas Rivers)
59. Where do fish keep their money?… In the riverbanks of the Kings River. (Arkansas Rivers)
60. What has a mouth but cannot eat?…. The Mulberry River.
61. Why don’t hipsters like the Caddo River?… It’s too mainstream.
62.  I threw a hipster into the Buffalo National River… Guess whose mainstream now?
63. A fully loaded tractor-trailer carrying 80,000 pounds of Tylenol skidded off an icy bridge, and ended up in the mighty Buffalo National River… It caused river failure.
64. Covid Jokes: Apparently, someone in gets stabbed every 52 seconds in Arkansas… poor guy.
65. In the news, had it’s first remote trial via zoom… It looks like things will be settled out of court.
66. Did you hear the joke about Arkansas Mountains?… You won’t get over it. 
67. A man from was arrested in for stealing a truck in Arkansas filled with $56,000 worth of Campbell’s soup…. I, for one, hope this guy goes away for ‘Mmm, mmm, good!’
68. Did you know that students in Arkansas can drink in high school?… You can’t really stop them after they turn 21. 
69. Cereal Jokes: Did you guys hear about that girl they found murdered in Arkansas ?… They found her covered in milk with cheerios still in her mouth… They think it was a cereal killer.
70. Arkansas Education/Testing scores are the worst in the nation… yep, we’re ranked 53rd.
71. College Jokes: How many University of Arkansas freshman does it take to change a light bulb?… None, it’s a sophomore course.
72. How many men from Arkansas do you need before you can make change for a dollar?… You can’t. Nobody in Arkansas has any cents.
73. How do you get a man from Arkansas to do sit-ups?… Put the remote control between his toes.
74. Did you hear that sports teams from Arkansas don’t have a website?… They can’t string three “Ws” together.
75. We did a DNA test on our bullfrog from Arkansas… Surprisingly, it was about 80% French, 15% German, and a tad Pole…
76. Why can’t Arkansas mountains play hide and seek?… Because they like to peak.
77. Music Jokes: A woman from Arkansas who fell in love with the DJ from her first wedding day has married him five years later… she originally asked him three years ago, but he said he wasn’t taking requests just then.
78. Arkansas Hello from the otter side.
79. Why won’t any of Arkansas’s bicycles stand up by themselves?… They are two tired.
80. Did you hear about the power outage at the University of Arkansas library?… Thirty students were stuck on the escalator for three hours.
81. Golf Jokes: Why do golfers from Arkansas always carry around two pairs of pants?… In case he got a hole-in-one
82. Golf Jokes: Why do golfers from Arkansas always carry around two shirts?… In case he got a hole-in-one.
83. Golf Jokes: Why do golfers from Arkansas always carry around two pairs of socks?… In case he got a hole-in-one.
84. Golf Jokes: Why should you never buy golf equipment made in Arkansas … Because Arkansas drivers are terrible.
85. Why do people from Arkansas love sunrises?… Because it means the world has one more day to see how great Arkansas is.
86. What goes hundreds of miles and never moves?… The Arkansas Turnpike! 
87. What is the tallest building in Arkansas?… Public Library of course, it has the most stories!
88. Why did Arkansas disband its water polo team?… All the horses drowned.
89. Why is “The Wave” banned in Arkansas Stadium?… Two fans drowned last year.
90. Divorce Jokes: Divorced couples in Arkansas are having trouble deciding who gets the Marijuana… The judges have started issuing joint custody.
91. What do you call a dishonest cat at the Arkansas Zoo?… Lion.
92. Top Teacher Jokes: The art teacher in Arkansas always said, “Draw your own conclusions, but don’t color outside the lines!”
93. Top Teacher Jokes: Why do Arkansas students excel in science?… Because they always experiment with their learning!
94. Top Teacher Jokes: The chemistry teacher in Arkansas had a great reaction to student questions… they always ignited curiosity!
95. Top Teacher Jokes: The biology class in Arkansas was so lively… it really had a cell-ebration going on!
96. College Basketball Jokes: I’m not saying Arkansas basketball players are dumb, but the coach is dressing six players for this Saturdays game. The rest will dress themselves
97. Arkansas state motto “Thank God for Mississippi.”
98. What do you call an Arkansas football player with a championship ring?… A Thief.
99. How do you get a Arkansas graduate off your porch?… Pay for the pizza.
100. What’s the most popular pick up line in Arkansas?… Nice tooth!
101. They have raised the minimum drinking age in Arkansas to 32… It seems they want to keep alcohol out of the high schools.
102. The Arkansas state library burnt down… Both books were destroyed and one wasn’t even completely colored in yet.
103. A man in rural Arkansas … is brought before a judge for his preliminary hearing. “What is the charge, counsel?”, the judge asks. “Bigotry, your honor,” the prosecutor replies. “This man has three wives.” “You idiot,” the judge says. “That ain’t bigotry, it’s trigonometry.”
104. The toothbrush was invented in Arkansas… Had it been invented anywhere else, they would have called it the teethbrush.
105. My girlfriend wants to drive from FL to Arkansas for the total eclipse in 2024. I told her not to pack the sunblock because they’ll have some there.
106. Arkansas ranks highly among other states in terms of depression and adultery… It’s a sad state of affairs.
107. How do you view Kansas in artificial reality?… ARKANSAS.
108. What do you call Kansas overrun by pirates?… Arkansas.
109. How does a person from Arkansas hold up his pants?… With a Bible belt.
110. What does the average Arkansas student get on his SAT’s?… Drool.
111. What are the best four years of an Arkansas student’s life?… Third grade.
112. Why don’t Arkansas teams have ice on the sidelines?… The guy with the recipe graduated.
113. What do you get when you drive slowly by the Arkansas campus?… A degree.
114. What’s the Arkansas State Bird?… The mosquito!