My Town Tutors is a great resource for parents & teachers. Check out our Guest Blogs for EducationParentsTravelTutoringSportsMusic and College.

  1. Knock knock?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best shark jokes!
  2. Friday the 13th, 2025: What happens when Friday the 13th falls on the 75th Anniversary of Jaws… It is JAWsome!
  3. I would like to see a Great White Shark before I die… Just not right before I die. 
  4. If you thought swimming with dolphins was expensive, you should try swimming with sharks …. It cost me an arm and a leg! 
  5. Summer PSA: A friendly reminder: Sharks live in the ocean… Year-round.
  6. Why are some sharks hard to trust?… They tell Great White lies.
  7. Three things I want to do before I die: #1 Swim next to a Great White Shark! 
  8. Music Jokes: What musical artist is on every shark’s playlist?… Seal.
  9. How can you tell if two sharks are friends?… They act chummy with one another. 
  10. Jaws Jokes: #1 Amity Island AirBNB: Summer rental, 3 rooms, outdoor shower, ocean view WITH A POOL!
  11. Where are sharks from?… Finland. 
  12. Jaws Jokes: What did the millennial say when his friend played jaws on the piano?… That low key gave me chills.
  13. Jaws Jokes: I started downloading Jaws the other day… But after one megabyte, my computer died.
  14. Did you hear about the lawyer who tried to sue a Chatham Great White Shark for biting all his limbs off?… He didn’t have a leg to stand on! 
  15. Jaws Jokes: Amity Island Summer PSA: Just remember, you’ll never need a bigger boat if you don’t go to the ocean.
  16. Jaws Jokes: If you watch Jaws backwards it’s the heartwarming story of a shark that helps physically-challenged people put their lives back together.
  17. Where did the whale go when it was bankrupt?… To the loan shark. 
  18. Prom Jokes: What did the shark say to the marlin at prom?… Lookin’ Sharp. 
  19. Teacher Jokes for June: What was the marine biologist’s kid’s excuse for not having his homework?… “My shark ate it!”
  20. Jaws Jokes: How did the Royal Family get to Martha’s Vineyard for the 50th Anniversary of Jaws… The Island Queen.
  21. What did the seal with a broken arm say to the shark?… Do not consume if seal is broken! 
  22. Jaws Jokes: Why are Bruce, the Jaws shark, hard to trust?… He tells Great White lies. 
  23. Summer PSA: Just remember, you’ll never need a bigger boat if you don’t go to the ocean. 
  24. Knock knock?…Who is there?… Canoe… Canoe who… Canoe name the scariest summer movie that was released in 1975? (Jaws)
  25. Vending machines kill more people than sharks… I’ve never even seen a shark use a vending machine. 
  26. A pirate and a sailor were exchanging stories. The sailor pointed to the pirate’s peg leg and asked, “How did you get that?” The pirate said, “Aye, I wrestled a shark and lost me leg.” The sailor pointed to the pirate’s hook and asked, “How did you get that?” The pirate said: “Aye, I fought Red Beard’s crew and lost me hand.” The sailor pointed to the pirate’s eye patch and asked, “How did you get that?” The pirate said, “Aye, a bird came by and left droppings in me eye.” The sailor said, “That’s not as impressive as the other two. …” “Aye,” the pirate answered. “It was me first day with the hook.”
  27. Knock knock?…Who is there?… Canoe… Canoe who… Canoe tell me the name the girl who was eaten in the opening scene of Jaws?
  28. What is a shark’s favorite Jimmy Buffet song?… Fins.
  29. Which sharks would you find at a construction site?… Hammerhead sharks. 
  30. Knock knock?…Who is there?… Canoe… Canoe who… Canoe tell me the name the drunk boy who is last scene with girl who was eaten in the opening scene of Jaws? (Trinity)
  31. Knock knock?…Who is there?… Canoe… Canoe who… Canoe name the director of Jaws? (Steven Spielberg)
  32. What is Bruce, the shark from Jaws, favorite Jimmy Buffet song?… Fins.
  33. What was the most requested Jimmy Buffet song at the 50th Anniversary of Jaws?… Fins.
  34. Knock knock?…Who is there?… Canoe… Canoe who… Canoe name the composer forJaws? (John Williams)
  35. A prospective businessman enters the Shark Tank. Shark 1: What’s your idea? Businessman: Ridiculously wide sunglasses. Shark 1: I’m out. Shark 2: I’m out. Hammerhead Shark: Tell me more. 
  36. Did you hear about the surfer who lost his left arm and left leg in a shark attack… He is all right now. 
  37. Which sharks do you find in heaven?… Angel sharks. 
  38. Knock knock?…Who is there?… Canoe… Canoe who… Canoe tell me the name of the marine biologist from the Woods Hole Oceanographic Institute? (Matt Hooper)
  39. Knock knock?…Who is there?… Canoe… Canoe who… Canoe tell me the name of the actor who played the marine biologist from the Woods Hole Oceanographic Institute? (Richard Dreyfuss)
  40. Bruce, the shark from Jaws, has been out of work for some time now, but don’t worry… he’s collecting workers’ chomp. 
  41. Why did the shark get sent to jail?… He was involved with some fishy business!
  42. What did the hammerhead’s boss say when he did a good job?… “You nailed it!”
  43. The shark is out of work right now, but don’t worry… he’s collecting workers’ chomp. 
  44. Amity Island Summer PSA There’s a little-known but foolproof defense against sharks… Sharks will only attack you if you’re wet. 
  45. Where do lonely sharks go to find companionship?… Sand Bars. 
  46. Summer PSA There’s a little-known but foolproof defense against sharks… Sharks will only attack you if you’re wet. 
  47. Shark Pun: Go ahead and mako my day. 
  48. Shark Pun: You’re skating on fin ice, pal… 
  49. What is a shark’s favorite song?… No-fin compares to you by Sinead O’Connor. 
  50. Where did Bruce, the Jaws shark, go to find companionship?… Sand Bars. 
  51.  What did Bruce, the Jaws shark, get on his marine biology test?… A sea-minus.
  52. What did Bruce, the Jaws shark, get on his marine biology test?… A sea-plus.
  53. The star attraction at my local aquarium has been repossessed… Turns out it was a loan shark!
  54. What did the shark get on his marine biology test?… A sea-minus.
  55. What do you call a shark that can’t stop singing “U Cant Touch This?”… An M.C. Hammerhead shark.
  56. I told a friend that I was attacked by a shark the other day. He asked, “Did you punch it on the nose?” “No,” I said, “The shark started it for no reason!” 
  57. What do sharks order at McDonalds?… A quarter flounder with cheese!
  58. What is Bruce, the Jaws shark, 2nd favorite movie?… Shaw-shark Redemption!
  59. What’s a shark’s favorite movie?… Shaw-shark Redemption!
  60. What sort of fish operates on a sick shark?… A sturgeon! 
  61. What was the shark’s favorite James Joyce novel?… FINnegan’s wake.
  62. Why didn’t the shark want to fight the octopus?… Because he knew he was well-armed! 
  63.  What did the shark get on his marine biology test?… A sea-minus. 
  64. What is even scarier to pirates than sharks?… Plank-ton. 
  65. No wonder that shark doesn’t have any friends… it’s loan shark! 
  66. What was the shark jazz musician’s favorite illegal substance?… Reefer!
  67. The star attraction at my local aquarium has been repossessed… Turns out it was a loan shark! 
  68. How do you make a shark laugh?… Tell a whale of a tale. 
  69. What do sharks use before attacking surfers?… Sun Scream. 
  70. A sailor pointed to the pirate’s peg leg “How did you get that?” Pirate “I wrestled a shark & lost me leg.” The sailor pointed to the pirate’s hook “How did you get that?” Pirate “I fought Red Beard’s crew & lost me hand.” The sailor pointed to the pirate’s eye patch, “How did you get that?” The pirate said, “a bird left droppings in me eye.” Sailor “That’s not as impressive as the other 2. …” Pirate “It was me 1st day with the hook.”
  71. How did the hammerhead tell his mom he did on his test?… He nailed it! 
  72. Why is a seal with just one fin safe to swim in shark infested waters?… Like everyone else, sharks know that if the seal is broken the food isn’t safe to consume! 
  73. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Otto… Otto who?… Otto be careful of sharks. 
  74. I was at the beach today when I saw a man in the sea yelling “Help, shark! Help!” I just laughed. I knew that shark wouldn’t help him! 
  75. Why did the shark cross the reef?… To get to the other tide! 
  76. Shark Pun: Sharks that steal always mako like a bandit. 
  77. How do sharks start their day?… They drink jaw-va.
  78. Did you hear about the shark ghost?… It vanished into fin air! 
  79. What kind of shark is always gambling?… A card shark! 
  80. What candy must a shark with braces avoid?… Jaw-breakers! 
  81. I was at the beach the other day when I saw a man swimming in the sea despite the warning signs about the shark-infested waters. He got attacked and lost a leg… I bet he’s kicking himself now! 
  82. I went to a Halloween party dressed as a shark…. The novelty is wearing a little fin!
  83. Why do sharks have teeth?… For eating porpoises.
  84. I once told someone I had a half brother They said “Oh different mother or different father?” And I said “Neither, there was a shark attack.”
  85. What do sharks do when they have a big choice to make?… Chews wisely! 
  86. What did one shark say to the other after eating a clown fish??… ‘Not only does it look funny, but it tastes funny too.’ 
  87. If you watch Jaws backwards it’s the heartwarming story of a shark that helps disabled people put their lives back together. 
  88. Why can’t most sharks read?… They are not part of a school.
  89. A shark could swim faster than me, but I could probably run faster than a shark. So in a triathlon, it would be all come down to who is the better cyclist.
  90. What are a shark’s two most favorite words?… Man overboard.
  91. What do a shark and a computer have in common?… They both have megabites!
  92. How did the crazy shark become normal again?… electro shark therapy! 
  93. What did the shark plead in court?… Gill-ty. 
  94. Where do country singing sharks try to make it big?… Gnashville. 
  95. Who gives sharks presents on Christmas?… Santa Jaws! 
  96. What do you call two sharks who get married?… Hooked for life.
  97. A new study shows sharks only bite those who swim in the ocean. Researchers advise not swimming there. 
  98. So we took our new dog to the beach today… I realize now it was not a good idea to name him Shark.
  99. I’m beginning to think deciding to call my dog “Shark” was a big mistake… I’ve been banned from all my local beaches! 
  100. Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight?… Because the octopus was well armed! 
  101. In the sea world, what’s it called when one thing makes something else happen?… Jaws and effect. 
  102. What did the deaf, dumb and blind shark excel at?… Finball.
  103. My friend challenged me to write a joke about hammerhead sharks… Pretty sure I nailed it.
  104. What happened when the shark got famous?… He became a starfish! 
  105. What’s a shark’s favorite TV show?… SharkTank!