101 Egg Jokes

by | Jun 4, 2019 | Latest News, School Jokes

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  1. June Knock Knock Jokes: Knock knock?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best egg jokes.
  2. Boiled eggs…. Hard to beat, aren’t they?
  3. Would you like to hear an egg yolk… I have a dozen of them.
  4. I steal my eggs from my next door neighbor…. I prefer them poached.
  5. Pancake Jokes: When the little boy was making pancakes why did the batter run away?… Because it said crack two eggs then beat it!
  6. Music Jokes: What is an egg’s favorite Michael Jackson song?… Beat It.
  7. June Jokes for Teachers: Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?… So he could grade his eggs. 
  8. I saw a sign earlier that said, “Free Range Eggs.”… I’ve never heard of Range Eggs before but at least they were free so I took some.
  9. GEGS. = Scrambled eggs.
  10. Don’t put all my eggs in one basket?… Nice try, basket industry.  
  11. June 3rd National Egg Day: The World’s Best Basketball Jokes: What’s an egg’s favorite basketball team?… Yokelahomia City Thunder. 
  12. I was going to tell you a joke about an  egg …… but it’s not all it’s cracked up to be.
  13. Grinch Jokes: What is the Grinch’s favorite breakfast dish?… Green Eggs and Ham!
  14. Dog Jokes: What do dogs eat for breakfast?… Pooched eggs.
  15. How do comedians like their eggs?… Funny side up!  
  16. Principal Jokes: What do you call an Easter Bunny who gets kicked out of school?… Egg-spelled. 
  17. Hiking Jokes: How did the egg get up the mountain?… It scrambled up.
  18. What is a dog’s favorite breakfast?… Pooched eggs and pupcakes.
  19. June Knock Knock Jokes: Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe, who?… Canoe make me bacon and eggs for breakfast? 
  20. How do you know if it’s too hot in the chicken barn?… The chickens are laying hard-boiled eggs
  21. What do you call a city of 20 million eggs?… New Yolk City!
  22. Why did the chicken lay her egg on an axe?… She wanted to hachet.
  23. What crime is an egg most afraid of?… Poaching. 
  24. What do eggs do for fun?… Kari-yolkie!
  25. Where do you find information about eggs?… In the hen-cyclopedia!
  26. June Jokes for Teachers: How do ghosts like eggs prepared before school?…Terror-fried.  
  27. Pancake Jokes: This morning I tried to flip my eggs like I do with my pancakes… Yolks on me.  
  28. Friday Jokes: What day does an Easter egg hate the most?… Good Fry-day. 
  29. Egg Jokes:
  30. Summer Camp Jokes: Where do eggs go to summer camp?… New Yolk City! 
  31. Dr. Seuss Jokes: Green Eggs and Ham might not be my first choice for breakfast… but it is a cracking read!   
  32. Why are middle school cafeteria workers cruel?… Because they batter fish, beat eggs, and whip cream.
  33. If you can’t beat them…Just have your eggs fried.
  34. Who wrote the book, Great Eggspectations?… Charles Chickens!
  35. Eggs are going up again…That’ll surprise a few chickens.
  36. What sport are the eggs good at?… Running!   
  37. Why can’t you tease egg whites?… Because they can’t take a yolk!  
  38. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Omelette… Omelette who?… Omelette Daddy light the fireworks.
  39. Friday Jokes: What day do eggs hate most?… Fry-day! 
  40. What part did the egg play in the movies?… He was an “Egg-stra.”
  41. Boston Marathon Jokes: I was watching the Boston Marathon one year, and I saw two runners in costumes. One of them was dressed as a chicken and the other dressed as an egg. I thought:…”This’ll be interesting.” 
  42. An egg walks into a bar … And makes a real mess.
  43. What is an eggs favorite tree?… A y-oak tree!  
  44. How do eggs leave the highway?… By going through the eggs-it.  
  45. What do you call an egg white with cowboy boots?… A Western omelette!  
  46. What day do eggs hate most?… Fry-day the 13th! 
  47. I wasn’t going to visit my family this November, but my mom promised to make me eggs Benedict. So I’m going home for the hollandaise.
  48. How do eggs get around?… On a s-egg-way.
  49. A scientist tried to make gum out of eggs… It was an egg spearmint. 
  50. What’s an eggs favorite basketball team?… Yokelahomia City.  
  51.  What do chickens and ice cream have in common?… eggs! 
  52. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Noah… Noah, who?… Noah good joke about eggs?
  53. I was going to tell you a joke about an Easter Egg …… but it’s not all it’s cracked up to be.
  54. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know how to tell a good egg knock-knock joke?
  55. Why is the chef so mean?… She beats the eggs! 
  56. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know any good egg knock knock jokes?
  57. My son’s asked for a strange Christmas present this year. It’s really cheap though so I don’t mind…. I’m not sure why he wants an eggs box though.
  58. Did you hear about McDonalds?… They eggspanded the breakfast menu. 
  59. What’s a hen’s favorite shipping company?…Federal Egg-spress.
  60. What do chickens call a school test? …Eggs-amination!  
  61. What does a meditating egg say?… Ohmmmmmmmlet. 
  62. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Omelet… Omelet who?… Omelet Mommy sleep in for Mothers Day. 
  63. What did the puppies make their dad for Father’s Day breakfast?… Pooched eggs!
  64. Why is the Liberty Bell like a dropped Easter egg?… They’re both cracked.
  65. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Bacon… Bacon who?… Bacon eggs for Mother’s Day!
  66.  What is the Grinch’s favorite play?… Green eggs and Hamlet! 
  67. Why are scrambled eggs like a losing hockey team?… Because they’ve both been beaten. 
  68. Why is a scrambled egg like a losing basketball team?… Because they both have been beaten.  
  69. What did the Easter Bunny say about the Easter parade?… It was eggs-cellent! 
  70. Where did the one legged pirate go for breakfast?… IHOP! 
  71. What is the difference between an elephant and a dozen eggs?… If you don’t know, I am sure not going to send you to the store for a dozen eggs. 
  72. How do monsters like their eggs?… Terri-fried!  
  73. What do you get if you cross a chicken with an alarm?… An alarm cluck. 
  74. Why did the egg go to school?… To get “egg-u-cated!”
  75. I never count my chickens before they’re hatched… Because they’re eggs.
  76. What did one egg say to another?… Your yolks crack me up.
  77. Why are scrambled eggs like a losing alpine skier?… Because they’ve both been beaten. 
  78. I saw an egg behaving oddly today…. It was probably just a bit egg-centric.
  79. Why do chickens rinse their mouth out with soap?… Because of all the fowl language.
  80. Where do Eskimos keep their eggs?… In the egg-loo.
  81. How does a hen leave it’s house?…Through the eggs-it.
  82. What did the egg do when it saw the frying pan?… It scrambled.
  83. What’s an egg’s favorite movie?… Over Easy Rider.
  84. What do you call a mischievous egg?… A practical yolker. 
  85. A man walks into a bar with a fried egg on his head. The bartender asks, “Why have you got a fried egg on your head?” The man replies, “Because boiled eggs fall off.”
  86. What do you call a self-obsessed egg?… An eggomaniac.
  87. I went to a cafe for breakfast the other day and ordered eggs. The woman behind the counter asked me, “How would you like your eggs cooked.” I said, “Does it affect the price?” “No, not at all.” she replied. In that case, I will have them cooked with sausage, hash, and bacon.
  88. What type of egg refuses to come out of his shell?… An egg-arophobic.
  89. How can you drop an egg six feet without breaking it?… By dropping it seven feet. It won’t break for the first six. 
  90. A wife was cooking her husband fried eggs for breakfast. Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen. “Careful,” he shouted, “CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my GOD! You’re cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW! We need more butter. Oh my GOD! WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER? They’re going to STICK! Careful! CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to me when you’re cooking! Never! Turn them! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST your mind? Don’t forget to salt them. You know you always forget to salt them. Use the salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!!! THE SALT!!!” The wife stared at him like he was crazy. She said, “What on earth is the matter with you? Do you think I don’t know how to fry a couple of eggs?” The husband calmly replied, “I wanted to show you what it feels like when I’m driving.”
  91. My dad always used to tell me, “Never put all your eggs in one basket.”… Which is probably why we lost the Easter egg hunt.
  92. Fried eggs aren’t all they’re cracked up to be.
  93. What do chickens serve at birthday parties?… Coop-cakes! 
  94. How did the egg get up the mountain?… It scrambled up!  
  95. What did Snow White call her chicken?… Egg white. 
  96. What grows on yolk trees?… Egg-corns!
  97. What did the eggs do when the light turned green?… They egg-celerated! 
  98. What do you call an egg taking a snooze on the job?… Egg-zosted! 
  99. What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?… A brick layer.  
  100. Why do chickens lay eggs?… Because if they dropped them they would break! 
  101. What do chickens grow on?… Eggplants!