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Google Search “Hiking Jokes“
- Knock knockout?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best hiking jokes.
- June 1st National Trails Day: I just made a pre-game playlist for basketball. It consists of Peanuts, Eminem, California Raisins and The Cranberries… I call it my Trail Mix. (California Jokes / Music Jokes / Hiking Jokes / Peanut Jokes)
- Why don’t mountains wear hats?… Because they have peaks!
- Alaska Jokes: “It’s important to remember your survival training when hiking in Alaska… Run like hell and hope your faster than your friend!”
- Alaska Jokes: Did you hear the joke about Denali (Mount McKinley 20,310 feet)?… You won’t get over it. (A Guide to Alaska’s Grandest Mountains)
- I just made a playlist for hiking in California. It consists of Peanuts, Eminem, California Raisins and The Cranberries… I call it my Trail Mix.
- Where do apples like to go #hiking?… Mount Fuji.
- My friend and I got into an argument about getting lost on a hike…I don’t know where I stand!
- The worst thing about reaching the top of the mountain?… It’s all downhill from there!
- Did you hear about the mountaineer who’s getting more money?… It’s a pay hike!
- I’m always hesitant to jump over big rocks when hiking… I wish I was boulder!
- I’m not sure how I feel about hiking…It’s ups and downs!
- What’s the laziest mountain called?… Mount Ever-rest!
- What kind of jacket do you wear on a hike?… A trail blazer!
- Moles over dramatize everything… They make mountains out of mole hills.
- Why was the #book about mountains so interesting?… Because it had so many cliff-hangers.
- My father asked me how my last hike went. I told him, “It had its ups and downs.”
- Who should carry the bear mace when #hiking with friends?… The slowest runner.
- My friend and I were #hiking. Me: “That’s a huge rock over there!” Him: “#Boulder.” Me: “THAT’S A HUGE ROCK OVER THERE.”
- What do you call a hiker with no map?… Lost!
- What should you say if you see a royal out on a walk?… ‘Hi, king!’
- What do you call a mountain’s son?… Cliff!
- What’s a hiker’s favorite type of music?… Rock and roll!
- Why don’t trees like to hike?… They can’t leave!
- How do you make a tissue dance on a hiking trip?… Put a little boogie in it!
- What do you call a group of musical mountains?… A rock band!
- Why don’t hikers ever get lost?… They follow the beaten path!
- What’s a hiker’s favorite candy?… Trail mix!
- What do you call a hiker with lots of friends?… A social climber!
- Why did the hiker bring a pan?… To cook up some fun on the trail!
- What’s a hiker’s favorite season?… Fall, because it’s un-be-leaf-able!
- 2 men are #hiking through the woods when one of them cries out, “#Snake! #Run!” His companion laughs at him. “Oh, relax. It’s only a baby,” he says. “Don’t you hear the rattle?”
- Did hear the #mountain joke?… You won’t get over it!
- Why did the grandmother start hiking?… She wanted to prove she still had some miles left in her!
- On a hike today the #mosquitoes were relentless… They were really out for blood.
- What do you call a bear caught in the rain?… A drizzly bear!
- How do hikers avoid getting blisters?… They stick to the path!
- How do you know when the moon has had enough to eat?… When it’s full.
- What’s the definition of an acorn tree?… In a nutshell, it’s an oak.
- Egg Jokes: How did the egg get up the mountain?… It scrambled up.
- Why are mountains so good at telling stories?… Because they have tall tales!
- When do you need an #umbrella for #hiking?… When you’re climbing Mt. Rain-ier.
- What do centers wear on their feet?… #Hiking shoes.
- Why did the #quarterback suddenly walk off the field?… The coach told him to take a hike!
- Why did the #science #teacher take his class on a #fieldtrip to the #mountains? … They needed higher grades.
- What do you call a bee that falls down a hill while #hiking?… A stumble bee.
- If you aren’t cracking a #smile while #hiking on the mountain… then you need to have a little change in altitude!
- Why did the hiker bring a hammer?… To hit the trail!
- Why did the baseball bat bring a hammer?… To hit the trail!
- Why did the softball bat bring a hammer?… To hit the trail!
- Did you hear the joke about the mountain?… I couldn’t get over it!
- Which mountain conserves energy all of the time?… Mount Ever rest.
- How did Harry Potter get down the hill?… #Walking J/K, rolling.
- How come the #Ghostbusters never made it very far in #Oregon Trail?… They refused to cross streams.
- What did the tree say to the hiker?… I’m rooting for you!
- What do you call a hiker with a sense of direction?… Lucky!
- Why did the hiker cross the road?… To get to the other trail!
- How do fleas travel from place to place?… By itch-hiking!
- What is a #Colorado clouds favorite drink?… Mountain Dew.
- What is a #mountain’s favorite type of #candy?… #Snow caps.
- Why wasn’t #drinking permitted on the #Oregon trail?… It was important not to fall off the wagon.
- Why can’t Mt. Rainier and Mt. Baker play hide and seek?… Because they like to peak.
- How does the #Grinch climb Mt. Crumpit?… grinch by grinch.
- What did the mountain say to the sun?… Quit peaking at me!
- How do hikers get through tough times?… They just keep climbing!
- Why are rivers so rich?… Because they have two banks!
- What’s a hiker’s favorite game?… Hide and peak!
- Why are hiking boots always polite?… Because they have good sole!
- Why don’t hikers like to argue?… Because they prefer to take the high road!
- Why did the hiker break up with the mountain?… Because the relationship was too rocky!
- Why do hikers make great friends?… They always stick together!
- Why do hikers always get good grades?… Because they never take shortcuts!
- Why don’t mountains get cold in the #winter?… They wear snowcaps.
- 2 guys are walking & come across a bear. The bear chases them. They run as fast as they can. 1 guy gets tired & decides to say a prayer, “Please turn this bear into a #Christian, Lord.” He sees the bear on its knees saying “Thank you Lord for the food I am about to receive.”
- What did the snow say to the Rocky Mountains?… I’ve got you covered.
- Where does a burger go on vacation? The Swiss (cheese) #Alps or The Cheeseapeake Valley!
- Montana, where the elevation is usually a bigger number than the town’s population.
- After twelve years of carrying #books to school, you’re well prepared for a career in backpacking.
- Why can’t the #Grinch get down from the mountain?… You can only get down from a goose.
- How would you describe the views a peppermint gets while looking at the mountains at summer camp?… Breath Taking!
- If you’re on a hike and find a fork in the road, what do you do?… Stop for #lunch.
- How do you start a fire using two pieces of wood?… Make sure one is a matchstick.
- The guitar of the noisy teenager at the next campsite makes excellent kindling.
- In an emergency, a drawstring from a hood can be used to strangle a snoring tent mate.
- Did you hear the 1 about the geologist? He took his wife for granite so she left him! @VisitNH #NH
- How did the geology student drown?… His grades were below C-level
- What is the difference between a geologist and a chemist?… A chemist will drink anything that is distilled.
- Watson: Holmes! What kind of rock is this! Holmes: Sedimentary, my dear Watson.
- What do you do with a dead geologists?… Barium
- Why shouldn’t you let a geologist drive your car?… Because they get hammered and stoned.
- Why did the man climb to the roof of McDonalds?… The told him the meal was on the house!
- Where do geologists like to relax?… In a rocking chair
- Why are geologists good at stand up comedy?… They know really “dirty” jokes.
- Did you know that geologists are athletic?… Yeah, I read it in Quartz illustrated.
- Did hear the mountain joke?… You won’t get over it!
- What do you call a bear on a hiking trail with no teeth?… A gummy bear!
- How does a train eat on a backpacking trip?… It goes chew chew!
- Why did the mushroom go on a hike?… Because it was a fungi to be with!
- How does a tree get on the internet?… It logs in!
- Why did the hiker choose to go down someone else’s path?… Because they wanted to take a hike on the wild side.
- Why are trails so smart?… Because they always know the way!
- I fell over a tree branch when I was hiking…But I’m oaky now!
- Why do hipsters always follow random rivers when they hike?… They don’t want to be too mainstream!
- Why was the man bad at hitch-hiking?… He went early to avoid the traffic!
- How do you know when a hiker has reached the summit?… When they stop posting pictures on Instagram.
- What did one hiking boot say to the other hiking boot?… Hi-tie!
- What do you call a group of hikers who constantly argue over which route to take?… The Trail Blazer
- What did the hiker say when he saw wildlife on the trail?… It’s time to bear down and keep going!
- What do you call a group of hikers who always bring too much gear?… The Overpackers
- Why did the backpacker refuse to hike in the hot, broiling sun?… Because he didn’t want a “hike” stroke.
- What did the hiker say when they reached the end of a beautiful trail?… I can’t believe I made it! I’m “trail-y” proud of myself.
- Why did the hiker refuse to continue on the trail when they saw mountains ahead?… Because they didn’t want to “peak” too soon
- Why did the hiker need new boots after just one hike?… Because they fell into an eye canyon and had to hike out with only one boot!
- Why did the backpacker’s knees go on strike during their hike?… Because they were tired of being “em-knee-sed” by all the uneven surfaces.
- Why did the backpacker’s sleeping bags refuse to zip up all the way?… Because it wanted some “in-tent-ional” ventilation.
- Why did the backpackers bring a flute on their hiking trip?… as “flute boys” in the bear world.
- What do you call a backpacker’s playlist?… The “hiking tunes” of their soul.
- Why did the backpacker feel Oak-ay after their hike?… Because they found some “re-leaf” under the shade of a tree.
- What did the backpacker’s gear say when they reached the top of a mountain?…“I can’t believe we made it to the tippy-top! It’s such a re-leaf!”
- Why did the backpacker choose soft tacos for their campfire dinner?… Because they didn’t want to deal with hard shells and a “flaming hot mess” on their hike.
- Why did the backpacker’s hiking partner keep comparing their journey to a Shakespearean play?… Because they were in “Hiking-peare’s Arden Paradise.”
- Why did the backpacker choose to hike early in the morning?…Because they wanted to beat the crowds and be an “early bird” on the trail.
- What do you give a sick bird?… Tweetment.
- Why did the white bear dissolve in water?… Because it was polar.
- How many tickles does it take to tickle an octopus?… TEN-tacles.
- What’s a snake’s favorite subject?… Hisss-tory.
- What did the volcano say to its partner?… I lava you so much!
- Why did the tomato blush?… Because they saw the salad dressing.
- What do you call a bear with no teeth?… A gummy bear.
- Why did the scarecrow become a successful hiker?… He was outstanding in his field!
- How do hikers always stay cool?… They stay in the shade!
- What do you call a hiker who likes to tell jokes?… A pun-derer!
- Why are hills always so relaxed?… They take everything in stride!
- How do you organize a space party?… You planet!
- Why don’t mountains ever get lost?… They always peak in the right direction!
- Why do you always see leopards hiking?… Because they’re always spotted!
- Why did the hiker go to school?… To climb the learning mountain!
- Why do hikers carry cameras?… To capture all the picturesque moments!
- Why did the hiker bring a map?… To trail blaze the right path!
- How do hikers communicate with each other?… They use trail mail!
- Why are hiking boots always tired?… Because they’ve been running through the woods all day!
- Why did the hiker bring a pencil on the hike?… In case they needed to draw a conclusion!
- Why did the hiker sit in the shade?… Because it was tree-mendous!
- Why did the hiker bring string?… To tie up loose ends!
- What do you call a hiker who always tells the truth?… A trailblazer!
- Why did the hiker bring a watch?… To keep track of mountain time!
- Why do hikers like riddles?… Because they love solving problems on the trail!
- What do you call a happy hiker?… A jolly wanderer!
- Why did the hiker bring an umbrella?… For some shade on the sunny trail!
- How do you catch a squirrel?… Climb a tree and act like a nut!
- Why did the hiker bring a flashlight?… For a light hike!
- Why did the hiker bring a magnet?… To find their way back!
- Why did the tree go to the dentist?… To get a root canal!
- Why do hikers wear bells?… To scare away the bears!
- What’s a hiker’s favorite type of footwear?… Trail runners!
- How do mountains stay warm in the winter?… They wear flannel shirts!
- Why did the hiker bring a spoon?… To stir up some trail mix!
- Why did the hiker take a nap?… To get some rest and relaxation!
- How do you turn a hiker into a fisherman?… Teach them to cast!
- Why did the hiker bring a fork?… To eat up the trail!
- How do hikers listen to music?… On their trail-pods!
- Why did the hiker bring a mirror?… To look at the trail behind them!
- Why did the hiker bring a sweater?… In case they got a little chilly on the trail!
- Why did the hiker wear glasses?… To see the trail better!
- How do you know a hiker is happy?… They have a spring in their step!
- Why did the hiker bring a broom?… To sweep up the trail!
- What’s a hiker’s favorite animal?… A trail-blazer!
- How do hikers know what time it is?… They look at their trail watch!
- Why did the hiker bring a towel?… In case they got wet on the trail!
- What do you call a hiker in the desert?… Lost!
- Why did the hiker bring a pillow?… To rest on the trail!
- Why did the hiker bring a tent?… For a camp-tastic time!
- What’s a hiker’s favorite fruit?… Trail mix-ed berries!
- Why did the hiker bring a comb?… To untangle the trail!
- What do you call a hiker who loves to read?… A bookworm on the trail!
- Why did the hiker bring a phone?… To call it a day!
- Why did the hiker bring a map?… To find their way!
- What’s a hiker’s favorite vegetable?… A trail of lettuce!
- Why did the hiker bring a hat?… To keep the sun off their face!
- Why did the hiker bring a chair?… To sit and enjoy the view!
- Why did the hiker bring a stick?… To keep balance on the trail!
- Why did the hiker bring a cup?… To have a sip of the great outdoors!
- Why did the hiker bring a match?… To light up the trail!
- What’s a hiker’s favorite sport?… Trail running!
- Why did the hiker bring a rope?… To tie up loose ends on the trail!
- What do you call a hiker with no shoes?… Barefoot and brave!
- Why did the hiker bring a book?… To read between the trails!
- Why did the hiker bring a knife?… To cut through the trail!
- What do you call a hiker who loves the night?… A star-gazer!
- Why did the hiker bring a whistle?… To blow off steam on the trail!
- Why did the hiker bring a jacket?… To stay warm on the trail!
- What do you call a hiker who loves to laugh?… A trail-jester!
- Why did the hiker bring a backpack?… To carry all the puns!
- Why did the hiker bring a friend?… Because trails are better with company!