101 Spiderman Jokes

by | Jul 31, 2026 | Dads, Latest News, School Jokes | 0 comments

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  1. August Knock Knock Jokes: Knock knock?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best Spiderman jokes.
  2. What is Spider-Man’s favorite brand of rice?… Uncle Ben’s.
  3. October Jokes: Who is the #1 Super Villain for October?… Doc Ock from Spiderman!
  4. Prime Day Jokes: If Wonder Woman and Spiderman went into business together… Would they call it Amazon Web Services?
  5. Michigan Basketball Jokes: Who was Spiderman’s favorite player from the Michigan “Fab Five?”… Chris Webber.
  6. Spiderman became a vigilante Meanwhile… Aunt May became a vigil auntie.
  7. What did Doc Ock drive to the bank?… “An arm oured car!
  8. Spiderman 1: Homecoming, Spiderman 2: Far from Home Spiderman 3: Homeless
  9. October Jokes: What is Doc Ock’s favorite month?… Ock-tober.
  10. February Jokes: What is Spider-Man’s favorite month?… Web-ruary. 
  11. What is a Spiderman’s  favorite part of the joke?… The “punch” line!
  12. Where’s Spiderman’s home page?… On the world wide web.
  13. What is a Spiderman’s favorite drink?… Fruit punch!
  14. Spiderman was found dead this morning… Police believe he committed insecticide.
  15. Spiderman designed a new outfit that he can wear for formal occasions… It’s a class-action suit.”
  16. Guess which Avenger paid the least taxes this year?… Spiderman, because his entire income was net income.
  17. What is Spiderman’s favorite road?… Peter parkway.
  18. Why is Spiderman so good at comebacks?… Because with great power comes great response-ability.
  19. What is Spider-Man’s favorite Disney movie?… Peter Pan.
  20. Why was Aunt May be worried about Peter Parker… He is spending so much time on the web.
  21. I can’t believe Ant Man and Spider-Man are in civil war…. That really bugs me.
  22. Did you know that Spider-Man has a winter jacket made out of Mediterranean flatbread?… It’s a pita parka.
  23. What Marvel Superhero is the best at HTML?… “Spiderman.”
  24. Why did Spider-Man borrow Uncle Ben’s car?… To take it out for a spin.
  25. Guess who missed Spiderman Homecoming?… Uncle Ben.
  26. What outdoor sport does Spider-Man like?… Fly fishing.
  27. Why are Spiderman stickers the stickiest?… They don’t peel so good.
  28. Spiderman began using firearms a few days ago… Everyone told him that it’s not a good idea but he is sticking to his guns.  
  29. Why does Spiderman hate driving with his evil twin?… Because he’s a bad parallel Parker.
  30. What month does Spider-Man hate?… Ock-tober!
  31. What is the one thing Spiderman can’t eat?… Uncle Bens Rice.
  32. Spider bite created Spiderman. What would a dog’s bite create?… Doberman.
  33. Spiderman gets a job in the CIA. What does the officer tell him?… Spy-there-man.
  34. Spiderman Jokes:
  35. Why is Spiderman such a good baseball player?… He knows how to catch flies.
  36. Where did the Spider Man find his #prom date?… On the World Wide Web.
  37. Why did the spider take #swimming lessons?… He wanted to #surf the Web.
  38. I can’t believe #AntMan and #SpiderMan are in #civilwar… That really bugs me.
  39. I’m waiting for #SpiderMan to come to the #party… He said he’s swing by soon.
  40. What is #Spiderman’s favorite #exercise?… spin class.
  41. What was Spider Man’s major in #college?… #WebDesign.
  42. Why does #SpiderMan only have 11 months on his calendar?… Because he lost #May.
  43. What does #Spiderman wear when it gets cold out?… A Peter Parka.
  44. You guys heard about this new #Spiderman restaurant? Don’t bother bringing cash… All the orders are web only.
  45. What did #WonderWoman say to #SpiderMan?… “Don’t bug me.”
  46. What #Marvel #Superhero is the best at #HTML?… #Spiderman.
  47. What do you get when you cross #Spiderman with a #flatbread?… Pita Parker.
  48. What is #Spiderman’s favorite online #music app?… Spot-a-fly.
  49. What is #Spiderman’s favorite type of #music?… Swing.
  50. What does #Spiderman use when he wants to be stealthy?… The Dark Web.
  51. Do you know what #Spiderman would name his dog?… Peter barker.
  52. Where did #BlackWidow and #SpiderMan first meet?… On the web!
  53. What is Spider-Man’s favorite month?… Web-ruary.
  54. I’m waiting for Spider-Man to come to watch the #Grinch … He said he’s swing by soon.
  55. When you are as fast and as experienced a skier as me, the snow conditions can really make a difference… I always say with great powder comes great responsibility.
  56. Why is Spider Man so good at comebacks?… Because with great power comes great response ability.
  57. What do you get when you cross Spider-Man with an ear of #corn?… Cobwebs.
  58. What does Peter Parker call a LEGO Spider-Man?… His alter-LEGO!
  59. What is Spider-Man’s favorite day?… Webnesday!
  60. How would you describe Spider-Man’s perfect home?… The world wide web!
  61. What would you call Peter Parker and MJ if they got married?… Newly webs.
  62. Why does Spider-Man spend so much time on his computer?… He was addicted to the web cam!
  63. What would you call Peter Parker if he became a doctor?… WebMD!
  64. What is Spider-Man’s favorite music genre?… Webstep.
  65. What was Peter Parker’s favorite subject at school?… Web design!
  66. How does Spider-Man communicate with other superheroes when they’re not in New York?… The World Wide Web!
  67. What do Spider-Man and dragons have in common?… Nothing really. But they’re both fictional creatures.
  68. Why is Spider-Man always so good at witty comebacks?… Because with great power, comes great response ability!
  69. Why did Spider-Man join the circus?… To show off his web-slinging skills!
  70. What stopped Spider-Man joining the fight with the Avengers?… He was stuck in the bath!
  71. Which is Spider-Man’s least favorite month?… Doc Ock-tober!
  72. What do you get when you cross Spider-Man with a potato?… Spuder-Man!
  73. What do you get when you cross Spider-Man with a T-Rex?… Jurassic Parker!
  74. What does Peter Parker always order with his burger?… French flies!
  75. Why did Spider-Man want to become a DJ?… He loves spinning decks!
  76. Why was Spider-Man looking for Doc Ock?… He committed multiple armed robberies!
  77. What would you call Spider-Man if he suddenly started jumping around buildings instead of swinging?… Peter Parkour!
  78. Why did Spiderman open a retirement account?… He wanted to turn his Spidey cents into Spidey dollars.
  79. Why doesn’t Spider-Man go to the zoo?… He doesn’t want to run into Rhino.
  80. Why doesn’t Spider-Man need any mobile data with his phone plan?… Because he’s already connected to the World Wide Web!
  81. The last twenty five years have been a bizarre time to grow up. For instance, I’ve lived through more ‘Spiderman’ re-boots than legitimate presidential elections.
  82. What is Spiderman’s favorite song?… Dust in the Wind. He can really relate.
  83. What do you call Spider-Man joining the Marvel universe?… A spin-off!
  84. What do you get when you cross Iron Man with Spiderman?… Pony Park
  85. How do you know if you’ve made Spider-Man angry?… He goes up the wall!
  86. Why does Spider-Man’s calendar only have 11 months?… Because he lost May!
  87. Why doesn’t Spider-Man like listening to Metallica?… He panics every time they play Enter Sandman!
  88. What is Spider-Man’s favorite song?… You Spin me Round by Dead or Alive.
  89. Why did Spider-Man crash his car?… Because he confused drifting with spinning!
  90. Marvel is working on a Spiderman reboot for Greek audiences… Featuring the adventures of Pita Parker
  91. Did you hear that Spiderman is in trouble with the law?… They caught him on the web looking for Mary-Jane.
  92. When we were children, we used to refer to our Grandad as Spiderman. He didn’t have any special powers, he just couldn’t get out of the bath without any assistance.
  93. What disorder will Spiderman get as he ages?… Peter Parkinsons.
  94. Did you know that the internet was invented by Spiderman?… That’s why it’s called The World Wide Web. If it had been invented by Superman, it would be called the World Wide Cape.
  95. Why is Spider-Man such a great baseball player?… Because he catches most flies!
  96. Why doesn’t Spider-Man like playing card games against Thanos?… Because he always loses the Snap!
  97. The swim team was really keen for Spider-Man to join. He’s a really fast swimmer… … because he has webbed feet!
  98. Did you know Spider-Man met Black Widow way before he met Iron Man?… They met on the web….
  99. Peter Parker passed his driving test first time… … he’s a great parallel parker!
  100. Spider-Man loves dancing… He’ll throw some shapes to any kind of music. But his favorite… … is swing!
  101. I like to think I’m half Spider-Man and half Batman… … I have no money and no superpowers!
  102. Spider-Man and MJ are going to have a baby son… … They’re going to name him Arachnakid!
  103. Spider-Man always flushes the toilet… … it’s his duty!
  104. All the toilet roll in Walmart wasn’t enough for Spider-Man… … he prefers the flypaper kind to tissue roll!
  105. Why did Spider-Man start investing in stocks and shares?… He wanted to turn his Spider cents into Spider dollars!
  106. What does Spider-Man add to his lemonade?… Just ice!
  107. What do you get when you cross a dog with Spider-Man?… Peter Barker!
  108. What does Peter Parker tell people he does for a job to help conceal his identity?… A web developer!
  109. What is Spider-Man’s favorite road?… Peter Parkway!
  110. How does Spider-Man go unnoticed?… He uses the Dark Web!
  111. Why does Spider-Man find it hard to get a girlfriend?… He’s super clingy!
  112. What do Spider-Man and Ant Man have in common?… They both bug Captain America!
  113. Why is Spina a better runner than Spider-Man?… Because he can go for miles!
  114. How does Spider-Man keep the public safe from Doc Ock?… He keeps them out of arms way!
  115. How does Spider-Man tell his villains they’re ill?… You look a little green Goblin!
  116. What do Spider-Man and Anakin Skywalker have in common?… Neither of them like sand!
  117. Why doesn’t Spider-Man like Google?… It always thinks his name is Spiderman!
  118. What job did Spider Man apply for on Indeed?… Web developer.
  119.  Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Noah… Noah, who?… Noah good joke about Spiderman?
  120. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know how to tell a good Spiderman knock-knock joke?
  121. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know any good Spiderman knock knock jokes?
  122. Who is the #1 Super Villain for #October?… Doc Ock from #Spiderman!
  123. Spider Man gets a job in the CIA. What does the officer tell him?… Spy-there-man.
  124. Where’s Spiderman’s home page?… On the world wide web.
  125. What did #IronMan say to #SpiderMan?… Don’t bug me.
  126. What is Spider-Man’s favorite day of the week?… Flyday.
  127. I tried to call Spider Man… but he was busy browsing in the web!
  128. Why was Aunt May worried about Spider-Man?… He was spending too much time on the web!He was spending too much time on the web!
  129. Why did Spider-Man get in trouble with his mom?… He spent too much time on the web.
  130. What is Doc Ock’s favorite month?… Ock-tober.
  131. What does Peter Parker call LEGO Spiderman?… His alter-LEGO!
  132. Who gets #travel sick when he tries to destroy #NewYork?…The Green Goblin!  
  133. What do you call Spider-Man joining the Marvel Universe?… A Spin-Off!
  134. What did Doc Ock do at the bank?… Commit armed robbery!
  135. What’s a Spider-Man tongue twister?… Peter Parker picked a peck of pickled peppers.
  136. How is Spider-Man like a toy top?… He’s always spinning.
  137. What do you call Spiderman with 4 legs?… Half a spider, man.
  138. How did Spider-Man learn how to make his spider-suit?… The World Wide Web.
  139. Hey @PeterPanBus! What is Spider-Man’s favorite #Disney movie?… #PeterPan.
  140. How does Spider-Man communicate with other superheroes?… The world wide web.
  141. What does Spider-Man put in his drink?… Just ice.
  142. Why is Spider-Man afraid to go out after dinner?… He’s afraid of krypto-night.
  143. Why doesn’t Spider Man like to talk to Bruce Wayne?… Because he has bat breath.
  144. What is a Spiderman’s favorite drink?… Fruit punch!
  145. Where did Spider-Man get his powers from?… The World Wide web!
  146. Why is #Superman stupid?… Because he wears his underwear over his pants.
  147. Why is #Spiderman the most stupid superhero of them all?… Because he wears his underwear over his head.
  148. “What did Doc Ock drive to the bank?”… “An armoured car!”
  149. How did Dr. Otto Octavius present his new project?… Energetically!
  150. What’s the difference between Spiderman and a unicorn?… Nothing, they’re both fictional characters.
  151. What’s the one thing Spiderman can’t eat?… Uncle Ben’s rice.
  152. Why are Spiderman stickers the stickiest?… They don’t peel so good.
  153. What do you get when you cross Iron Man with Spiderman?… Pony Park.
  154. What is spidermans favorite road?… Peter parkway.
  155. Why does Spider-Man always flush the toilet?… Because it’s his doody!
  156. What did Aquaman say to Spider Man?… “Don’t bug me.” 
  157. What is Aquaman’s favorite bird?… Sea-gulls! 
  158. What does Aquaman use to paint?… Watercolors.
  159. What is Aquaman’s favorite fruit?… Watermelons! 
  160. Who does Aquaman call when he needs help?… Michael Phelps! 
  161. How was Aquaman’s son delivered?… Via SEA-section. 
  162. What is Aquaman’s favorite color?… Aquamarine. 
  163. What is Aquaman’s favorite part of a joke?… The “punch” line! 
  164. What is Aquaman’s favorite drink?… Fruit punch! 
  165. What’s the difference between Aquaman and a unicorn?… Nothing, they’re both fictional characters. 
  166. Where’s Spiderman’s home page?… On the world wide web.
  167. How did Dr. Otto Octavius present his new project?… Energetically!
  168. What does Spider-Man call a “love triangle?”… A tangled web of love!
  169. What is Spider-Man’s favorite hobby?… Web design.
  170. What does Spiderman use when he wants to be stealthy?… The Dark Web.
  171. Why can’t Iron man wear Spiderman’s suit?… He’s dead.