My Town Tutors is a great resource for parents & teachers. Check out our Guest Blogs for Education, Parents, Travel, Tutoring, Sports, Music and College.
Google Search “101 Masters Tournament Jokes”
- Knock knock?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best Masters golf jokes.
- Knock, knock?… Who is there?… August… August Who?… A gust a National is where The Masters is played.
- What is the holiest place in golf?… Amen Corner.
- “If there’s a golf course in heaven, I hope it’s like Augusta. I just don’t want an early tee time.” Gary Player
- A man had two tickets for the Augusta Masters. As he sits down, another man comes along and asks if anyone is sitting in the seat next to him. “No”, he says, “the seat is empty.” “This is incredible!” said the man, “who in their right mind would have a seat like this, the biggest golfing event of the whole world, and not see it?” He says, “Well, actually, the seat belongs to me. My wife always would come with me, but she passed away. This is the first Masters we haven’t been to together since we got married.” “Oh … I’m sorry to hear that. That’s terrible. I guess you couldn’t find someone else? … a friend or relative or even a neighbor to take the seat?” The man shakes his head … “No. They’re all at the funeral.”
- Crayola crayons…. the unofficial sponsor of the Masters green jacket.
- Masters Pun: PAR fait… The #1 snack for golfer’s at the Masters.
- What is the most popular letter at the Masters?… “Tee.”
- Did you lose something at the Masters?…. Check the Lost and Founder’s Circle.
- UHaul… the unofficial sponsor of “moving day” at the Masters.
- How many golfers does it take to change a light bulb at the Masters?… FORE!
- Masters Pun: “Fore-giveness is key to a successful Masters round.”
- Fan: What did you get on your last hole? Struggling Masters Golfer: Depressed.
- Masters Pun: “The fairway to heaven leads to Augusta National.”
- What is the #1 hole to have a cup of tea in golf?… Tea Olive, Hole #1 at Augusta National Golf Course.
- Masters Golfer’s Wife: “When I die bury me at the golf course so my husband visits me 5 times a week.”
- Knock knock… Who’s there?…Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe tell me the name of the famous sandwich at the Masters (Pimento cheese)
- What is a golfer at the Masters favorite lunch?… A ham sand-wedge.
- What is the most popular type of music at the Masters?… Swing!
- What is a math teacher’s favorite spot at the Masters?…. The Founder’s Circle.
- Why are college basketball coaches so excited to make it to the 15th hole in golf?… They love the final fore.
- Masters Pun: “Augusta National…. where every hole is a masterpiece.”
- Why do golfers love the Masters so much?… It’s a hole new level of excitement!
- Masters Pun: “Drive for show and putt for dough” at the Masters.
- Whenever is any trouble at the Masters, the 1st place to start to investigate is at the Butler Cabin because man times… The butler did it.
- How does a golfer answer the phone during the Masters?… It’s “Fore you!”
- “I’ve heard the winner of the Masters hosts the dinner. If I ever won it, there would be no suits, no ties and McDonalds.” John Daly
- Masters Pun: “Par-fection is the name of the game at the Masters.”
- What is a geometry teacher’s favorite spot at the Masters?…. The Founder’s Circle.
- Masters Pun: “Playing Augusta is like a walk in golf heaven.”
- What did the golfer say when he hit a great shot at the Masters?… “That’s how I roll on the green!”
- Did you hear about the Masters golfer who practiced his swing in the dark?… He was known as the night clubber!
- Why do golfers bring rain gear to the Masters?… Fore their fairway weather friends!
- What did the golf ball say to the tee at the Masters?… “You drive me crazy!”
- Masters Pun: “Getting in the swing of things at Augusta’s prestigious tournament.”
- Masters Hole #4: What do you get when you cross a florist, an Alaska fisherman and an apple… Flowering Crab Apple!
- “Then last year’s champion serves as the host. He chooses the menu and picks up the tab. When I discovered the cost of dinner was more than the prize money, I finished second four times.” Ben Hogan
- Why was the golfer so bad at the Masters?… Because he kept putting the cart before the horse!
- Why did the golfer bring a pencil to the Masters?… To draw his way to victory!
- Where does an environmentalist (tree-hugger) like to watch the Masters?… Eisenhower Tree!
- “I’ve never been to heaven, and thinking back on my life, I probably won’t get a chance to go. I guess winning the Masters is as close as I’m going to get.” Fuzzy Zoeller
- Knock knock… Who’s there?…Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name of the large, evergreen tree that is everywhere at Augusta National? (Loblolly pine)
- Knock, knock?… Who is there?… August… August Who?… A gust a see if I can get a few autographs at the Masters.
- Masters Hole #18: What is Santa’s favorite hole at the Masters?… Hole 18 Holly.
- Masters Hole #5: What is a favorite golf hole for florists?… Magnolia at Augusta National Golf Course.
- The Masters sometimes falls on Good Friday… The most popular holes that year are #11, #12 and #13, Amen Corner.
- “After all these years, it’s still embarrassing for me to play on the American golf tour. Like the time I asked my caddie for a sand wedge & he came back ten minutes later with a ham and rye.” Chi Chi Rodriguez.
- Hole #8 What is a favorite golf hole for florists?… Yellow Jasmine at Augusta National Golf Course.
- Hole #9 Where do North Carolina & South Carolina bakers travel to make cherry pie?… The go to Augusta National Golf Course and set up shop at hole #9, Carolina Cherry.
- Why would computers do good golfing at the Masters?… Because they have hard drives.
- What is the difference between a Masters golfer and a fisherman?… When a golfer lies, he doesn’t have to bring anything home to prove it.
- What Masters golf hole is a thorn in the side of firefighters?… Hole 15 Fire Thorn.
- What did one golf ball say to another golf ball at the Masters?… See you a round.
- Knock, knock?… Who is there?… August… August Who?… A gust a tee off at the Masters.
- What do you get if you combine a fashion designer, dog lover, and lumberjack?… Pink Dogwood.
- What is a Georgia gardener’s favorite golf hole… Flowering Peach at Augusta National Golf Course.
- “Finishing second at the Masters was like getting kicked in the head.” David Duval
- “I’ve never been to heaven, and thinking back on my life, I probably won’t get a chance to go. I guess winning the Masters is as close as I’m going to get.” Fuzzy Zoeller
- Why did they kick Tarzan out of The Masters?… He screamed with every swing.
- The Masters is sometimes falls on Easter… the most popular holes that year are #11, #12 and #13, Amen corner.
- Masters Hole #12 Where do musicians like to watch the Masters?… Hole #12, Golden Bell.
- Masters Hole #13 What is a favorite golf hole for florists?… Azalea at Augusta National Golf Course.
- Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants to the Masters?… In case he got a hole-in-one, he wanted to be double sure!
- Hole #14 Where do golfers at the Masters stop for an egg roll?… Hole #14, Chinese Fir.
- What do you call a Master golfer who gets a birdie on every hole?… A master tweeter!
- What’s a golfer’s favorite letter at the Masters?… “Tee.”
- Golf is a game where the ball lies poorly & the golfers lie well.
- Why did the golfer bring string to the Masters?… To tie up the competition!
- What’s a golfer’s favorite snack during the Masters?… A hole-in-one-doughnut!
- Where do golfers at the Masters like to park?…. Magnolia Lane.
- Why did the golfer bring two sets of gloves?… In case he got a hole-in-one.
- Why did the golfer have an extra pair of pants at The Masters?… In case he got a hole-in-one.
- The Masters is sometimes falls on Holy Thursday… the most popular holes that year are #11, #12 and #13. (Amen Corner)
- Why did Tarzan spend so much time on the golf course before The Masters?… He was perfecting his swing.
- Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know how to tell a good Masters knock-knock joke?
- Hole #6: What is the favorite golf hole of an arborist?… Juniper.
- Masters Hole #15 What hole at the Master’s really bothers firemen?… Hole 15 Fire Thorn.
- Where does an AP US History teacher like to watch the Masters?… Eisenhower Tree!
- What’s a golfer’s favorite dance at the Masters?… The swing dance!
- Golf: a game where you yell fore, you get six, and you write five.
- Why do Augusta National golf courses get hot after Masters?… Because all of the fans have left.
- Why does the golfer carry two shirts to The Masters?… In case he gets a hole in one.
- Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Noah… Noah, who?… Noah good joke about The Masters?
- What do you call a golfer who can’t keep his ball on the fairway?… A hooker!
- Where do golfers go to dance after The Masters?… The golf ball.
- Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know any good Masters knock knock jokes?
- Ike’s Pond… the best place to fish at the Masters.
- Ike’s Pond… the best place to swim at the Masters.
- Brand new golf balls are attracted to water, and the power of the attraction is in direct proportion to how much the balls cost.
- The higher a golfer’s handicap, the more likely he is to try to tell you what you’re doing wrong.
- Why do WWI veterans dislike golf?… They always end up in the bunker.
- The golfer called one of the caddies and said, “I want a caddie who can count and keep the score. What’s 3 and 4 and 5 add up to?” “11 sir,” said the caddie. “Good, you’ll do perfectly.”
- What’s the problem with my golf game?… You’re standing too close to the ball … after you’ve hit it.
- My golf game is so bad I had to have my ball retriever regripped.
- When is the course too wet to play golf?… When your golf cart capsizes.
- Golfer: “I’d move heaven and earth to break 100 on this course.” Caddie: “Try heaven. You’ve already moved most of the earth.”
- A good golf partner is one who’s always a little bit worse than you are.
- If your opponent has trouble remembering whether he shot a six or a seven, it means he probably shot an eight.
- Golf balls are like eggs. They’re white, they are sold by the dozen, and a week later you have to buy more.
- What’s the easiest shot in golf?… Your fourth putt.
- I’m ready to go for this par-5 green in two, but there’s still a group on the green. What should I do?… Well, you have two options: you can go ahead and shank it right now, or wait for the green to clear and then top the ball half way there