Top 50 U2 Jokes

by | Feb 20, 2026 | Dads, Latest News, School Jokes | 0 comments

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  1. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Irish… Irish who?… Irish we have the #1 page for U2 jokes!
  2. Ash Wednesday Jokes: Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe, who?… Canoe believe U2 released on February 18th, 2026 “Days of Ash” U2 SURPRISE-DROP POLITICALLY CHARGED ‘DAYS OF ASH’ EP WITH SIX NEW SONGS?
  3. St. Patrick’s Day Jokes: Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Irish… Irish who?… Irish I could have seen the St. Patrick’s Day concert in Boston on March 17, 1992.
  4. Ash Wednesday Jokes: U2 released on February 18th, 2026 “Days of Ash.”… Is this the unofficial or official EP of Ash Wednesday?
  5. Ash Wednesday Jokes: U2 released on February 18th, 2026 “Days of Ash.”… Is this the unofficial or official song of Ash Wednesday?
  6. What you two song reminds me of my Nana‘s cooking? Seconds
  7. U2 song American obituary deadly
  8. Walk to water
  9. I will follow the unofficial song of follow the leader
  10. What U2 song is on a magicians playlist?… Mysterious Ways
  11. Who is a geologist’s favorite U2 DJ?… Rocky” O’Riordan
  12. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Irish… Irish, who?… Irish I could have seen U2 performance at Live Aid at Wembley Stadium.
  13. What U2 band member should you never ask to the homecoming dance?… BoNO!
  14. canoe believe there were two overtime games in the men’s hockey quarterfinals?
  15. Who is a defensive end’s favorite member of you too?… The Edge.
  16. Who is the defensive coordinator’s favorite U2 member?… The Edge.
  17. U2’s song Bad… it’s so good!
  18. U2’s performance of Bad at Live Aid… was so good.
  19. We hope our U2 jokes will get the band members Dublin over with laughter.
  20. I saw U2 three times during the Joshua Tree tour… Irish I saw them more.
  21. Where is the geologist favorite place to see U2?… Red rocks
  22. What U2 song goes nice with a piece of fish and a glass of Chardonnay?… Lemon.
  23. I’ve heard that U2 has never paid legal any legal fees… Their lawyers all work pro-Bono.   
  24. Staring at the Sun.
  25. My lawyer dumped me after I said I hated U2…. He was working under a Pro Bono agreement.     
  26. Did you know Stevie Nicks wrote a song about the U2 guitarist’s teen years?… Edge of Seventeen.  
  27. U2 is the most beloved band. Every time someone hears “I love you” they reply “I love U2.”      
  28. Did you hear that the band U2 gave away a free concert?… Apparently, the crowd was very Pro Bono.     
  29. My lawyer is a U2 fan… So he was glad to represent them in a court case pro Bono.
  30. Did anyone get a U2 Satellite Navigation System for Christmas?… I am returning my one, The Streets have no name. And I still haven’t found what I am looking for.      
  31. I met U2 once.. I stood very close to the Edge.      
  32. Having U2 as a client would be the worst… All the work is pro bono.      
  33. U2 are one of Ireland’s most successful bands. Or according to their tax returns, one of Netherlands’ least successful hardware store owners.      
  34. I was U2’s bass player in their early days One night I shoved Bono into our guitar player while he was doing a solo, and after tumbling over him, he got up and stabbed me with his pocketknife. I thought that was a bit extreme, but guess I shouldn’t have pushed him over The Edge.      
  35. My friend who absolutely loves U2 just passed the BAR exam… He says everything he does now will be Pro Bono      
  36. The U2 spy plane took many pictures during its military career. But it still hasn’t found what it’s looking for.      
  37. Did you hear about the lawyer who refused to represent U2 in court?… He didn’t want to work pro-Bono      
  38. My friend and I were backstage with band U2 and two other people. I said “hey look, I’m here with U2, you two, and you too!”      
  39. U2 just announced a world tour. Are they going to sell tickets, or just break into my living room and start playing?      
  40. How does U2 spell color/colour? With or Without U    
  41. The band U2 went to the premiere of the new Mr. Rogers film… …because it’s a Beautiful Day in the neighborhood.      
  42. I learned that Bono from U2 holds the record for most private investigators hired to recover a lost heirloom. To this day he still hasn’t found what he’s looking for.      
  43. Bought a new sat nav made by the band U2, bloody things useless. The streets have no names      
  44. I was going to sue U2 for stealing one of my songs But I found out my lawyer was pro-bono.      
  45. I don’t get why all these people praise lawyers just for being U2 fans… Suddenly they’re special for taking on Pro-Bono cases?      
  46. What was U2’s lawyer’s hourly rate?… Nothing, he was pro-Bono      
  47. Lawyers must be pretty big fans of the legendary Irish rock band U2… Almost all of them go on about all the pro-Bono things that they do.      
  48. You guys hear that Bono fell off the stage at the big U2 concert last night?… He got a little too close to the edge.      
  49. If the FBI needs to get into someones’s iPhone without permission.. They should just call U2 and ask how they did it.      
  50. U2 got sued over copyright and didn’t have money to afford a lawyer. The ACLU stepped in for free and they won the case. It was pro Bono.      
  51. I told my girl I love you. She said I love U2. That was kind of depressing. She’s talking about music at this vulnerable moment. So I broke up with her.      
  52.  Why does Bono always say ‘I love you’ first? Because it’s the only time he gets to hear someone say: I love U2      
  53. I tried to get a lawyer pro bono but found it impossible… Every one I contacted hated U2      
  54. I just recieved the worst gift of all time… .. A Bonnie Tyler sat nav. Keeps on telling me to “turn around” And every now and then it falls apart. Still, not as bad as the U2 one, where the streets have no names, and I still haven’t found what I’m looking for.      
  55. When my friend turned 40 I sent him a CD in the mail, UB40 A month later on my 40th I received a CD in the mail from him, U2      
  56. What did Bono say when he called his kids for dinner and they didn’t come? “I still haven’t found who I’m cooking for!”
  57. Bono returns to the German doctor for a checkup after his back surgery. The doctor asks, “Is it getting better? Or do you feel the same
  58. Bono and The Edge walk into a bar … Barman says “not U2 again”
  59. What do you call a quartet of sheep that play post punk music? Ewe2.
  60. I got a U2 monopoly but it sucked because the streets have no name.
  61. Why did Bono fall off stage? He stood too close to the edge
  62. A British songwriter is suing U2, claiming that the band stole one of his songs. Though I don’t like the songwriter’s chances, because his lawyer is working Pro Bono. 
  63. “Every time I clap my hands, a child in Africa dies of starvation.” Fan in the crowd: “for bloody sakes then, stop clapping your hands!!!
  64. What kind of lawyers praise U2? A: Pro Bono lawyers.
  65. Why are they called U2? A: Because everyone knows it’s Bono, the Edge and…er…you two.