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Google Search “101 Nutcracker Jokes”
- December Knock Knock Jokes: Knock knock?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best jokes about the Nutcracker.
- Tea Jokes: What kind of tea should you drink when watching the Nutcracker?… Chai-kovsksy.
- Why did the ballet instructor make her students practice The Nutcracker so often?… To keep them on their toes.
- What do you call sheep who perform The Nutcracker?… Baaaah-lerinas.
- World Geography Jokes: What is the most painful Russian dance?… Tchaikovsky’s The Nutcracker.
- Marriage Jokes: Well, I guess we are going to see “The Nutcracker” this Christmas!… My in-laws, not the play.
- Middle School Jokes The middle school class was going to see the Nutcracker at Wang Center and they asked each individual kid if he or she wanted to go… One girl declined, saying, “I could see my squirrel do it.”
- What did the nutcracker say to the chestnut?… “You’re busted.”
- What show does a squirrel see on Christmas Day?… The Nutcracker.
- Elf Jokes: What did the elves call Santa when he accidentally stepped on a bag of cashews?… A nutcracker.
- How do you find a Nutcracker?… Act like a walnut!
- 101 Elephant Jokes: What are the biggest Nutcrackers?… Elephants!
- What did dad say about the nut cracker he got for Christmas?… “This nutcracker’s suite!”
- What do you call an automatic Nutcracker?… A squirrel.
- What did the pecan say to the Nutcracker?… Nothing… pecans can’t talk!
- Where can you find vintage Nutcrackers?… The internut.
- Why did the walnut cross the road?… To get away from the Nutcracker.
- Donut Jokes: What nut can’t you open with a Nutcracker?… A donut.
- Why can’t dogs perform The Nutcracker?… They have two left feet…
- December Knock Knock Jokes: Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know how to tell a good nutcracker knock-knock joke?
- What ballet are men afraid of?… The Nutcracker.
- Who is the nutcracker’s favorite hero?… Captain Crunch.
- What’s a squirrel’s favorite Christmas tradition?… The Nutcracker.
- What’s a nutcracker’s favorite food?… Crackers. They’re nuts for them.
- Why did the nutcracker cross the road?… To get his nuts.
- Which ballet is the most uncomfortable for guys to have to sit through?… The Nutcracker.
- December Knock Knock Jokes: Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know any good nutcracker knock knock jokes?
- What did the peanut tell the nutcracker?… “You crack me up.”
- What is the worst Christmas present for men?… A nutcracker.
- Lobster Jokes: What do you call a lobster with a nutcracker?… A castration crustacean.
- Marriage Jokes: Why did the husband buy his wife a nutcracker for Christmas?… He figured after all these years breaking his balls manually she deserves it.
- What happens when you kick your cousin in the groin at Christmas?… From then onwards, they will call you, “Nutcracker.”
- Karate Jokes: There was a man who became the karate champion on Christmas Day… So he decided to go by the name, “The Nutcracker.”
- Why does your mom guard the house?… Because she is a nutcracker.
- What do you call a nutcracker whose pants keep falling down?… A buttcracker.
- Marriage Jokes: Many years ago, I picked up some walnuts and a nutcracker at Walmart… But enough about where I met my wife.
- Marriage Jokes: I went to the nutcracker today… Now I can’t have children.
- Marriage Jokes: Well, I guess we are going to see “The Nutcracker” on Saturday!… My mother-in-law, not the play!
- Why was the nutcracker good at spelling?… He could break words up.
- Why did the nutcracker go camping?… He liked the crackling fire.
- Why did the nutcracker go to the doctor?… He felt a little cracked.
- Why did the nutcracker go to the therapist?… He felt a little cracked.
- What do you call a nutcracker that’s funny?… A crack-up.
- Why did the nutcracker join the soldiers?… He already had the uniform.
- Why don’t nutcrackers hide?… Because they break too easily.
- What snack does a nutcracker love?… Anything crunchy.
- Why did the squirrel invite the nutcracker?… To help open hard nuts.
- Why was the nutcracker calm?… He could handle pressure.
- Why does the nutcracker like Christmas songs?… Because they make him crack a smile.
- What movie does a nutcracker love?… “Crack to the Future.”
- Why don’t nutcrackers tell secrets?… They always slip out.
- Nutcracker Pun: Nutcrackers love football…. especially crack back.
- What song do nutcrackers sing at Christmas?… “Crack the Halls.”
- Why was the nutcracker a good friend?… He always breaks things down.
- What do you call a nutcracker that dances?… A nut-shaker.
- Why was the nutcracker the party hero?… He cracked the ice.
- Why was the nutcracker good at cards?… He never changed his face.
- Why don’t nutcrackers like numbers?… Too much crunching.
- What happened when the nutcracker got a raise?… He shell-ebrated.
- Why was the nutcracker so serious?… Breaking nuts is hard work.
- What do you call a stylish nutcracker?… A sharp cracker.
- Why did the nutcracker go to the zoo?… To see elephants eat peanuts.
- Why don’t nutcrackers get bored?… They keep cracking things.
- What do you call a nutcracker at a comedy show?… A joke-cracker.
- Why don’t nutcrackers gossip?… They don’t want to break trust.
- What’s a nutcracker’s favorite class?… History. It’s crunch time.
- Why did the nutcracker become a detective?… He loved cracking cases.
- What do nutcrackers eat for breakfast?… Crunchy cereal.
- What’s the nutcracker’s favorite holiday tune?… “Crackin’ Around the Christmas Tree.”
- Why did Santa hire the nutcracker?… To deal with tough treats.
- What did the nutcracker tell the gingerbread man?… “Don’t worry, I only crack nuts.”
- Why was the nutcracker funny at the party?… Because he cracked jokes all night.
- Why did the nutcracker sit by the fire?… To stay warm and crack chestnuts.
- What did the Christmas tree tell the nutcracker?… “Stop cracking near my roots!”
- Why do nutcrackers love stockings?… They’re full of crunchy surprises.
- What’s the nutcracker’s favorite holiday movie?… His own “The Nutcracker.”
- Why did Rudolph stay away from the nutcracker?… He didn’t want to get cracked up.
- How does a nutcracker decorate his house?… With bright, crackling lights.
- What did the snowman tell the nutcracker?… “Don’t crack me, I’m fragile!”
- Why was the nutcracker busy at dinner?… Too many nuts to open.
- What dessert does the nutcracker enjoy?… Fruitcake it’s tough and chewy.
- Why does the nutcracker love Christmas morning?… Because the nuts are ready.
- How does a nutcracker ring in the New Year?… By cracking at midnight.
- What Christmas song does the nutcracker dislike?… “Silent Night”…. he prefers noise.
- Why did the nutcracker stand near Santa’s sleigh?… To help open gifts faster.
- What drink does the nutcracker love?… Hot cocoa with nuts.
- What do nutcrackers call Christmas Eve?… Crunchmas Eve.
- Why is a nutcracker a great present?… Because he’s full of bite.
- What do nutcrackers hang on their doors?… Nut wreaths.
- Why did the nutcracker dance on Christmas?… The music cracked him up.
- What cookie does the nutcracker love?… Almond cookies.
- What do nutcrackers say instead of “Merry Christmas?”… “Cracky Christmas!”
- Why did Santa laugh at the nutcracker?… He split his sides.
- What did Mrs. Claus tell the nutcracker?… “You always crack me up.”
- Why did the nutcracker go to school?… To learn to crack problems.
- What subject does a nutcracker like?… Crunch-math.
- What does the nutcracker eat for lunch?… A peanut butter sandwich.
- Why was the nutcracker smart?… He always cracked the answer.
- Why did the nutcracker major in computer science?… He always cracked the code.
- What game does a nutcracker play?… Hide and crack.
- Why did the nutcracker bring a ladder?… To grab high nuts.