My Town Tutors is a great resource for parents & teachers. Check out our Guest Blogs for Education, Parents, Travel, Tutoring, Sports, Music and College.
Google Search “101 Massachusetts Jokes”
- Knock knock?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have wicked pissah Massachusetts jokes.
- Yes, I am from Massachusetts. No I’m not going to pahk the cah in Hahvahd yahd!
- If you’re wicked smaht… you’ll never get cahded at the packie!
- 49 States “Please pass the remote” Massachusetts: “Gimme the Clickah!”
- If you’re wicked smaht… You go to Harvard!
- If you’re from Boston… You’ll know who the cahdnal is & how to take the T to JP
- The Boston Tea Party was a real brew-ha-ha!
- Boston Celtics Jokes: What famous Southern Rock anthem is the same as the Boston Celtics offense during the 1980s… Free Bird. (Massachusetts Jokes)
- I fell in love with the foliage in Massachusetts… It really leaves a lasting impression!
- Massachusetts Movie Review of Wicked: “Wicked Pissah!” (Wizard of Oz Jokes)
- Only in Massachusetts would there be a Dunkin Donuts next to a Dunkin Donuts.
- 49 States “In the Basement” Massachusetts: “Down Cellah!”
- What kind of music did the Pilgrims listen to?…Plymouth Rock! (Thanksgiving Jokes)
- I’m not YELLING! I am from Massachusetts. I am just wicked loud!
- Welcome to Massachusetts… Where the weather is made up and the seasons do not matter.
- Boston Marathon Jokes: What is the worst US city to run a marathon?… Boston. It is the height of pollen season and it is in Mass “Achoo” setts.
- Don’t make me use my Boston accent!
- I’m never again donating a dime to any charity raising funds for finishing the Boston Marathon… They just take the money and run.
- Boston Celtics Jokes: 617 Day: The unofficial holiday of the Boston Celtics. (June 17th is the date the Celtics won the 2008 and 2024 NBA Titles.)
- Tourist: “Have you lived in Massachusetts all your life?” Local: “No, not yet.”
- Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe, who?… Canoe you name the Massachusetts holiday that coincides with the Boston Marathon? (Patriots Day)
- Boston Celtics Jokes: 1957, 1959, 1960, 1961, 1962, 1963, 1964, 1965, 1966, 1968, 1969, 1974, 1976, 1981, 1984, 1986, 2008, 2024... Banner years in Boston!
- Teacher: “More than 200 years ago, our forefathers defeated the British in the Revolutionary War.” Student: “Wow! They must have been pretty strong, four men defeating a whole army!” (4th of July Jokes)
- If April showers bring May flowers, what do Mayflowers bring?… Pilgrims (The Mayflower Ship) (Thanksgiving Jokes)
- Boston Marathon Jokes: What is the #1 marathon for cardiologists?… The Boston Marathon. They love Heartbreak Hill.
- What kind of tea did the American colonists thirst for?…Liberty! (4th of July Jokes)
- What did the colonists wear to the Boston Tea Party?…Tea-shirts. (4th of July Jokes)
- How do people in Boston vote?… Early and often!
- What did the Massachusetts flag say to the American flag?… Nothing. It waved! (Top Flag Day Jokes)
- Warning: Police are on the lookout for an overweight man who did not pay his entrance fee to the Boston Marathon… He is believed to be still on the run.
- How do you know you’re from Massachusetts?… When you believe using your car horn is an essential way of communication!
- Boston Marathon Jokes: Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe, who?… Canoe you believe in 2026 it will be the 130th Boston Marathon.
- I’m ‘wicked’ excited to explore Massachusetts!
- I told my friends I was going to Harvard, and they said, “That’s a smaaaaart move!”
- Boston Celtics Jokes: Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe tell me the how many NBA titles the Celtics have won? (NBA Champions)
- Boston Marathon Jokes: 2025 Boston Marathon: Kenya believe Sharon Lokedi won her 1st Boston Marathon AND broke the course record by 2 minutes and 30 seconds.
- Do you want to hear a joke about the Boston Marathon?…. Never mind… I’ll never finish it.
- If you’re wicked smaht… You go to MIT!
- Fenway Park is a grand slam of a place to enjoy baseball!
- Tourist: “Nice little town — so old and quaint. Must be a lot of odd characters around here, though, right?” Local: “Oh yes, quite a few. You see ’em around. But they’re mostly gone after Labor Day.”
- Do you know what would be a great theme song for One Boston Day?… ONE by U2. Boston loves U2 and U2 loves Boston.
- I wanted to go fishing in Cape Cod… but I couldn’t find my reel motivation.
- I told my friend I was going to Cape Cod, and he said, “Seas the day!”
- Why did the Cape Cod crab never share its food?… Because it was a little shellfish!
- If you’re wicked smaht… You go to BC!
- Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe the name the #1 college hockey regular season tournament held in Boston, Massachusetts?
- Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe the name the 4 colleges that compete in #1 college hockey regular season tournament held in Boston, Massachusetts?
- I don’t win marathons because I’m lucky… I win because I take public transportation, just take like Rosie Ruiz.
- I told my friend I was going to the Charles River. They said, “Don’t get too tide up in the current events!”
- Why did the Boston tea party get out of hand?… Because everyone was just trying to brew up some fun!
- Why did the scarecrow win an award in Massachusetts?… Because he was outstanding in his field!
- When autumn arrives… Massachusetts gets its “leaf” on!
- The apples in Massachusetts said they were a-peeling to everyone this fall!
- Autumn in Massachusetts is un-be-leaf-able with all the colors around!
- The Massachusetts corn was so sweet… it made my heart pop!
- At the Museum of Fine Arts, you’re bound to draw some inspiration from the exhibits!
- I love Massachusetts in the fall—it’s “berry” nice to see all the harvests!
- What did one Massachusetts leaf say to the other?… “I’m falling for you!”
- Massachusetts in autumn is like a fine wine… it just gets better with age!
- What’s a Massachusetts fisherman’s favorite type of music?… Anything with a wicked good bass line!
- Why did the Patriots fan bring a ladder to the game?… To reach new heights.
- What did the witch say at the Salem trials?… “I’m just here for the ‘spell’-binding stories!”
- Why did the Boston Red Sox bring a ladder to the game?… They wanted to reach new heights in the standings!
- The Berkshires are a peak experience for nature lovers!
- If you visit Plymouth Rock, just remember: it’s a solid foundation for American history!
- The Boston Marathon is a great event… but it really gets me running in circles!
- The hockey coach from Massachusetts told his team to stay focused, but they just kept getting “checked” out!
- The baseball player from Boston was always in a good mood… he had a real “batter” outlook on life!
- Why did the football player start a gardening business?… He wanted to “tackle” the competition!
- The Massachusetts golfer always wore a smile… he knew how to “putt” on a happy face!
- Why did the lacrosse player get a promotion?… He always “passed” the ball with flying colors!
- The tennis player from Massachusetts had a great sense of humor… she was always “serving” up laughs!
- What do you call a Massachusetts museum that’s always busy?… A “Plymouth” of activity!
- Why was the Bay State so good at telling stories?… Because it had a lot of “tales” from the Bay!
- I’m just ‘pasta’-tively in love with the Italian food around here!
- When I tried the baked beans… I knew I was in for a ‘bean’-anza of flavor!
- The local apples are ‘a-peeling’ and perfect for cider!
- This place serves up a ‘wicked’ good slice of pizza!
- The cranberry harvest is truly ‘berry’ impressive!
- Why did the Massachusetts farmer love history?… He enjoyed “cultivating” the past!
- What did the historian say about the Massachusetts bay?… “It’s a shore thing when it comes to rich history!”
- Don’t leaf me hanging… let’s explore the Foliage Trail!
- I’m feeling a little crabby… but a trip to Cape Cod will shell-evate my mood!
- I can’t bear the thought of missing out on a hike in the Berkshires!
- This weather is un-be-leaf-able… perfect for a day at Walden Pond!
- I’m feeling tree-mendously excited about our camping trip in the Berkshires!
- I wood love to see the autumn colors in the Pioneer Valley!
- It’s a shore thing that we’ll have a whale of a time at Martha’s Vineyard!
- I’m on cloud wine after a day of exploring the Blue Hills!
- If you think Boston baked beans are a little too sweet… you’re just not *bean* open-minded!
- The Cape Cod beaches are so beautiful… they really shore know how to impress!
- When visiting the Freedom Trail, remember to walk this way to history!
- The Boston Tea Party was quite the brew-ha-haof its time!
- The history teacher in Massachusetts always told the best tales, but they could get a little revolutionary!
- The art teacher in Massachusetts always said, “Draw your own conclusions, but don’t color outside the lines!”
- The USS Constitution is a ship-shape way to learn about naval history!
- The ocean at Cape Cod was feeling blue… but it made waves of laughter anyway.
- If you get lost in Salem, just witch your direction to the nearest landmark!
- The Bay State may be small, but it sure packs a punch with its rich history!
- Don’t clam up when you’re at the New England Aquarium… it’s a *fin-tastic* experience!
- The Boston Public Garden is a blooming good spot for a leisurely stroll!