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Math Jokes for Elementary School
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Top Math Jokes, 101 Pi Day Jokes, & Top Elementary Jokes!
1. Why is 6 afraid of 7?… Because 7 8 (ate) 9.
2. Teacher: Why are you doing your multiplication on the floor? Student: You said we had to do it without tables! (Top Jokes for Math Teachers)
3. Why is a math book always unhappy?… Because it always has lots of problems. (Top Jokes for Math Teachers).
4. Teacher: If you have 5 people and only 4 apples, how would you divide them? Student: I’d ask someone to go get a knife and whoever was stupid enough to go wouldn’t get an apple.
5. Teacher: If I had ten apples in my right hand and nine in my left, what would I have?… Student: Huge hands! (Top Jokes for Math Teachers)
6. What happened to the plant in math class?… It grew square roots. (Top Jokes for Math Teachers)
7. What did the math classroom have instead of desks?… Times tables.
8. How did the little kids like learning addition?… They thought it was a real plus.
9. What did one math book say to the other?… Don’t bother me I’ve got my own problems!
10. How did the math teacher paint a picture?… By the numbers.
11. How far open were the windows in the math class?… Just a fraction.
12. If you had one dollar and you asked your father for another, how many dollars would you have?… One dollar.
13. How can you make seven even?… Take away the “s”!
14. What does the zero say to the the eight?… Nice belt!
15. How did the student get the answer to ten minus ten?… He zeroed in on it.
16. 3.14% of Sailors are PI rates! (Pi Day Jokes & Top Pirate Jokes)
17. What is the official animal of Pi Day?… the PI – thon! (101 Pi Day Jokes)
18. Where can you buy a ruler that is 3 feet long?… At a yard sale.
19. Why couldn’t the seven and the ten get married?… They were under eighteen.
20. How many eggs can you put in an empty basket? … Only one, after that the basket is not empty. (Top Easter Jokes)
21. Teacher: How much is half of 8? Student: Up and down or across? Teacher: What do you mean ? Student: Well,up and down makes a 3 or across the middle leaves a 0.
22. What do you get when you cross geometry with McDonalds?… A plane cheeseburger.
23. Why was the math student so bad at decimals?… She couldn’t get the point.
24. What kind of tree does a math teacher climb?… Geometry. (Top Geometry Jokes)
25. What would you get if you crossed a dog and a calculator?… A friend you can count on.
26. What kind of meals do math teachers eat?… Square meals!
27. What is a mathematician’s favorite dessert?… Pi!
28. Teacher:: Remember, class, you can’t add apples and oranges. Student: My mother does it all the time. She calls it fruit cocktail.
29. Why does nobody talk to circles?… Because there is no point! (Top Geometry Jokes)
30. Why couldn’t the math student get any attention?… He didn’t count.
31. Teacher: Now class, whatever I ask, I want you to all answer at once. How much is six plus 4? Class: At once!
32. What do geometry teachers have on their floors?… Area rugs. (Top Geometry Jokes)
33. What do you have to know to get top grades in geometry?… All the angles! (Top Geometry Jokes)
34. Which member of royalty is best at math?… The Count. (The Count counts the digits of Pi.)
35. Teacher: If you eat two thirds of a pie, what do you have left? Student:An angry mother. (Top Mother’s Day Jokes)
36. Teacher: Let X equal the unknown quantity. Now, if X + 10 = 20, and X – 5 = 5, what is X? Student: As far as I’m concerned, it’s still the unknown quantity.
37. Teacher: If 1+1=2 and 2+2=4, what is 4+4? Student: That’s not fair; you answer the easy ones and leave us with the hard one!
38. Decimals have a point.
39. How does a mathematician plow his fields?… With a protractor.
40. How do you plow underground fields?… With a subtractor.
41. Teacher: If you had two dimes and your brother gave you a nickel, how much money would you have? Student: Twenty cents. Teacher:: You don’t know your mathematics. Student: You don’t know my brother.
42. Why did the boy eat his math homework?… Because the teacher told him it was a piece of cake.
43. What did the bee say when it solved the problem?… “Hive got it!”
44. Teacher: How do you find the square root of 144? Student: I generally ask someone who’s smarter than I am.
45. What kind of pliers do you use in arithmetic?… Multipliers!
46. Teacher: What’s 2 and 2? Student: 4. Teacher: That’s good. Student: Good? That’s perfect!
47. What shape is usually waiting for you at Stabucks?… A line. (Top Geometry Jokes)
48. What is a smart bird’s favorite type of math?… owl-gebra! (Top Geometry Jokes)
49. Who invented fractions?… Henry the Eighth!
50. What do you call an arithmetic teacher who can make numbers disappear?… A mathemagician.
51. If there are ten cats in a boat and one jumps out, how many are left?… None; they were all copycats!
52. Why did the two 4’s skip lunch?… They already 8!
53. Why is a geometry book always unhappy?… Because it always has lots of problems. (Top Geometry Jokes)
54. Teacher: Can you count from 1 to 20? Student: I’m not sure. How about if I just count from 1 to 10 twice?
55. Teacher: If you had 36 cents in one pocket and 59 cents in the other pocket, what would you have? Student: Somebody else’s pants.
56. How are you doing in arithmetic?… I’ve learned to add up the zeros, but the numbers are still giving me trouble.
57. What makes arithmetic hard work?… All those numerals you have to carry.
58. What did the acorn say when he grew up?… Gee, I’m A Tree! (Top Geometry Jokes)
59. What do you call people who like tractors?… Protractors.
60. What did the baby tree say when it looked in a mirror?… Gee-Om-A-Tree (Top Geometry Jokes)
61. How is the moon like a dollar?… They both have 4 quarters. (Full Moon Names)
62. What goes up and never comes down?… Your Age. (101 Grandparents Quotes)
63. What was T. rex’s favorite number?… Eight!
64. What do you call an empty parrot cage?… Polygon.
65. Why are diapers like 100 dollar bills?… They need to be changed.
66. When things go wrong, what can you always count on?… Your fingers.
67. Why is the longest human nose on record only 11 inches long?… Otherwise it would be a foot.
68. What do mathematicians eat on Halloween?… Pumpkin Pi. (101 Pi Day Jokes)
69. Why didn’t the quarter roll down the hill with the nickel?… Because it had more cents.
70. What do you call a crushed angle?…. A Rectangle (wrecked angle). (Top Geometry Jokes)
71. Why did I divide sin by tan?… Just cos.
72. Why did the obtuse angle go to the beach?… because it was over 90 degrees. (Top Summer Jokes)
73. What do you call an angle which is adorable?… acute angle.
74. What do you call male friends who love math?… alge “bros” (Top Algebra Jokes)
75. What do you call 144 cockroaches?… Gross.
76. Who invented the Round Table?… Sir Cumference.
77. Which triangles are the coldest?… Ice-sosceles triangles. (Top Winter Jokes)
78. What did one geometry book say to the other?… Don’t bother me I’ve got my own problems!
79. What does the little mermaid wear?… An algae-bra. (Top Algebra Jokes)
80. Did you hear the joke about the statistician?… Probably.
81. What wild animal is good at calculus?… The tangent lion.
82. Why was the Calculus teacher bad at baseball?… He was better at fitting curves than hitting them. (Top Baseball Jokes)
83. Who invented algebra?… A Clever X-pert.
84. Why won’t Goldilocks drink a glass of water with 8 pieces of ice in it?… It’s too cubed.
85. What do you get when you cross an algebra class with the prom?… The quadratic formal.
86. Why is an algebra book always unhappy?… Because it always has lots of problems.
87. What geometric figure is like a lost parrot?… A polygon!
88. How does a ghost solve a quadratic equation?… By completing the scare. (Top Halloween Jokes)
89. Why did the doctor send the expression to a psychiatrist?… Because it wasn’t rational. (Top Psychology Jokes)
90. Do you know a statistics joke?… Probably, but it’s mean!
91. What do you call a snake after it drinks three cups of coffee?… A hyper boa.
92. What is Ho cubed?… HoHoHo (Christmas Trivia & Christmas Jokes)
93. How can you tell when a factorial is enthusiastic?… It’s always enthusiastic – it has an exclamation point!
94. Why did the girl wear glasses during math class?… Because it improves di-vison!
95. Surgeon: Nurse! I have so many patients! Who do I work on first? Nurse: Simple. Use the order of operations.
96. Teacher: Your behavior reminds me of square root of 2? Student: Why? Teacher:Because its’ completely irrational. (Top Teacher Jokes)
97. Student: The artist Picasso must have been really good at algebra. Teacher: Why do you say that? Student: He was a famous cubist, so he probably had to do a lot of factoring. (Top Teacher Jokes)
98. Teacher: Why did your mother and father do your algebra homework? Student: They really understand parent functions. (Top Teacher Jokes)
99. Why are you drumming on your algebra book with two big sticks?… Because we are studying log rhythms.
100. How can a fisherman determine how many fish he needs to catch to make a profit?… By using a cod-ratic inequality. (Top Summer Jokes & Top Massachusetts Jokes)
101. A circle is just a round straight line with a hole in the middle.
102. How do you know that your dentist studied algebra?… She said all that candy gave me exponential decay.
103. What do you call a teapot of boiling water on top of Mount Everest?… A high-pot-in-use (Top Geometry Jokes)
104. Why do plants hate math?… Because it gives them square roots.
105. Why is a calculus book always unhappy?… Because it always has lots of problems. (Top Calculus Jokes)
106. How can you make time fly?… Throw a clock out the window!
107. Without geometry, life is pointless.
108. Why are misers good math teachers?… They know how to make every penny count!
109. You don’t know your arithmetic… You don’t know my father!
110. A daughter stood quietly as her father examined her report card. “What is this 45 in math?” asked her father. “I think that’s the size of the class,” she said quickly!
111. If I had five coconuts and I gave you three, how many would I have left?… I don’t know. Why not?… In our school we do all our arithmetic in apples and oranges.
112. If I had seven oranges in one hand and eight oranges in the other, what would I have?… Big hands!
113. If you got $10 from 10 people, what would you have?… A new bike!
114. Why was the maths book unhappy?… It had too many problems!
115. Teacher: If I gave you three rabbits today and five rabbits tomorrow, how many rabbits would you have? Student: Nine. Teacher: That’s not right, you’d have eight. Student: No, Teacher, I’d have nine. I already have one rabbit at home!
116. Teacher: If you add 3452 and 3096, then divide the answer by 4 and multiply by 6, what would you get? Student: The wrong answer.
117. “Our teacher has a bad memory. For three days she asked us how much is two and two. We told her it was four. But she still doesn’t know. Today she asked us again!”
118. What are 12 and 14?… Numbers
119. Birds on the mountain, Fish in the sea, How you passed math, Is a mystery to me.
120. Son: I got 100 in school today. Mother: Wonderful. What did you get 100 in? Son: Two things: I got 50 in Spelling and 50 in History. (Top Social Studies Jokes)
121. Teacher: Take 932 from 1,439. What is the difference? Student: That’s what I say; what’s the difference?
122. Why is a dog with a lame leg like adding 6 and 7?… He puts down the three and carries the one.
123. What animal is best at math?… Rabbits; they multiply fastest!
124. I failed every subject except for algebra…. How did you keep from failing that?… I didn’t take algebra!
125. Teacher: Did you parents help you with these homework problems? Pupil: No I got them all wrong by myself!
126. Student: Teacher, I can’t solve this problem. Teacher: Any five year old should be able to solve this one. Student: No wonder I can’t do it then; I’m nearly ten!
127. Teacher: Today we’re studying percentages. If there are ten questions on a quiz and you get ten correct, what do you get? Student: Accused of cheating.
128. Why did the multiplication table get in trouble with the girls?… He was a two timer.
129. What did the math teacher order for dinner?… Cubed steak.
130. What did the math teacher order for dessert?… Pi.
131. If a train is traveling in one direction at 50 miles per hour and another train is coming towards it at 25 miles per hour, when will they meet?… Sooner than they want to.
132. What do you call it when geometry teachers use bad language?… Sphering (swearing).
133. He said she was average because he was mean.
134. What has eight legs and eight eyes?… Eight pirates!
135. There are 10 types of mathematicians. Those who know binary and those who don’t.
136. Why was the math book sad?… Because it had too many problems!
137. What snakes are good at doing sums?… Adders.
138. A woman has seven daughters, and each daughter has a brother. How many children does the woman have all together?… She has eight children!
More jokes:
March 14, 2016
Teacher Jokes: Pi Day Jokes for Teachers
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Pi Day Jokes (26)
1. 3.14% of Sailors are PI rates! (Top Pirate Jokes)
2. What is a math teacher’s favorite dessert?… Pi! (Find a U.S. math teacher who tutors!)
3. What is the ideal number of pieces to cut a pie into?… 3.14
4. Mathematician: “Pi r squared” Baker:” No! Pies are round, cakes are square!
5. How many pastry chefs does it take to make a pie?… 3.14.
6. In Alaska, where it gets very cold, pi is only 3.00. As you know, everything shrinks in the cold. They call it Eskimo pi.
7. The roundest knight at King Arthur’s was Sir Cumference… He ate too much Pi!
8. What is the official animal of Pi Day?… the PI – thon!
9. The worst thing about getting hit in the face with pi is that it never ends.
10. Never talk to pi. He’ll go on forever.
11. I just saw the movie American Pi. I gave it a rating of 3.14.
12. What is 1.57?… Half a pie
13. What do you get when you cut a jack o’lantern by its diameter?… Pumpkin Pi! (Top Halloween Jokes)
14. What do you get when you take green cheese and divide its circumference by its diameter?… Moon Pi.
15. What do you get when you take the sun and divide its circumference by its diameter?… Pi in the sky.
16. What was Sir Isaac Newton’s favorite dessert?… Apple pi!
17. What do we get when we take the object and order the rim by the diameter?…Pi in the sky by and by.
18. What do you get if you divide the circumference of a bowl of ice cream by its diameter?… Pi a’la mode.
19. Come to the nerd side, we have pi!
20. How far can you recite pi?… Cherry, Apple, Pecan, Blueberry…
21. What famous private investigator solves math problem?… Magnum PI
22. What do you get when you take a bovine and divide its circumference by its diameter?… A cow pi.
23. A mathematician, a physicist, and an engineer are all given identicalrubber balls and told to find the volume. They are given anything theywant to measure it, and have all the time they need. The mathematician pulls out a measuring tape and records the circumference. He then divides by two times pi to get the radius, cubes that, multiplies by pi again, and then multiplies by four-thirds and thereby calculates the volume.The physicist gets a bucket of water, places 1.00000 gallons of water in the bucket, drops in the ball, and measures the displacement to six significant figures. And the engineer? He writes down the serial number of the ball, and looks it up.
24. Albert Einstein‘s birthday was on Pi Day — March 14, 1879. Perhaps he served pie for his birthday instead of cake.
25. What do you get when you take a native Alaskan and divide its circumference by its diameter?… Eskimo pi.
26. Several Experts Several experts were all posed the following question: What is pi?
- The engineer said: “It is approximately 3 and 1/7″
- The physicist said: “It is 3.14159.”
- The mathematician thought a bit, and replied “It is equal to pi.”
- A nutritionist: “Pie is a healthy and delicious dessert!”
Math Riddles (14)
1. Why should you never mention the number 288 in front of anyone?… Because it is too gross (2 x 144 – two gross).
2. How is the moon like a dollar?… They both have 4 quarters.
3. How can you add eight 8′s to get the number 1,000? (only using addition) A: 888 +88 +8 +8 +8 = 1,000
4. How many eggs can you put in an empty basket? … Only one, after that the basket is not empty.
5. Where can you buy a ruler that is 3 feet long?… At a yard sale
6. When things go wrong, what can you always count on?… Your fingers.
7. What coin doubles in value when half is deducted?… A half dollar.
8. Why are diapers like 100 dollar bills?… They need to be changed.
9. What goes up and never comes down?… Your Age
10. Why is the longest human nose on record only 11 inches long?… Otherwise it would be a foot.
11. Why do they never serve beer at a math party?… Because you can’t drink and derive…
12. Why didn’t the quarter roll down the hill with the nickel?… Because it had more cents.
13. Why is 6 afraid of 7?… Because 7 8(ate) 9
14. What is a proof?… One-half percent of alcohol.
Geometry Jokes (33)
1. What do you call a teapot of boiling water on top of mount everest?… A high-pot-in-use
2. What do you call a crushed angle?…. A Rectangle (wrecked angle)
3. What did the baby tree say when it looked in a mirror?… Gee-Om-A-Tree.
4. What do you get when you cross geometry with McDonalds?… A plane cheeseburger.
5. Why did I divide sin by tan?… Just cos.
6. What shape is usually waiting for you at Stabucks?… A line.
7. Why did the obtuse angle go to the beach?… because it was over 90 degrees.
8. What do you get when you cross a mountain climber and a mosquito?…
9. Nothing! You know you can’t cross a scalar and a vector.
10. What did the acorn say when he grew up?… Gee, I’m A Tree!
11. Why does nobody talk to circles?… Because there is no point!
12. What do you call an angle which is adorable?… acute angle
13. What did the student say when the witch doctor removed his curse?… Hexagon
14. Who invented the Round Table?… Sir Cumference.
15. Which triangles are the coldest?… Ice-sosceles triangles.
16. What do people who whine a lot and 3 points have in common?… They are both coplaners
17. How many grams of protein are there in that slice of chocolate pie?… 3.142
18. What kind of tree does a math teacher climb?… Geometry
19. What do you call people who like tractors?… Protractors
20. Why were the similar triangles weighing themselves?… They were finding their scale.
21. Why won’t the circles invite the ellipses over for dinner?… They are too eccentric.
22. Why did the 30-60-90 triangle marry the 45-45-90 triangle?… They were right for each other.
23. Why is a geometry book always unhappy?… Because it always has lots of problems.
24. Why is Ms. Radian such a good reporter?… She covers the story from every angle.
25. Why couldn’t the angle get a loan?… His parents wouldn’t cosine
26. Where do circles, ellipses, hyperbolas and parabolas like to hang out in the summer?… Coney Island.
27. Why didn’t the chicken cross to the other side of the inequality?… It couldn’t get past the boundary line.
28. Q: What do you get if you divide the cirucmference of a jack-o-lantern by its diameter?… Pumpkin Pi
29. Why was the parent function upset with its child?… It was stretched to its limit.
30. What is a proof?.. One-half percent of alcohol.
31. Why do you rarely find mathematicians spending time at the beach?… Because they have sine and cosine to get a tan and don’t need the sun!
32. What did one geometry book say to the other?… Don’t bother me I’ve got my own problems!
33. What do you call a broken record?… A Decca-gone
Calculus Jokes (21)
1. Why do they never serve beer at a math party?… Because you can’t drink and derive…
2. Why won’t Goldilocks drink a glass of water with 8 pieces of ice in it? It’s too cubed.
3. What’s the integral of (1/cabin)d(cabin)?… A natural log cabin!
4. What is the first derivative of a cow?… Prime Rib!
5. What is the value of the contour integral around Western Europe?… Zero. Why?
6. Because all poles are in Eastern Europe!
7. How does a mathematician induce good behavior in her children?… “I’ve told you n times, I’ve told you n+1 times…”
8. What is polite and works for the phone company?… A deferential operator.
9. Why was the parent function upset with its child?… It was stretched to its limit.
10. Did you hear the joke about the statistician?… Probably
11. What wild animal is good at calculus?… The tangent lion.
12. Why is a calculus book always unhappy?… Because it always has lots of problems.
13. Why was the Calculus teacher bad at baseball?… He was better at fitting curves than hitting them.
14. Why was the function so bent out of shape?… It’s regression model was too tight a fit.
15. What is the integral of log cabin d cabin?…Log Cabin + sea = houseboat.
16. Why do you rarely find mathematicians spending time at the beach?… Because they have sine and cosine to get a tan and don’t need the sun!
17. What did one calculus book say to the other?… Don’t bother me I’ve got my own problems!
18. What’s yellow and equivalent to the Axiom of Choice?… Zorn’s Lemon.
19. Why did the algebra students throw bottles of hand cream across the classroom?… They were investigating projectile lotion.
20. What do you get if you cross an elephant with a zebra?… Elephant zebra sin theta.
21. Why is it that the more accuracy you demand from an interpolation function, the more expensive it becomes to compute?… That’s the Law of Spline Demand.
Algebra Jokes (22)
1. Why was the student afraid of the y-intercept?… She thought she’d be stung by the b.
2. Who invented algebra?… A Clever X-pert.
3. What do you call mall friends who love math? alge “bros”
4. Why won’t Goldilocks drink a glass of water with 8 pieces of ice in it?… It’s too cubed.
5. What do you get when you cross an algebra class with the prom?… The quadratic formal.
6. What do you get when you cross a mountain climber and a mosquito?… Nothing! You know you can’t cross a scalar and a vector.
7. Why is an algebra book always unhappy?… Because it always has lots of problems.
8. Why do you rarely find mathematicians spending time at the beach?… Because they have sine and cosine to get a tan and don’t need the sun!
9. What is purple and commutative?… An abelian grape
10. What shape is usually waiting for you at Stabucks?… A line.
11. Why did the relation need a math tutor? … It failed the vertical-line test.
12. How can a fisherman determine how many fish he needs to catch to make a profit?… By using a cod-ratic inequality.
13. Why did the imaginary number turn red?… It ran out of i-drops.
14. What does the little mermaid wear?… An algae-bra.
15. How does a ghost solve a quadratic equation?… By completing the scare.
16. What is a proof?… One-half percent of alcohol.
17. What did algebra math book say to the other?… Don’t bother me I’ve got my own problems!
18. What is the definition of a polar bear?… A rectangular bear after a coordinate transformation
19. Why did all the apples in the fruit bowl know each other?… They were core-relations.
20. Why was the matrix arrested?… Illegal entry.
21. What do you call a rodent with babies?… A quad-rat-ic parent.
22. What do you get when you cross a linebacker with a computer geek?… A linear programmer.
March 14, 2016
2016 Massachusetts MIAA Basketball Sectional Champs

My Town Tutors is making a huge commitment to be the #1 tutoring resource for parents and teachers in America. Our motto is “Teachers are great tutors!” Parents love the fact that every teacher in our directory is a teacher! Our 50 day challenge is designed to connect with teachers who tutor in all 50 states.
Read an article that explains why My Town Tutors is becoming the #1 resource for tutoring in America!
My Town Tutors is the #1 resource for teachers who tutor and parents looking for local teachers who tutor!

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Top Massachusetts jokes! Check out our list of Top Massachusetts High Schools, Middle Schools, Elementary Schools, and Athletic Directors.
Coaching Youth Basketball.
Top Massachusetts Jokes & Top Massachusetts Schools
MIAA State Tournament
Boys Basketball
North Division 1: Cambridge Rindge & Latin defeats Lowell 54 – 38.
North Division 2: New Mission defeats Brighton 70 – 67.
North Division 3: Bedford beats Lynnfield 65 – 62.
North Division 4: Pope John beats St. Mary’s 68 – 49.
South Division 1: CM beats Newton North 77 – 73.
South Division 2: Whitman-Hanson beats Randolph 56 – 51.
South Division 3: Bishop Stang beats Apponoquet 58 – 50.
South Division 4: Cathederal beats Cohasset 51 – 39.
Central Division 1: St. John’s beats Franklin.
Central Division 2: Concord-Carlilse beats Marlboro.
Central Division 3: Oxford beats Bartlett.
Central Division 4: Maynard beats Sutton.
West Division 1: Putnman beats Amherst.
West Division 2: Tantasqua beats Pittsfield.
West Division 3: Hoosac Valley beats Easthampton.
West Division 4: Hopkins Academy beats Quobog.
Girls Basketball
North Division 1: Woburn defeats Revere.
North Division 2: Watertown defeats Belmont.
North Division 3: Bishop Fenwick defeats North Reading.
North Division 4: New Mission defeats Pope John.
South Division 1: Bishop Feehan defeats Braintree.
South Division 2: Oliver Ames defeats Hingham.
South Division 3: Archbishop Williams defeats Coyle-Cassidy.
South Division 4: Cathedral defeats Greater New Bedford.
Central Division 1: Natick defeats Wachusetts.
Central Division 2: Notre Dame defeats Medfield.
Central Division 3: Littleton defeats Sutton.
Central Division 4: Douglas defeats Millis.
West Division 1: Chicopee Comp defeats Central
West Division 2: Longmeadow defeats Pittsfield.
West Division 3: Hoosac Valley defeats Drury.
West Division 4: Quobog defeats Mt. Everett.

March 14, 2016
Top 25 Pi Day Jokes: Pi Day Jokes, Puns, & Riddles
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Guest Blog Page
March Jokes / Top 10 March Pages / March Hashtags of the Day
March Lessons & March Guest Blogs
Pi Day Jokes (11)
1. 3.14% of Sailors are PI rates! (Top Pirate Jokes)
2. What is a math teacher’s favorite dessert?… Pi! (Find a U.S. math teacher who tutors!)
3. What is the ideal number of pieces to cut a pie into?… 3.14
4. Mathematician: “Pi r squared” Baker:” No! Pies are round, cakes are square!
5. How many pastry chefs does it take to make a pie?… 3.14.
6. In Alaska, where it gets very cold, pi is only 3.00. As you know, everything shrinks in the cold. They call it Eskimo pi.
7. The roundest knight at King Arthur’s was Sir Cumference… He ate too much Pi!
8. What is the official animal of Pi Day?… the PI – thon!
9. The worst thing about getting hit in the face with pi is that it never ends.
10. Never talk to pi. He’ll go on forever.
11. I just saw the movie American Pi. I gave it a rating of 3.14.
12. What is 1.57?… Half a pie
13. What do you get when you cut a jack o’lantern by its diameter?… Pumpkin Pi! (Top Halloween Jokes)
14. What do you get when you take green cheese and divide its circumference by its diameter?… Moon Pi.
15. What do you get when you take the sun and divide its circumference by its diameter?… Pi in the sky.
16. What was Sir Isaac Newton’s favorite dessert?… Apple pi!
17. What do we get when we take the object and order the rim by the diameter?…Pi in the sky by and by.
18. What do you get if you divide the circumference of a bowl of ice cream by its diameter?… Pi a’la mode.
19. Come to the nerd side, we have pi!
20. How far can you recite pi?… Cherry, Apple, Pecan, Blueberry…
21. What famous private investigator solves math problem?… Magnum PI
22. What do you get when you take a bovine and divide its circumference by its diameter?… A cow pi.
23. A mathematician, a physicist, and an engineer are all given identicalrubber balls and told to find the volume. They are given anything theywant to measure it, and have all the time they need. The mathematician pulls out a measuring tape and records the circumference. He then divides by two times pi to get the radius, cubes that, multiplies by pi again, and then multiplies by four-thirds and thereby calculates the volume.The physicist gets a bucket of water, places 1.00000 gallons of water in the bucket, drops in the ball, and measures the displacement to six significant figures. And the engineer? He writes down the serial number of the ball, and looks it up.
24. Albert Einstein‘s birthday was on Pi Day — March 14, 1879. Perhaps he served pie for his birthday instead of cake.
25. What do you get when you take a native Alaskan and divide its circumference by its diameter?… Eskimo pi.
26. Several Experts Several experts were all posed the following question: What is pi?
- The engineer said: “It is approximately 3 and 1/7″
- The physicist said: “It is 3.14159.”
- The mathematician thought a bit, and replied “It is equal to pi.”
- A nutritionist: “Pie is a healthy and delicious dessert!”
March 13, 2016
The World's Best Pi Day Activity: Pi Day Challenge
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Guest Blog Page March Jokes / Top 10 March Pages / March Hashtags of the Day March Lessons & March Guest Blogs
The Pi Day Challenge is the #1 Pi Day Interactive! (It is a slice of Heaven!) Do you have enough math skills to pass the test: Click here to find out! http://www.pidaychallenge.com/ The Pi Day Challenge really is a slice of heaven for math teachers. March 14th (3.14) is the annual celebration of the number pi – 3.1415926. It is a day for math teachers to be creative and use 21st century resources to engage a new generation of math learners. (For more lesson ideas read our recent post 5 Amazing Websites to Prepare for the Pi Day Challenge) The best interactive activity for math enthusiasts to celebrate Pi Day is the Pi Day Challenge! The opening page of the website explains: “The Pi Day Challenge is a series of puzzles that are logic-based. A team of logicians adapted or created these puzzles – some require research, some require mathematics, some require pure savvy.” There are 3 easy ways to accept the the Pi Day Challenge:
1. Sign on with Facebook
2. Enter an email address and password OR
3. Register as a guest
The Pi Day Challenge team wants students and adults around the world to be able to participate easily and hassle-free, that is why they created these very convenient and easy to use options. Teachers can use this 21st Century Learning activity in a variety of ways. Test your personal knowledge – These activities are very fun and challenging. The puzzles require you to think in a variety of ways. It may be that you judge the the Pi Day Challenge to be a great activity that is level appropriate for your students. No matter how a math teachers uses this activity, taking the challenge is an amazing opportunity to see how the Pi Day Challenge could be incorporated into your curriculum. Spend a class period in the computer room – If your school has the technology and availability, and your students have the skill and motivation, spend a class period working together or individually to solve the puzzles. Just step back and watch how students will creatively and cooperatively work to solve the problems. Solve the problems as a class – Although probably not the most ideal way to engage students, if you have access to a Smart Board / projector, you could complete some of the puzzles as a class. Using this method would work great with smaller class sizes. Perhaps you select a few of the puzzles that are most appropriate for your students’ abilities. Extra Credit – This is a final alternative if your school is technologically challenged. With this method you will engage your motivated students. You may not reach all your students, however the ones you do emgage will be completely passionate about finding the solutions. The Pi Day Challenge team uses a variety of ways to track the progress. The genius board is a listing of all the people who have completed the entire challenge. We have spoken with Matthew Plummer, the creator of the The Pi Day Challenge. We are hoping to have him provide a guest post in the future. As you can imagine, he and his team are extremely busy right now providing such an incredible resource for the entire mathematical community. If you enjoy this challenge, please consider making the small donation in celebration of Pi $3.14. He has invested years of his time developing this great challenge. He would love to be able to continue to provide The Pi Day Challenge in the future.
March 12, 2016
2016 Pi Day Challenge: #1 Pi Day Interactive for HS Students

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Pi Day Jokes & 101 Pi Day Jokes
The Pi Day Joke blog is being sponsored by IPractice Math.
IPractice Math is a great resource for parents and teachers! It offers learning topics in Algebra, Calculus, Decimals, Fractions, and Consumer Math. Teachers and independent learners can register. here to register.

The Pi Day Challenge is the #1 Pi Day Interactive! (It is a slice of Heaven!) Do you have enough math skills to pass the test: Click here to find out! http://www.pidaychallenge.com/

March 12, 2016
Pi Day Websites: Pi Day Websites for Teachers
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Pi Day Jokes!
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My Town Tutors: We are biased, but we do our best to share great resources for teachers! We list 101 Pi Day Jokes for Math Teachers & the Top Pi Day Jokes!
1. The Exploratorium: The place where it all began. If you love Pi Day, this is the place for amazing events activities. They also have a shop with some unique gifts that might be of interest to math enthusiasts!

“Come visit us on March 14 (Pi Day) when we open our doors to the public for free. Please note: Pi Day activities are scheduled from 1:00 p.m. to 3:30 p.m.
Welcome to the 26th annual Pi Day, the mathematical holiday founded at the Exploratorium and celebrated by number lovers around the world. To honor the never-ending number 3.14159… (and Einstein’s birthday), we’ll serve up π-themed activities, rituals, antics, and plenty of pie. Find out what’s so special about this famous mathematical constant, and take your (decimal) place in our annual march to the Pi Shrine!”
2. The Pi Day Challenge: This is an amazing website! A must for any high school teacher.
“March 14th is a fantastically mathematical day. Pi Day. Accept the challenge. The Pi Day Challenge is a series of puzzles that are logic-based. A team of logicians adapted or created these puzzles – some require research, some require mathematics, some require pure savvy.”
3. The National Council of Teachers of Mathematics: Math teachers need to connect with this account. It is an absolute amazing resource on Pi Day and every other day of the year.
“Every year math enthusiasts everywhere celebrate pi, a celebrity among mathematical constants, on March 14 (3/14), also known as Pi Day. Extreme enthusiasts have a special celebration at 1:59 (aka, Pi Minute).”
4. Edutopia: The George Lucas Foundation: What works in education. 7 great ideas for Pi Day!
“Happy 3.14159265358979323846264 Day! That’s right, Pi Day is coming on 3/14, and the annual celebration offers a great opportunity for students to explore Pi! (And maybe enjoy some pie, as well.) Of course, there are plenty of great teaching resources online to help your class celebrate Pi Day, and we here at Edutopia thought we’d help.”
5. Math Forum: Drexel University has great math resources for Pi Day and everyday of the year! A must for math teachers of all levels.
“How many celebrations are there in your math class? Each year on March 14th many classrooms break from their usual routines to observe the festivities of Pi Day.
6. Princeton Pi Day: Princeton has a great international great video contest open to all students on the planet.
“1:59 p.m. Deadline for International Pi Day Princeton Video Contest Schools and individuals from all over the planet upload videos into YouTube and share the link toprincetonmimi@gmail.com. All content must include celebration of Pi & Einstein’s Birthday and run less than 3.14 minutes. Winning school or individual age 13 yrs and younger compete to win $314.159!”
7. Pi Day: The #1 website for Pi Day T-shirts, Mugs, and Pins. Awesome for all math enthusiasts! Buy a t-shirt and help support My Town Tutors!
“Pi Day is celebrated on March 14th (3/14) around the world. Pi (Greek letter “π”) is the symbol used in mathematics to represent a constant — the ratio of the circumference of a circle to its diameter — which is approximately 3.14159.”
8. Teach Pi: Any website committed to teaching Pi and math is all right in our book! Awesome for all math enthusiasts! (Buy a t-shirt and help support My Town Tutors!)

“Welcome to TeachPi.org, the first and best place on the Web for teachers who want to find or share ideas for Pi Day activities, learning, and entertainment. We believe that promoting an enthusiasm for learning, through celebration and creativity, will lead only to a richer classroom environment and a deeper appreciation of mathematics.”
9. National Education Association: We love the NEA and firmly beleive NEA Teachers are Great Tutors! We even offer a special rate for NEA members who tutor.

“Teachers can find more than 50 activities to make Pi Day entertaining, educational, tasty, and fun at TeachPi.org. TeachPi.org links in other sites that let users explore Pi in other ways: search for number patterns in 200 million digits of Pi or approximate the value of Pi using Buffon’s Needle experiment.”
10. IPractice Math: IPractice Math is a great resource for math teachers and math tutors. They have been our yearly sponsor of 101 Pi Day Jokes! We highly recommend this amazing website that offers FREE on-line math help!
11. Pi Day 5K: Mathematical Running Fun: To counter the marvelously tasty pastry consumption, go for a run! The Pi Day 5K is an opportunity for runners and math enthusiasts to celebrate Pi Day by covering 3.1415 miles (or 5.05334 kilometers for those adherents of the metric system) under their own power. That’s about it—‘tis a fun reason to run!
12. Scholastic: Scholastic is a great resource for K-12 every day of the year!
“Fun math and geometry activities to celebrate the most useful irrational number on Pi Day, March 14!”
“Every year on March 14, math lovers around the country celebrate pi. Some enthusiasts even go so far as to mark Pi Minute at 1:59, which takes into account the first six digits of the pi: 3.14159. Pi Day provides the perfect excuse for incorporating math and geometry into all aspects of the school day.”
13. Mensa Education Foundation Educational Programs: A 13-page PDF document with some great lessons, ideas and resources for Pi Day.
14. The World of Pi: European Pi (Approximation) Day is July 22. (22/7). Some great ideas from across the pond!
“Although it is less famous than the Pi day (3/14 en notation anglaise), the Pi approximation day inspired Jean-Yves Degos: here is a picture , “Damien Hirst-like”, of the 272 first digits of Pi in base 12. The code for generating this beautiful art is in language Sage and availablehere. Many thanks to him and happy Pi approximation day!!”
15. Education World: We love the great resources share by Education World every day of the year! Pi Day is no exception.

“Teachers in many classrooms celebrate Pi Day this month. Pi — the number 3.14… — gets its own special day on 3/14, or March 14. EdWorld editors have gathered a collection of links to ideas and activities that will help you plan a Pi Day celebration for your classroom or school.
If one day of the year screams Party! in math class, that day is March 14. Each year on 3/14, teachers in classrooms across the globe take a break from the normal routine to plan a special celebration in honor of pi, or the number 3.14…”
16. Math Goodies: We love goodies of all kinds, especially educational goodies.

“To prepare for these explorations, you will need to browse some lessons on circumference and area of circles. Next, you will engage in web-based inquiry to explore the meaning and history of Pi and calculations involving Pi. You will also explore the history of Pi Day and how it is celebrated. You can then celebrate Pi Day by engaging in online activities of your own choosing. Links to resources on Pi and Pi Day are provided. These tasks will require a computer, access to the web, paper and pencil.”
17. Sesame Street: The Count Counts the digits of Pi: The Count is one of the earliest proponents of math. Watching the video may take a while, but it is worth it.
We love Pi Day and have listed some great links via the #1 Resource for Pi Day the Exploratorium.
Top Twitter Accounts for Pi Day
March 11, 2016
Emmanuel's Gift: #1 DVD for Inclusion Week
Emmanuel’s Gift: Changing Perceptions

Emmanuel’s Gift is a great DVD to show to high school students. It can be shown in a psychology class. The DVD is great to use with motivation, emotion, and perception. It is a great companion to a book called Success for Teens. Emmanuel’s story illustrates what one individual with a little help and how one person can change the minds of an entire nation. It is an awesome video.
The DVD, narrated by Oprah Winfrey, highlights some incredible organizations including, the challenged athletes foundation, the free wheelchair mission and Rudy’s Braveheart Challenge.

Scenes (with notes)
1. Opening Credits (0:00 – 4:10)
2. His Own Vision (4:11 – 11:15)
3. Standing Alone (11:16 – 15:29)
4. Thinking Big Picture (15:30 – 21:20)
5. Overcoming Adversity (21:21 – 29:57): Jim McLaren Ivy League Football player. Ran a 3:16 marathon as an amputee. 8 years later: “something amazing is about to happen.” I see the grill of a black van coming into me. The last thing I hear is the driver hitting the accelerator and not the break. The result is a broken neck. The Challenged Athletes Foundation “Somehow I touched this man in Ghana.”
6. Braving Surgery (29:58 – 37:37): “He had $3 his pocket. 1st time on a plane. “He was simply born without a shin bone.” Rudy Garcia Tolson is another amazing athlete who has excelled because of the Challenged Athletes Foundation (@RudyGTcaf #NoLegsNoLimits) “How much do you earn per day?… $2.00!” “I am going to get my new leg.” 2- hour surgery, rehabilitation “It’s a gift came to my life.” He was walking, swimming, and biking – training for Rudy’s Braveheart Challenge.
7. Bigger Things to Do (37:38 – ) “I am taken care of but I have people to take care of back home.” There are now 140 applications. We hope to help 2 more. Free Wheel Chair Mission. “You take care of me, I am going to take care of thousands of more just like me.”
8. Hero’s Welcome (42:47 – 48:18) “I love Emmanuel because of his ability of perseverance.” An inspiration person to so many. (It all started with a typewriter and a request.)
9. Making Amends (48:19 – 56:18) Village chief has a celebration for Emmanuel. “My father is here. I am so shocked. I am so sad. I can’t believe that. I can’t believe that.” Father disowned him at birth.
10. Political Action (56:19 – 1:08:59)
11. Emmanuel’s Impact (1:09:00 – 1:17:23)
12. Ending Credits (1:17:24 – 1:19:11)
Emmanuel’s Gift Reflection Questions

What a truly amazing story of how one person can make such a difference simply by leading a positive life. In the video we saw three incredible examples of challenged athletes who are not only accomplishing amazing individual feats, but also working to break the boundaries set by society on disabled individuals.
1. Rate the video on a scale of 1 – 10, then write a reaction to the video. Comment on any aspect of the video (the conditions in Ghana, the treatment / attitude towards disabled people in Ghana, overcoming adversity, having a positive attitude, making the best of a situation, etc.)
2. Comment in detail on ONE of the three “challenged athletes” presented in the video.
- Emmanuel
- Rudy
- Jim
Discuss their situation and what they have done to overcome it. What about the person’s story did you find motivational? How did the story impact your thinking about what you may be able to accomplish in your life?
3. How does the movie make you reflect on your own life? Does it inspire you to work harder to achieve your dreams? What is one goal right now that you have and are working on achieving? What steps can you take now to bring you closer to your dreams?
4. Share a personal example (or one you have seen or read about) of an athlete or non-athlete who has overcome adversity.
March 11, 2016
March Madness Jokes: March Madness Basketball Jokes
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TEST YOUR MARCH MADNESS TRIVIA KNOWLEDGE! IT IS AWESOME!

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1. What did the march say to all the madness?… What’s all that bracket.
2. In what sport is a basket filled but never gets full?… Basketball.
3. What kind of stories are told by basketball players?…. Tall Tales.
4. Who was the poet of basketball?… Longfellow.
5. How many NCAA basketball players does it take to change a light bulb?… Only one. But he gets money, a car, and three credit hours for it.
6. What do you call a piece of cheese that likes to shoot hoops?… Swiss!!!
7. Why did the basketball player visit the bank?… His checks were all bouncing.
8. Why did the basketball player go to jail?… Because he shot the ball!
9. Why do basketball players love cookies?… Because they can dunk them!
10. They’re a team in transition… They’re going from bad to worse.
11. Why can’t you play basketball with pigs?… They hog the ball
12. Why did the basketball sit on the sideline and sketch pictures of chickens?… He was trying to draw fowls / fouls.
13. What’s the difference between a ball hog and time?… Time passes.
14. “He’s great on the court,” a sportswriter said of a college basketball player in an interview with his coach. “But’s how’s his scholastic work?” “Why, he makes straight A’s,” replied the coach. “Wonderful!” said the sportswriter. “Yes,” agreed the coach, “but his B’s are a little crooked.”
15. “I told one player, ‘Son, I can’t understand it with you. Is it ignorance or apathy?’ He said, ‘Coach, I don’t know and I don’t care.'” Frank Layden
16. “We have a great bunch of outside shooters; unfortunately, all our games are played indoors.” Weldon Drew
17. Did you hear one Final Four team is dressing only 7 players?… The rest dress themselves.
18. “All I know is, as long as I led the Southeastern Conference in scoring, my grades would be fine.” Charles Barkley
19. What did the Butler fan do after his team won the NCAA Championship?… Shut off his Xbox.
20. Why did John Calipari cross the road?… To hit up the ATM so he could pay another 6’11” forward.
21. Why doesn’t BYU want to be this year’s Cinderella team?… Because the school considers the movie to be inappropriate.
22. Why is there a Texas school in the tournament called “Steve Austin”?… Because Stone Cold said so.
23. Why do Gonzaga fans only play 14 holes of golf?… Because they can’t make it to the Final Four.
24. What do you call a Georgetown player with a championship ring?… a senior citizen.
25. Duke fans have trouble spelling “Krzyzewski.” UNC fans have trouble spelling “Smith.”
26. What’s a cheerleader’s favorite color?… Yeller!
27. When Austin Peay University had a player named Fly Williams, the students would chant, “The Fly is open! Let’s go Peay!”
28. “The secret is to have eight great players, and four others who will cheer like crazy.” Jerry Tarkanian
29. “The best thing about freshmen is they become sophomores.” (Not always true)Al McGuire
30. What do basketball cheerleaders drink before they go to a basketball game?… Root beer!
31. What’s the difference between a dog and a basketball player?… One drools, the other dribbles.
32. No, but they gave one to me anyway. – L.A. Lakers rookie Elden Campbell when asked if he earned a degree at Clemson University
33. If a basketball team were chasing a baseball team, what time would it be?… Five after nine. (9:05)
34. Why is a baby good at basketball?… Because they’re always dribbling.
35. Why was Cinderella such a bad basketball player?… Her coach was a pumpkin.
36. If Shaquille O’Neal was a shade of blue he would be Shaquille O’Teal.
37. What would you get if you crossed basketball with a newborn snake?… a bouncing baby boa.
38. Why is a scrambled egg like a losing basketball team?… Because they both have been beaten.
39. Did you hear about the basketball team that doesn’t have a website?… They can’t string three “Ws” together.
40. Why can’t you get a fairly officiated game in the jungle?… They are all cheetahs.
41. Why are basketball players messy eaters?… They’re always dribbling.
42. Why is basketball the grossest sport there is?… Because they dribble all over the court.
43. What do you call a pig with playing basketball?… A ball hog.
44. Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?… She ran away from the ball.
45. If a basketball gets athlete’s foot, what does an astronaut get?… Missle toe (Top Christmas Jokes)
46. What do you call an unbelievable story about a basketball player?… A tall tale.
47. The psychology instructor had just finished a lecture on mental health and had proceeded to give an oral quiz to the freshman class. Speaking specifically about manic depression, the instructor asked, “How would you diagnose a patient who walks back and forth screaming at the top of his lungs one minute, then sits in a chair weeping uncontrollably the next?” A young man in the rear of the room raised his hand and answered, “A basketball coach?”
48. Why couldn’t the basketball player listen to his music?… Because he broke a record!
49. How do basketball players stay cool during a game?… They stand near the fans.
50. Hanging in the hallway at the High School are the basketball team pictures from the past 40 years. A player in the center of the front row in each picture holds a basketball identifying the year — “62-63,” “63-64,” “64-65,” etc. One day I spotted a freshman looking curiously at the photos. Turning to me, he said, “Isn’t it strange how the teams always lost by one point?”
51. Why are frogs so good at basketball?… Because they always make jump shots.
52. Why is a referee like an angry chicken?… They both have foul mouths.
53. Why couldn’t the baby make a basket?… Because he was always dribbling.
54. Why was the basketball court wet?… Because people were dribbling on it!
55. I play in the over-40 basketball league. We don’t have jump balls. The ref just puts the ball on the floor and whoever can bend over and pick it up gets possession.
56. Why did Ron Artest leave the game early?… He wanted to beat the crowd.
57. What is the difference between Allen Iverson and time?… Time passes.
58. “I’m a coach who believes in execution. Whenever I see [that player] shoot free throws, I want to execute him.” Rick Pitino
59. “When Xavier McDaniel plays against Orlando Wooldridge, it’s a coach’s dream – X vs O.” Mychal Thompson
60. “Fans never fall asleep at our games because they’re afraid they might get hit with a pass.” George Raveling
61. “I don’t like talking about money; all I know is the good Lord must have wanted me to have it.” Larry Bird
62. “I think that the team that wins game five will win the series… unless we lose game five.” Charles Barkley
63. Why did the basketball player go to jail?… Because he was bouncing checks!
64. What does a basketball player do when he loses his eyesight?.. Become a referee.
March 10, 2016
Pi Day Jokes: Top Pi Day Jokes
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TRY THE PI DAY CHALLENGE! IT IS AWESOME!

Top 10 Seasonal Jokes!: A GREAT advertising opportunity! 365 Sports Jokes!
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101 Pi Day Jokes for Teachers!

Pi Day Jokes (11)
1. 3.14% of Sailors are PI rates! (Top Pirate Jokes)
2. Mathematician: “Pi r squared” Baker:” No! Pies are round, cakes are square!
3. In Alaska, where it gets very cold, pi is only 3.00. As you know, everything shrinks in the cold. They call it Eskimo pi.
4. What is a math teacher’s favourite dessert?… Pi! (Find a U.S. math teacher who tutors!)
5. The roundest knight at King Arthur’s was Sir Cumference… He ate too much Pi!
6. What is the official animal of Pi Day?… the PI – thon!
7. Never talk to pi. He’ll go on forever.
8. What do you get when you cut a jack o’lantern by its diameter?… Pumpkin Pi! (Top Halloween Jokes)
9. What do you get when you take green cheese and divide its circumference by its diameter?… Moon Pi.
10. What do you get when you take the sun and divide its circumference by its diameter?… Pi in the sky.
11. What do we get when we take the object and order the rim by the diameter?…Pi in the sky by and by.
12. What do you get if you divide the circumference of a bowl of ice cream by its diameter?… Pi a’la mode.
13. I just saw the movie American Pi. I gave it a rating of 3.14.
14. Come to the nerd side, we have pi!
15. What was Sir Isaac Newton’s favorite dessert?… Apple pi!
16. How far can you recite pi? Cherry, Apple, Pecan, Blueberry…
17. The worst thing about getting hit in the face with pi is that it never ends.
18. How many pastry chefs does it take to make a pie?… 3.14.
19. What famous private investigator solves math problem?… Magnum PI
20. What do you get when you take a bovine and divide its circumference by its diameter?… A cow pi.
21. What is 1.57?… Half a pie
22. A mathematician, a physicist, and an engineer are all given identicalrubber balls and told to find the volume. They are given anything theywant to measure it, and have all the time they need. The mathematician pulls out a measuring tape and records the circumference. He then divides by two times pi to get the radius, cubes that, multiplies by pi again, and then multiplies by four-thirds and thereby calculates the volume.The physicist gets a bucket of water, places 1.00000 gallons of water in the bucket, drops in the ball, and measures the displacement to six significant figures. And the engineer? He writes down the serial number of the ball, and looks it up.
23. Albert Einstein‘s birthday was on Pi Day — March 14, 1879. Perhaps he served pie for his birthday instead of cake.
24. What is the ideal number of pieces to cut a pie into?… 3.14
25. What do you get when you take a native Alaskan and divide its circumference by its diameter?… Eskimo pi.
26. Several Experts Several experts were all posed the following question: What is pi?
- The engineer said: “It is approximately 3 and 1/7”
- The physicist said: “It is 3.14159.”
- The mathematician thought a bit, and replied “It is equal to pi.”
- A nutritionist: “Pie is a healthy and delicious dessert!”
Math Riddles (14)
1. Why should you never mention the number 288 in front of anyone?… Because it is too gross (2 x 144 – two gross).
2. How is the moon like a dollar?… They both have 4 quarters.
3. How can you add eight 8′s to get the number 1,000? (only using addition) A: 888 +88 +8 +8 +8 = 1,000
4. How many eggs can you put in an empty basket? … Only one, after that the basket is not empty.
5. Where can you buy a ruler that is 3 feet long?… At a yard sale
6. When things go wrong, what can you always count on?… Your fingers.
7. What coin doubles in value when half is deducted?… A half dollar.
8. Why are diapers like 100 dollar bills?… They need to be changed.
9. What goes up and never comes down?… Your Age
10. Why is the longest human nose on record only 11 inches long?… Otherwise it would be a foot.
11. Why do they never serve beer at a math party?… Because you can’t drink and derive…
12. Why didn’t the quarter roll down the hill with the nickel?… Because it had more cents.
13. Why is 6 afraid of 7?… Because 7 8(ate) 9
14. What is a proof?… One-half percent of alcohol.
Geometry Jokes (33)
1. What do you call a teapot of boiling water on top of mount everest?… A high-pot-in-use
2. What do you call a crushed angle?…. A Rectangle (wrecked angle)
3. What did the baby tree say when it looked in a mirror?… Gee-Om-A-Tree.
4. What do you get when you cross geometry with McDonalds?… A plane cheeseburger.
5. Why did I divide sin by tan?… Just cos.
6. What shape is usually waiting for you at Stabucks?… A line.
7. Why did the obtuse angle go to the beach?… because it was over 90 degrees.
8. What do you get when you cross a mountain climber and a mosquito?…
9. Nothing! You know you can’t cross a scalar and a vector.
10. What did the acorn say when he grew up?… Gee, I’m A Tree!
11. Why does nobody talk to circles?… Because there is no point!
12. What do you call an angle which is adorable?… acute angle
13. What did the student say when the witch doctor removed his curse?… Hexagon
14. Who invented the Round Table?… Sir Cumference.
15. Which triangles are the coldest?… Ice-sosceles triangles.
16. What do people who whine a lot and 3 points have in common?… They are both coplaners
17. How many grams of protein are there in that slice of chocolate pie?… 3.142
18. What kind of tree does a math teacher climb?… Geometry
19. What do you call people who like tractors?… Protractors
20. Why were the similar triangles weighing themselves?… They were finding their scale.
21. Why won’t the circles invite the ellipses over for dinner?… They are too eccentric.
22. Why did the 30-60-90 triangle marry the 45-45-90 triangle?… They were right for each other.
23. Why is a geometry book always unhappy?… Because it always has lots of problems.
24. Why is Ms. Radian such a good reporter?… She covers the story from every angle.
25. Why couldn’t the angle get a loan?… His parents wouldn’t cosine
26. Where do circles, ellipses, hyperbolas and parabolas like to hang out in the summer?… Coney Island.
27. Why didn’t the chicken cross to the other side of the inequality?… It couldn’t get past the boundary line.
28. Q: What do you get if you divide the cirucmference of a jack-o-lantern by its diameter?… Pumpkin Pi
29. Why was the parent function upset with its child?… It was stretched to its limit.
30. What is a proof?.. One-half percent of alcohol.
31. Why do you rarely find mathematicians spending time at the beach?… Because they have sine and cosine to get a tan and don’t need the sun!
32. What did one geometry book say to the other?… Don’t bother me I’ve got my own problems!
33. What do you call a broken record?… A Decca-gone
Calculus Jokes (21)
1. Why do they never serve beer at a math party?… Because you can’t drink and derive…
2. Why won’t Goldilocks drink a glass of water with 8 pieces of ice in it? It’s too cubed.
3. What’s the integral of (1/cabin)d(cabin)?… A natural log cabin!
4. What is the first derivative of a cow?… Prime Rib!
5. What is the value of the contour integral around Western Europe?… Zero. Why?
6. Because all poles are in Eastern Europe!
7. How does a mathematician induce good behavior in her children?… “I’ve told you n times, I’ve told you n+1 times…”
8. What is polite and works for the phone company?… A deferential operator.
9. Why was the parent function upset with its child?… It was stretched to its limit.
10. Did you hear the joke about the statistician?… Probably
11. What wild animal is good at calculus?… The tangent lion.
12. Why is a calculus book always unhappy?… Because it always has lots of problems.
13. Why was the Calculus teacher bad at baseball?… He was better at fitting curves than hitting them.
14. Why was the function so bent out of shape?… It’s regression model was too tight a fit.
15. What is the integral of log cabin d cabin?…Log Cabin + sea = houseboat.
16. Why do you rarely find mathematicians spending time at the beach?… Because they have sine and cosine to get a tan and don’t need the sun!
17. What did one calculus book say to the other?… Don’t bother me I’ve got my own problems!
18. What’s yellow and equivalent to the Axiom of Choice?… Zorn’s Lemon.
19. Why did the algebra students throw bottles of hand cream across the classroom?… They were investigating projectile lotion.
20. What do you get if you cross an elephant with a zebra?… Elephant zebra sin theta.
21. Why is it that the more accuracy you demand from an interpolation function, the more expensive it becomes to compute?… That’s the Law of Spline Demand.
Algebra Jokes (22)
1. Why was the student afraid of the y-intercept?… She thought she’d be stung by the b.
2. Who invented algebra?… A Clever X-pert.
3. What do you call mall friends who love math? alge “bros”
4. Why won’t Goldilocks drink a glass of water with 8 pieces of ice in it?… It’s too cubed.
5. What do you get when you cross an algebra class with the prom?… The quadratic formal.
6. What do you get when you cross a mountain climber and a mosquito?… Nothing! You know you can’t cross a scalar and a vector.
7. Why is an algebra book always unhappy?… Because it always has lots of problems.
8. Why do you rarely find mathematicians spending time at the beach?… Because they have sine and cosine to get a tan and don’t need the sun!
9. What is purple and commutative?… An abelian grape
10. What shape is usually waiting for you at Stabucks?… A line.
11. Why did the relation need a math tutor? … It failed the vertical-line test.
12. How can a fisherman determine how many fish he needs to catch to make a profit?… By using a cod-ratic inequality.
13. Why did the imaginary number turn red?… It ran out of i-drops.
14. What does the little mermaid wear?… An algae-bra.
15. How does a ghost solve a quadratic equation?… By completing the scare.
16. What is a proof?… One-half percent of alcohol.
17. What did algebra math book say to the other?… Don’t bother me I’ve got my own problems!
18. What is the definition of a polar bear?… A rectangular bear after a coordinate transformation
19. Why did all the apples in the fruit bowl know each other?… They were core-relations.
20. Why was the matrix arrested?… Illegal entry.
21. What do you call a rodent with babies?… A quad-rat-ic parent.
22. What do you get when you cross a linebacker with a computer geek?… A linear programmer.
March 10, 2016