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- Knock knock?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best book jokes in the world!
- Dog Jokes: Have you read the book Raising Dogs?… No? You should it’s a pup-up book.
- Dog Jokes: Hush puppies… the unoffical dog of the American Library Association.
- What is Alaska’s official state Novel?… “Fifty Shades of Grey.“
- My father gave me a really cheap dictionary for my birthday… I couldn’t find the words to thank him. (Father’s Day Jokes)
- What did one book say to the other one?… I just wanted to see if we are on the same page.
- Gymnastics Jokes: A book never written: “How to Do Gymnastics” by Tom E. Tuck.
- Book Jokes: What is the best book to read in autumn?… Gourd of the Rings.
- Arizona Jokes: I’m reading a book about Arizona history… It’s pretty dry, but I’m sticking with it.
- Tolkien typed the entire Lord Of The Rings using only two fingers. That must have been Mordor.
- Dog Jokes: Which breed of dog is the favorite of librarians?… A hush puppy!
- Book Jokes: J.R.R. Tolkien and Angela Lansbury have paired up for a middle-earth murder mystery… Mordor She Wrote.
- Baseball Jokes: A book never written: “How to Be a Better Baseball Player” by Ben Schwarmer.
- If Charles Dickens wrote The Lord of the Rings, how would the novel have started?… It was the best of Shires. It was the Worcestershires.
- Hiking Jokes: Why are mountains so good at telling stories?… Because they have tall tales!
- Hiking Jokes: Why was the book about mountains so interesting?… Because it had so many cliff-hangers.
- Baseball Jokes: A book never written: “The Quickest Baseball Game” by Earl E. Wynn.
- Dog Jokes: Dog Man… The unofficial book of National Dog Day.
- Did you hear that the copies of The Lord of the Rings, The Hobbit, and The Silmarillion are considered one-of-a-kind when sold and traded?… They’re Non-Fungible Tolkiens.
- What is a librarian’s favorite Deep Purple song?… Hush!
- For my son’s birthday, I got him a copy of “The Lord of the Rings”, but he wasn’t too happy. He thought it was a Tolkien gesture.
- Why did Thomas Jefferson go to the library?… To declare his love for books.
- Music Jokes: What is a librarian’s favorite Simon & Garfunkel songs?… The Sound of Silence.
- What do planets like to read?… Comet books.
- What do you do if a pet starts eating your library book?… Take the words right out of his mouth.
- What do librarians hang over their babies’ cribs?… Bookmobiles.
- Camping Pun: I’m reading a book on anti-gravity while camping—it’s impossible to put down!
- What has a spine but no bones?… A book. (Top Biology Jokes)
- Why did the Rumanian stop reading for the night?… To give his Bucharest (book a rest). (Top Geography Jokes)
- Any book with George Washington’s writing in it is worth thousands of dollars. Any book with my writing in it is worth two weeks of detention. (George Washington Quotes & American Revolutionary War Jokes)
- What would you get if you crossed a locomotive with the author of Tom Sawyer?… A choo choo Twain. (Top Mark Twain Quotes)
- How did the author of Tom Sawyer learn to ride a bicycle?… With Twain ing wheels. (Top Mark Twain Quotes)
- What happened when the bloodhound wrote his autobiography?… It got on the best smeller list. (Top Dog Jokes)
- What books were ordered from Prague?… Czech (check) books. (Top Geography Jokes)
- Which mythological character carried the maps?… Atlas. (Top Geography Jokes)
- What was the name of the book about a trio of adventurous French cows?… The Three Moo sketeers. (Top Geography Jokes & Top Milk Jokes)
- What book is about a rodent pioneer?… “Little Mouse on the Prairie.” (Top Geography Jokes)
- What did they call Tom Sawyer’s friend after he lost a lot of weight?… “Huckleberry thin (Finn).” (Top Mark Twain Quotes)
- Why was the library so messy?… Because it was full of litter ature.
- What would you get if you crossed a comedian and an Edgar Allan Poe story?… The wit and the pendulum.
- Did you read the dachshund’s autobiography?… It’s a long story.
- What Dr. Suess baseball book was never published?… “The Cat at Bat!” (Top Baseball Jokes)
- What is Sam-I-am’s middle name?… “I” (Top Dr. Seuss Jokes)
- What book does the “Cat in the Hat” hate?… Go Dogs Go! (Top Dr. Seuss Jokes & Top Cat Jokes)
- Librarian: Why don’t you take home a Dr. Seuss? Pupil: I didn’t know he made house calls. (Top Dr. Seuss Jokes & Dr. Seuss Trivia)
- Teacher: How many books did you finish over the summer? Pupil: None. My brother stole my box of crayons. (Top Summer Jokes)
- What made you laugh?… From the moment I picked your book up until I put it down I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.
- Teacher: Why are you holding your textbook up to the window Pupil: You told me to open it up to the Middle East. (Top Geography Jokes)
- Why did the vampire check out a drawing book?… He wanted to learn how to draw blood. (Top Halloween Jokes)
- How can you tell if an elephant checked out a book before you did?… When you open it, peanut shells fall out.
- What reference book should you use when you forget your shovel?… The dig-tionary. (Top Archeology Jokes)
- Librarian: Why don’t you take home Dr. Seuss? Pupil: I didn’t know he made house calls. (Top Dr. Seuss Jokes & Dr. Seuss Trivia)
- Teacher: What does your history book tell you about the Civil War? Pupil: It doesn’t tell me anything. I have to read the dumb thing. (Top Civil War Jokes)
- If you don’t know what the word “dictionary” means, where would you look it up?
- Teacher: Tell the class what book you read. Pupil: Black Beauty. Teacher: And tell the class what it was about. Pupil: It was about 120 pages.
- All of my school books have pictures in them, even if I have to draw them myself.
- My teacher caught me drawing in my American Revolution textbook. She said, “What do you think you’re doing?” I said, “Making my mark in history.” (Top 4th of July Jokes & Top Revolutionary War Jokes)
- One of my teachers said that I should hand in my books at the end of the year better than when I got them. What does he want me to do, add pages? (180 School Jokes)
- My teacher told us that books are man’s best friend, so my dog bit him. (Top Dog Jokes)
- My teacher says we should treat our schoolbooks just like we treat one another. So after school, I picked a fight with my History book. (Top Mother’s Day Jokes)
- Mother: How come you never bring any books home? Son: Mom, they’re schoolbooks, not home books. (Top Mother’s Day Jokes & Top Moms on Twitter)
- My lunch leaked all over my schoolbooks. I now have the only geography book where the map of Turkey is covered with gravy. (Top Geography Jokes)
- We have to carry heavy books home, then we have to carry heavy books back to school in the morning. If the authorities knew this was going to happen, why didn’t they build the school closer to us?
- Would Karen Read, since she was acquitted on the major charges, be a good spokesperson for National Read a Book Day?
- Librarian: Did you enjoy reading The Hunchback of Notre Dame? Pupil: Well, I read the first 100 pages, then I found out it wasn’t about football.
- Our school library is so quiet you can hear a pin drop and if it does; the pin will be sent to the principal’s office.
- Teacher: How many books have you read in your lifetime? Pupil: I don’t know. I’m not dead yet.
- Teacher: What did you learn from your history book about Harriet Beecher Stowe? Pupil: If you draw a beard and a stovepipe hat on her, she looks exactly like Abraham Lincoln.
- Our school librarian is very strict. She’ll send you to the principal’s office for thinking too loudly.
- Our school library is so quiet, when I’m sitting in there, I can hear my hair grow.
- Teacher: Tell the class what book you read and then tell them something about the plot. Pupil: I read “The Life of Thomas Jefferson.” He dies at the end.
- My teacher says our schoolbooks are a magic carpet that will take us all over the world. I took mine to the garage and had them fitted with seat belts.
- Teacher: Tell the class what book you read and what you thought of it. Pupil: I read the phone book, but I didn’t understand it. It had too many characters.
- Librarian: Did you enjoy reading Moby Dick? Pupil: I couldn’t finish it. I got seasick.
- Pupil: Do you have Oliver Twist in hard cover? Librarian: Yes, we do. Pupil:Well, let him out; he’s a friend of mine.
- Son: Dad, my teacher says I should have an encyclopedia. Father: Nonsense, you’ll walk to school the same as I did.
- The only thing I hate worse than carrying a lot of schoolbooks home is having to open them once I get there.
- Teacher: Who is your favorite author? Pupil: George Washington. Teacher: But George Washington never wrote any books. Pupil: You got it. (Top George Washington Quotes)
- Pupil: Do you have Moby Dick? Librarian: Yes, we do. Pupil: I thought something smelled fishy in here.
- Hey, you know I am writing a novel…. I can’t understand why a person will take a year to write a novel when he can easily buy one for a few dollars.
- What do you wear to show you care that it’s Dr. Seuss’ birthday on this early March winter day?… a hat! (Top Dr. Seuss Jokes)
- Why doesn’t the Grinch like knock knock jokes?… Because there’s always Whos there! (Top Dr. Seuss Jokes / Dr. Seuss Trivia / Top Christmas Jokes)
- What do Peter Pan and noon have in common?… Neither have a shadow.
- Knock knockout?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We promise for find the best Dr. Seuss jokes!
- Would it be a bad idea to have Karen Read as a spokesperson for National Read A Book Day?