Columbus Day Jokes

by | Oct 7, 2025 | Dads, Education, Find a tutor, Latest News, Moms, tutoring | 0 comments

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  1.  Knock knock?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best Columbus Day jokes.  
  2. Did you hear about the weekly poker game with Vasco da Gama, Christopher Columbus, Leif Erikson, and Francisco Pizarro?… They can never seem to beat the Straights of Magellan.
  3. Why does it take Christopher Columbus so long to learn the alphabet?… Because he can spend months at C.  
  4. How did Columbus do on his school report cards?… He always worked at C-Level. 
  5. Christopher Columbus got lost because the directions weren’t ‘pacific. 
  6. Why was Christopher Columbus awful at basketball?… He was always traveled. 
  7. Christopher Columbus was talking to the ocean one day and finally says “why so blue?” 
  8. Let’s celebrate Columbus Day by walking into someone’s house and telling them we live there now!  
  9. How did Christopher Columbus pay for his trip to the new land?… He used his Discover card.  
  10. What do you call a bee explorer?… Christopher Colum-buzz.   
  11. What baseball team did Columbus root for?… The Seattle Mariners.
  12. Why did the map always get into trouble with Christopher Columbus?… It had a bad latitude.   
  13. What are the only notes Christopher Columbus can sing?… High C’s [seas]  
  14. What did Columbus play when he was bored?… He played cards – because he always had a deck.
  15. What did Columbus use for money?… Sand dollars.
  16. The teacher stood at the front of the room. “Does anybody know what this Monday is?” About half of the students raised their hands. The teacher pointed to one of them. “It’s Columbus Day!” he crowed. The teacher smiled. “It is. Does anybody know why we celebrate it?” This time, only one student raised her hand. “It’s the day the Native Americans discovered Columbus!”
  17. What happened in 1492?… Native Americans discovered Columbus.  
  18. Which direction was smarter for #Columbus, longitude or latitude?… Longitude, because it has 360 degrees.  #ColumbusDay l 
  19. How did Christopher Columbus stay up-to-date on the news?…. By following current events.
  20. How did #Columbus avoid scurvy?… Vitamin Sea. 
  21. How did the crew of the Santa Maria wash their clothes?… They used tide.  
  22. Where did Columbus 1st land in America?… On his feet! 
  23. Why couldn’t anyone play cards on the voyage to the Americas?… Columbus was standing on the deck. 
  24. Why did Columbus cross the ocean?… To get to the other tide.  
  25. When did they serve dinner on the Santa Maria?… Maritime. 
  26. What is Christopher Columbus’s favorite song?… “Sailing” by Christopher Cross!
  27. Why did Christopher Columbus fail his spelling class?…. Because he insisted there were seven ‘C’s.
  28. Why did Christopher Columbus say his compasses and scales were intelligent?… Because they all graduated. 
  29. What kind of ships did Christopher Columbus have trouble with?… Relationships!  
  30. What is the best way for Christopher #Columbus to communicate with a fish?… Drop it a line!  
  31. What did the sea say to the Christopher Columbus?… Nothing, it just waved!
  32. What kind of candy would a drowning sailor on Christopher Columbus’ crew like to have?… A life saver! 
  33. Why was Columbus in trouble with the ocean?… He crossed it. 
  34. Where did Christopher Columbus play checkers?… Overboard. 
  35. Columbus’s favorite sport?… Water polo.
  36. Which NFL football team does Christopher Columbus like the least?…  The Vikings, because they always beat him. (Leif Eriksson found America first) 
  37. Columbus never gave up… he was always driven by a “wave” of determination!
  38. How did Columbus get down from his ship’s mast?… He didn’t – you only get down from a goose.  
  39. How did the young explorer get to school?… On the ColumBUS.
  40. Why did Columbus bring a #baseball player on his voyage?… In case he needed someone to batten down the hatches.  
  41. Columbus never let setbacks sink his spirit… he always rose with the tide!
  42. America had often been discovered before Columbus, but it had always been hushed up. Oscar Wilde  
  43. Why did it take Columbus so long to say the alphabet?… He spent months at C. 
  44. Why did Columbus’s first ship sink?… It was christened with holey water.  
  45. Columbus’s motto in life: “Keep calm and sail on!”
  46. What did the Christopher Columbus get on his math test?… A sea plus.  
  47. I got an email from an airline inviting me to “Discover America.”… I’ve replied with a link to the Wikipedia page about Christopher Columbus.  
  48. What’s the difference between Christopher Columbus and the Scarecrow  from the Wizard of Oz?… One left his Spain behind and the other left his #brain behind.  
  49. Columbus’ Father: I don’t care what you’ve discovered, Christopher. You could have written.  
  50. Where did Columbus find oceans without water?… On his map.   
  51. What did say when he was accused of speeding through the port?… I did knot.
  52. Columbus’s favorite constellation?… The North Star – it guided him to new horizons!
  53. What was Columbus’s favorite letter of the alphabet?…C (Sea). 
  54. What did Columbus do with the blue whale?… Cheered it up. 
  55. Columbus knew how to make an entrance… he always arrived with a splash!
  56. What vegetable wouldn’t Christopher Columbus bring back for the queen?… Leeks – because he was on a ship and didn’t want to sink.    
  57. How did the octopus make Christopher Columbus laugh?…With ten-tickles.
  58. What do Christopher Columbus and a map key have in common?… Both are legends. 
  59. Why did Columbus bring a map on his voyage?… He wanted to “chart” a course to success!
  60. What is Columbus’s favorite type of music?… Sea shanties
  61. How did Christopher Columbus make his crew laugh?… With a whale of a tale.
  62. How was Christopher Columbus like ants?… They both established colonies. #ColumbusDay  
  63. Columbus was always on the lookout for new opportunities… he had an “eye” for adventure!
  64. Why did Columbus bring helmets on his ships?… To protect the bulkhead.
  65. How was Columbus’s ship like Black Friday?… They’re both driven by sails.
  66. Hey Christopher Columbus! A friendly reminder: Sharks live in the ocean. Year-round.
  67. Columbus’s favorite board game?… “Risk” – he was always up for an adventure!
  68. What would you get if you crossed Columbus Day with #Halloween?… Ghoulumbus Day! 
  69. Columbus’s favorite book? “The Odyssey” – he could relate to the journey!
  70. Columbus went around the world in 1492. That isn’t a lot of strokes when you consider the course. Lee Trevino
  71. What did Columbus do on his birthday?… He got older.
  72. When is the best time for a Christopher Columbus to buy a new ship?… When it’s on sail.
  73. Hey @Petco! Which cat discovered America?… Christofurry Columbus! 
  74. How big was the shipwrecked Spanish ship?… It was capsized.  
  75. Why did Columbus hire a cleaning service for the Pinta?… It was looking dinghy. 
  76. Why did the lobster blush?… It saw the Nina’s bottom.
  77. What looks like half the Santa Maria?… The other half. 
  78. Columbus had a motto: “Discover first, ask for directions later!”
  79. Columbus was always ahead of his time… he had a compass-ionate heart!
  80. How was Columbus’s ship like an avid shopper?… They’re both driven by sales! 
  81. Columbus never underestimated the power of dreams… he knew they could chart a course to the extraordinary!
  82. The teacher was telling the story of Christopher Columbus and how many thought that the world was flat. Then she had mentioned that the world was really round and… got interrupted… “Miss Smith, the world is square, not round,” said Johnny. “No, it’s round Johnny. Who told you it was square?” replied the teacher. “My older brother. He claims he’s been to all 4 corners of the earth.”
  83. What was the last thing that Columbus said to his sailors before getting on the ship?… “Okay men, get on the ship.”
  84. Why does Christopher Columbus carry his sword?… Because swords can’t walk.
  85. Why did the Nina crash into the dock.It was closer than it a-PIER-ed (Nina was one of the ships used by Columbus) 
  86. Why did Columbus put one of his sailors in time-out?… He was being naughty-cal. 
  87. How much oil did Christopher Columbus need to reach America?… 3 Galleons.  #ColumbusDay 
  88. Why did Columbus do on his school report cards?… He always worked at C Level.  #ColumbusDay 
  89. How did the octupus make Christopher Columbus laugh?…With ten-tickles. (Ocean Jokes)
  90. What time was it when a whale jumped into Columbus’s boat?… Time to get a new boat. (Whale Jokes
  91. Who taught Christopher Columbus how to sail?… Bo Ting. 
  92. Why did Columbus eat a candle?… He needed a light snack.  (Candle Jokes)
  93. How did Columbus say hello to other sailors?… He waved.  #ColumbusDay 
  94. How did Columbus say hello to other sailors?… He waved. 
  95. How did Columbus get the Pinta for so cheap?… It was on sail. (Black Friday Jokes)
  96. Where did Columbus take his boat when it had a hole in it?… To the nearest doc. (Ocean Jokes & Doctor Jokes)
  97. What was a goal for Christopher Columbus?… When the ball went into the net. (Top 10 Sports Jokes)
  98. What happened when Christopher Columbus dropped his hat in the sea?… It got wet. (Ocean Jokes)
  99. How was Columbus’s ship like an avid shopper?… They’re both driven by sales! (Black Friday Jokes)
  100. What happened when Columbus was shot at by an Indian?… He had an arrow miss. (Archery Jokes)
  101. Why did the hungry Columbus eat the last candle?… He wanted a light snack. (Candle Jokes)
  102. Who was the first cat to discover America?… Christopher Columpuss! (Cat Jokes)
  103. What’s the difference between one of Columbus’s sailors and a monster?… One left his Spain behind and the other left his brain behind!  (Halloween Jokes)
  104. Who was the first feline to discover America?… Christopher Columpuss. (Cat Jokes)
  105. 180 school jokes! Start your day with a smile! http://www.mytowntutors.com/start-your-day-with-a-smile-180-school-jokes/ #teachers #teaching #education
  106. What did Columbus say when he was accused of speeding through the port? A: I did knot.
  107. What was Columbus’s favorite letter of the alphabet? A: C (Sea)
  108. What happened in 1492? A: Native Americans discovered Columbus.
  109. Why couldn’t anyone play cards on the voyage to the Americas? A: Columbus was standing on the deck.
  110. How did the octupus make Christopher Columbus laugh? A: With ten-tickles.
  111. What time was it when a whale jumped into Columbus’s boat? A: Time to get a new boat.
  112. How did Columbus avoid scurvy? A: Vitamin Sea. x Q: What did Columbus do with the blue whale? A: Cheered it up
  113. Why did the Nina crash into the dock. A: It was closer than it a-PIER-ed (Nina was one of the ships used by Columbus)
  114. How was Columbus’s ship like Black Friday? A: They’re both driven by sails.
  115. Why did Columbus eat a candle? A: He needed a light snack.
  116. Why did Columbus put one of his sailors in time-out? A: He was being naughty-cal.
  117. Who was the first feline to discover America? A: Christopher Columpuss.
  118. How did Columbus land in America? A: On his feet.
  119. How did Columbus say hello to other sailors? A: He waved.
  120. How did Columbus get the Pinta for so cheap? A: It was on sail.
  121. What baseball team did Columbus root for? A: The Mariners.
  122. What’s the difference between Christopher Columbus and the Scarecrow from the Wizard of Oz? A: One left his Spain behind and the other left his brain behind.
  123. Why did the map always get into trouble with Christopher Columbus? A: It had a bad latitude.
  124. Why was Columbus in trouble with the ocean? A: He crossed it.
  125. Why did Columbus do on his school report cards? A: He always worked at C-Level.
  126. Why did Columbus cross the ocean? A: To get to the other tide.
  127. What did Columbus use for money? A: Sand dollars.
  128. Where did Columbus take his boat when it had a hole in it? A: To the nearest doc.
  129. What was a goal for Christopher Columbus? A: When the ball went into the net.
  130. Wow big was the shipwrecked Spanish ship? A: It was capsized.
  131. What happened when Christopher Columbus dropped his hat in the sea? A: It got wet.
  132. Where did Columbus find oceans without water? A: On his map.
  133. How did the crew of the Santa Maria wash their clothes? A: They used tide.
  134. Why did Columbus hire a cleaning service for the Pinta? A: It was looking dinghy.
  135. What vegetable wouldn’t Christopher Columbus bring back for the queen? A: Leeks – because he was on a ship and didn’t want to sink.
  136. What looks like half the Santa Maria? A: The other half. 
  137. COLUMBUS’ Father: I don’t care what you’ve discovered, Christopher. You could have written.  
  138. What happened when Columbus was shot at by an Indian?… He had an arrow miss. 
  139. Why did the hungry Columbus eat the last candle?… He wanted a light snack. 
  140. Where did Columbus first land in America?… On his feet! 
  141. Who was the first cat to discover America?… Christopher Columpuss! 
  142. COLUMBUS’ Father: I don’t care what you’ve discovered, Christopher. You could have written.
  143. What happened when Columbus was shot at by an Indian?… He had an arrow miss.
  144. Why did the hungry Columbus eat the last candle?… He wanted a light snack.
  145. Who was the first cat to discover America?… Christopher Columpuss!
  146. How was Columbus’s ship like an avid shopper?… They’re both driven by sales!
  147. Where did Columbus first land in America?… On his feet! (Top Biology Jokes)
  148. Columbus’ Father: I don’t care what you’ve discovered, Christopher. You could have written. (Top Father’s Day Jokes & Top Father’s Day Quotes)
  149. Let’s celebrate Columbus Day by walking into someone’s house and telling them we live there now!
  150. The teacher stood at the front of the room. “Does anybody know what this Monday is?” About half of the students raised their hands. The teacher pointed to one of them. “It’s Columbus Day!” he crowed. The teacher smiled. “It is. Does anybody know why we celebrate it?” This time, only one student raised her hand. “It’s the day the Indians discovered Columbus!” (180 School Jokes)
  151. How was Columbus’s ship like an avid shopper?… They’re both driven by sales!
  152. The teacher was telling the story of Christopher Columbus and how many thought that the world was flat. Then she had mentioned that the world was really round and… got interrupted… “Miss Smith, the world is square, not round,” said Johnny. “No, it’s round Johnny. Who told you it was square?” replied the teacher. “My older brother. He claims he’s been to all 4 corners of the earth.” (Top Geography Jokes)
  153. What happened when Columbus was shot at by an Indian?… He had an arrow miss. (Top Archery Jokes)
  154. Why did the hungry Columbus eat the last candle?… He wanted a light snack.
  155. Who was the first cat to discover America?… Christopher Columpuss!
  156. What would you get if you crossed Columbus Day with Halloween?… Ghoulumbus Day!
  157. What’s the difference between one of Columbus’s sailors and a monster?… One left his Spain behind and the other left his brain behind! 
  158. Columbus went around the world in 1492. That isn’t a lot of strokes when you consider the course. Lee Trevino
  159. “America had often been discovered before Columbus, but it had always been hushed up.”  Oscar Wilde

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