Tag: Elementary school jokes

School Jokes: Elementary School Jokes for Teachers
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1. What flies around the kindergarten room at night?… The alpha-BAT. (26 Lessons for the Letter of the Week A- Z)
2. What’s the best place to grow flowers in school?… In the kindergarden. (26 Lessons for the Letter of the Week A- Z)
3. Why are fish so smart?… They live in schools!
4. What is a snake’s favorite class?… Hissss-tory! (Great Lessons for Psychology andU.S. History)
5. Why are bad school grades like a shipwreck in the Arctic Ocean?… They’re both below C level!
6. Why did the M&M go to school?… Because he really wanted to be a Smartie!
7. What is a witch’s favorite class?… Spelling (Is Spelling Important? phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid)
8. Why did the students study in the airplane?…. Because they wanted higher grades.
9. Why did the broom get a poor grade in school?… Because it was always sweeping during class!
10. What kind of school do you go to if you’re an ice cream man?… Sundae school
11. Teacher: I’ve had to send you to the principal every day this week. What do you have to say for yourself? Student: I’m glad it’s Friday!
12. What makes a Cyclops such an effective teacher?… He has only one pupil.
13. Why was school easier for cave people? … Because there was no history to study!
14. Why do magicians do so well in school?… They’re good at trick questions.
15. Best school book never written: “The Best Subject in School” by Jim Class.
16. What’s the difference between a teacher and a train?… A teacher says, “Spit out that gum!” and a train says, “Chew! Chew!”
17. What kind of school do you go to if you’re a surfer?… Boarding school.
18. Why was the teacher wearing sunglasses to school?… She had bright students!
19. Best back to school book never written: “When Does School Start?” by Wendy Belrings.
20. What kind of school do you go to if you’re a giant?… High school
21. What’s the king of all school supplies?… The ruler.
22. Teacher: Where are the Great Plains located?… Student: At the great airports!
23. What kind of school do you go to if you’re King Arthur?… Knight school.
24. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Gladys…. Gladys, who?… Gladys the weekend—no homework!
25. What does Jack Frost like best about school?… Snow and tell. (Top Winter Jokes)
26. What is a math teacher’s favorite sum?… Summer! (Top Summer Jokes & Top Summer Jobs for Teachers)
27. Teacher: Why are you doing your multiplication on the floor? Student: You said we had to do it without tables! (Top Jokes for Math Teachers)
28. Why did the student eat his homework?… Because his teacher said it was a piece of cake.
29. Son: Mom, I got a hundred in school today! Mom: That’s great. What in? Son: A 40 in Reading and a 60 in Spelling.
30. What did the dentist give to the high school marching band?… A TUBA toothpaste.
31. What three candies can you find in every school?… Nerds, DumDums, and smarties.
32. Why did the student throw his watch out of the school window?… He wanted to see time fly
33. Why is a math book always unhappy?… Because it always has lots of problems.(Top Jokes for Math Teachers).
34. Why didn’t the skeleton go to the school dance?… He didn’t have anybody to take. (any BODY) (Top Biology Jokes)
35. Why was the biology book in the hospital?… Because it hurt his spine. (Top Biology Jokes)
36. Why did the music teacher need a ladder?… To reach the high notes.
37. Teacher: Class, we will have only half a day of school this morning. Class: Hooray! Teacher: We will have the other half this afternoon.
38. PUPIL: “Would you punish me for something I didn’t do?” TEACHER: “Of course not.” PUPIL: “Good, because I haven`t done my homework.”
39. Why did the cross-eyed teacher lose her job?… Because she couldn’t control her pupils?
40. What’s a teacher’s favorite nation?… Expla-nation.
41. Teachers who take class attendance are absent-minded.
42. Teacher: If I had ten apples in my right hand and nine in my left, what would I have?… Student: Huge hands! (Top Jokes for Math Teachers)
43. Teacher: I wish you’d pay a little attention! David: I’m paying as little as I can, teacher.
44. How did the geography student drown?… His grades were below C-level. (Top Geography Jokes)
45. Mom: What did you do at school today? Son: We did a guessing game. Mom: But I thought you were having a math exam. Son: That’s right!
46. Why was the principal worried?… Because there were too many rulers in school!
47. Why did the student take a ladder to school?… Because he/she was going to high school!
48. A son came home from his first day of school and his mother asks, “What did you learn today?” “Not enough,” he replies. “They said I have to go back tomorrow.”
49. What is a chalkboard’s favorite drink?… hot chalk-olate!
50. Why wasn’t the geometry teacher at school?… Because she sprained her angle!
51. What do you call a music teacher with problems?… a trebled man.
52. Teacher: What’s the chemical formula for water? Student: H I J K L M N O. Teacher: What are you talking about? Student: Didn’t you say it’s H to O (Top Chemistry Jokes)
53. What happened to the plant in math class?… It grew square roots. (Top Jokes for Math Teachers)
54. I heard they put a new wing on the school… That is true, but it still won’t fly.
55. How did the school custodian die?… He kicked the bucket.
56. What gets white as it gets dirty?… Chalkboard.
57. Name a bus you can never enter?… A syllabus.
58. Why do chemistry professors like to teach about ammonia?… Because it’s basic material.
59. Teacher: Why are the Middle Ages sometimes called the Dark Ages? Student: Because there were so many knights.
60. What did one math book say to the other?… Don’t bother me I’ve got my own problems!
61. Teacher: Can you tell us where the Declaration of Independence was signed? Student: At the bottom.
62. What do a chicken and a high school band have in common?….They both have drum sticks!
63. Teacher: You missed school yesterday, didn’t you? Student: Not very much
64. Teacher: I hope I didn’t see you looking at Maria’s exam. Student: I sure hope you didn’t, either!
65. Son: My teacher says I have to write more clearly. Mom: That’s a good idea. Son: No, it’s not. Then she’ll know I can’t spell.
66. Teacher: Why did you eat your homework? Student: Because I don’t have a dog
67. If you had 13 apples, 12 grapes, 3 pineapples and 3 strawberries, what would you have?… A delicious fruit salad.
68. A man from Los Angeles drove toward New York at 250 miles per hour and a man from New York drove toward Los Angeles at 150 m.p.h. Where did they meet?… In jail
69. Teacher: Can anyone give me a sentence with a direct object? Student: You are pretty. Teacher: What’s the direct object? Student: A good report card.
October 17, 2016
School Jokes: K – 12 School Jokes
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Jokes by Grade Level

Elementary School Jokes: Why are fish so smart?… They live in schools!
- “Kindergarten Jokes for Teachers” What flies around the kindergarten room at night?… The alpha-BAT
Middle School Jokes: Why are middle school cheerleaders on the bottom of the pyramid smarter than the ones at the top?… Because they understand.
High School Jokes: What school teaches you how to greet people?… Hi School.
Back to School Jokes: Teacher: Everybody hand in your homework, please. Students: Teacher, it’s the first day of school. We didn’t have any homework. Teacher: That’s right, and that’s the last excuse for not doing your homework that I’ll accept for the rest of the year.
Check out our Math Jokes, too!
Jokes by Subject

History Jokes

Top Social Studies Jokes
Science Jokes
April 19, 2016
Kindergarten Jokes: Kindergarten Jokes for Teachers
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School Jokes: Jokes for all grades
Top 3 Joke Pages
1. 180 School Jokes
2. Clean Jokes
3. 365 Family Friendly Jokes
Top Social Studies Jokes
School Jokes: The Best (& Worst) School Jokes for #Teachers
FREE U.S. History Lessons & Ideas

#1 Jokes for Teachers

My Town Tutors loves a good laugh. Over the years we have acquired many jokes that are school appropriate. In fact we wrote a blog 180 School Jokes! Start Your Day with a Smile! Also check out our Top 10 Jokes for Teachers!
1. What flies around the kindergarten room at night?… The alpha-BAT. (26 Lessons for the Letter of the Week A- Z)
2. What’s the best place to grow flowers in school?… In the kindergarden. (26 Lessons for the Letter of the Week A- Z)
3. What makes a Cyclops such an effective kindergarten teacher?… He has only one pupil.
4. Why are fish so smart?… They live in schools!
5. What is a snake’s favorite class?… Hissss-tory! (Great Lessons for Psychology and U.S. History lessons)
6. What kind of school do you go to if you’re an ice cream man?… Sundae school
7. Why did the M&M go to school?… Because he really wanted to be a Smartie!
8. What is a witch’s favorite class?… Spelling (Is Spelling Important? phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid)
9. Why was the kindergarten teacher wearing sunglasses to school?… She had bright students!
10. What is the only class you can plant a flower in?…Kindergarden!
11. What’s the king of all school supplies?… The ruler.
12. Why did the student eat his homework?… Because his teacher said it was a piece of cake.
13. A student came into his kindergarten class with a squirming worm. “What are you doing with that disgusting worm?” asked his teacher. “We were playing outside and I thought I’d show him my kindergarten.” the student replied.
14. Son: I won a prize in kindergarten today. The teacher asked me how many legs a hippopotamus had. I said three. Father: Three? How on earth did you win the prize? Son: I came the closest.
15. Why was the kindergarten worried?… Because there were too many rulers in school!
16. What did one math book say to the other?… Don’t bother me I’ve got my own problem
17. ONE morning my five-year-old niece was taking forever to get dressed for school. Her mother finally decided to help her. “What’s the matter, Martha?” her mother asked. “You’re going to be late, and you don’t want to miss school.” “I’d rather stay home and miss school,” a little voice answered forlornly, “than go to school and miss home.”
18. Why was the music teacher not able to open his class room?… Because his keys were on the piano.
19. What object is king of the classroom?… The ruler!
20. Where do pencils go for vacation?… Pencil-vania.
21. What did 0 say to 8?… Nice belt!
22. Why do traffic lights turn red?… You would too if you had to stop and go in the middle of the street.
23. Teacher: In this box, I have a 10-foot snake. Student: You can’t fool me, teacher. Snakes don’t have feet.
24. Where do fish sleep?… In water beds.
JOKES BY LETTERS

Aa What do you call an Ant in outerspace? An ant-ronaut.
Bb What do Texas ghosts wear? BOOts!
Cc What do Cows listen to? Moo-sic.
Dd Why did the chicken join the band? Because he had Drumsticks.

Ee Why did the chicken cross the road? For some Egg-citement.
Ff What day do chickens hate the most? Fry-day.
Gg What do you call a bug that jumps over cups? A Glasshopper.
Hh – Why do Hens lay eggs? Because if they dropped them, they’d break.
Ii – How do you keep from getting Icy feet? Don’t go around brrrrr-foot.
Jj – What fish make the best sandwich? A peanut butter and jellyfish.
Kk – What do kittens like to eat? Mice cream.
Ll – What do sea monsters eat for Lunch? Fish and ships.
Mm – Why didn’t the Mummy cross the road? He was gutless.
Nn – Why did the horse cross the road? To visit his Naaaa-bor.
Oo – Why kind of ice cream do Oreo cows make? Chocolate and vanilla swirl.
Pp – What do you get when a Pig and chicken bump into each other? Ham and eggs.
Qq – Why don’t ducks tell jokes when they fly? Because they would Quack up!
Rr – What are Raisons? Sunburt grapes.
Ss – Why did the Slimy Smelly SSSSSnake Slither by the Stop Sign to crosssss the Street? To See hissssss Skinny Stinkin Sister.
Tt – What do you get when you cross an elephant with a fish? Swimming Trunks.
Uu – What do you call a sad Unicorn? A blue corn.
Vv – What do you call a cute Volcano? Lava-ble.
Ww – What do you call a Worm in a fur coat? A catterpillar.
Xx – What is the difference between a foX and an oX? The letter f.
Yy – What happened when the cat ate a ball of Yarn? It had mittens.
Zz – What’s black and white and red all over? A sunburned Zebra
March 22, 2016