Wisconsin Jokes

by | Dec 19, 2019 | Latest News, School Jokes | 0 comments

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More Wisconsin Jokes….

  1. Knock knock?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best Wisconsin jokes.
  2. How do you know a man is from Wisconsin?… He owes more money on his snowmobile than his car.
  3. 2024 Election Goal of Donald Trump and Kamala Harris… Turn Wisconsin into WisconWIN. (2024 Election Jokes)
  4. 2024 Election Goal of Republicans and Democrats… Turn Wisconsin into WisconWIN. (2024 Election Jokes)
  5. What is Rudolph’s favorite NBA basketball team?… The Milwaukee Bucks. (Christmas Jokes & Wisconsin Jokes)
  6. How do you get into a house in Wisconsin?… With a Mil wauk KEY!
  7. What is Avogadro’s favorite basketball team?… the Molewaukee Bucks.
  8. What is Avogadro’s favorite baseball team?… the Molewaukee Brewers. (Baseball Jokes)
  9. Can you name the capital of Wisconsin?… “W”
  10. What did Lake Winnebago say to the shore?… Nothing, it waved. (15 Best Lakes in Wisconsin)
  11. What is the tallest building in?… Wisconsin Public Library of course, it has the most stories! (Library Jokes)
  12. What goes hundreds of miles and never moves?… The Wisconsin Turnpike!
  13. Where do fish keep their money?… In the riverbanks of the Mississippi River. (Ten Longest Rivers in Wisconsin)
  14. What has a mouth but can’t eat?… The Wisconsin River!
  15. What runs but never goes out of breath?… Rock River! (Geography Jokes for Kids)
  16. If a plane crashed on the borders of Wisconsin and Michigan where would they bury the survivors?… You wouldn’t bury them anywhere because survivors are the people who lived! (Geography Jokes for Kids)
  17. Did you hear the joke about Teton Range?… You won’t get over it. (Hiking Jokes & Wisconsin Mountains)
  18. Teacher: Where were you born? Student: Wisconsin. Teacher: Which part? Student: What do you mean, ‘which part’? My whole body was born in Wisconsin! (Teacher Jokes)
  19. Did you hear the joke about Blue Mounds?… You won’t get over it. (Hiking Jokes & Wisconsin Mountains)
  20. Why does a Badgers fan pour his cereal on a plate?… He lost his bowls.
  21. What do they call students who go to Marquette?… Rejects from the University of Wisconsin-Madison. Advertisement
  23. Wisconsin, where the elevation is usually a bigger number than the town’s population. (Hiking Jokes)
  24. A cowboy and his blind horse: A man is casually crossing the Wisconsin plains when his horse died all of the sudden. The nearest town was three days walk. So, he started to walk. 3 days later he ends up in this quiet ‘ol town but nobody had a horse for sale. So he commenced to walking to the closest town which was a two days journey. Unfortunately, nobody in that town had a horse for sale, however, he did come across this stable where the fellow runnin’ it mentioned his brother in a nearby Town had a horse for sale. He commenced to walk to this next town and 2 DAYS LATER found the guy’s brother. “I talked to your brother two days walk from here and he says you might have a horse to sell me.” “Yes I do have a horse for sale,” He replied, “But he don’t look so good.” “I don’t care. I’ll take him anyways. I’ve been walking for damn near a week now. I’m tired and I need a horse.” So he gets on the horse and the horse takes off and bumps into a tree and stops. “Heyyy, something’s wrong with this horse. I think he’s blind. YOU SOLD ME A BLIND HORSE MISTER!” “I told you Sir, THE HORSE DON’T LOOK SO GOOD!”
  25. How can you spot a Packers fan?… They refer to the team as “we.”
  26. How do you know it’s under 32 degrees outside in Wisconsin?… People have finally stopped wearing shorts.
  27. How does someone from Wisconsin know someone is from Illinois?… They can tell by his accent.
  28. How many freezers does someone from Wisconsin have?… one in the kitchen, one in the basement, and one in the back of a pickup truck.
  29. How do you know it’s winter in Wisconsin?… You’ve gotten sunburn and frostbite in the same week.
  30. What are the three spices that Wisconsinites use?… Salt, pepper and ketchup.
  31. What do Wisconsin women wear for lingerie?… A flannel shirt.
  32. Tourist: “Lived in this town all your life?” Wisconsin Resident: “No, not yet.”
  33. Tourist: “Nice little town — so old and quaint. Must be a lot of odd characters around here, though, right?” Wisconsin Resident: “Oh yes, quite a few. You see ’em around. But they’re mostly gone after Labor Day.” (Labor Day Jokes & Travel Blogs)
  34. Hawaii is hosting a party for all the states. Hawaii says, “be there or be square!” Unfortunately, Colorado and Wyoming didn’t attend. (Hawaii Jokes & Colorado Jokes)
  35. Where do Wisconsin elementary school sports teams buy their uniforms?… New Jersey? (Elementary School Jokes)
  36. Where do Wisconsin middle school sports teams buy their uniforms?… New Jersey? (Middle School Jokes)
  37. Where do Wisconsin high school sports teams buy their uniforms?… New Jersey? (High School Jokes)
  38. Why did the Wisconsin teacher jump into the pool?… She wanted to test the water! (Teacher Jokes & Swimming Jokes for Kids)
  39. Why did the Wisconsin teacher jump into the lake?… She wanted to test the water! (Teacher Jokes & Swimming Jokes for Kids)
  40. Why did the Wisconsin teacher jump into the ocean?… She wanted to test the water! (Teacher Jokes & Ocean Jokes)
  41. Why did the Wisconsin teacher jump into the river?… She wanted to test the water! (Teacher Jokes & Swimming Jokes for Kids)
  42. What did Wisconsin see?… the same thing Arkansas.
  43. Did you hear about the power outage at the University of Wisconsin library?… Thirty students were stuck on the escalator for three hours.
  44. Wisconsin: Go Away And Leave Us Alone
  45. A Wisconsin man walks into a library. (That’s the whole joke)
  46. Did you hear about the fire in University of Wisconsin’s football dorm that destroyed 20 books?… The real tragedy was that 15 hadn’t been colored yet.
  47. A retired Wisconsin man was jailed for refusing to nap… He was resisting a rest. (Napping Jokes)
  48. How did you find the weather on your Wisconsin vacation?… I just went outside and there it was.
  49. Mountains)
  50. A 5th grader from Wisconsin and a 5th grader from New York City got into a fight. Who won?… The 5th grader from Wisconsin, because he’s 18 years old.
  51. A woman from Wisconsin who fell in love with the DJ from her first wedding day has married him five years later… she originally asked him three years ago, but he said he wasn’t taking requests just then. (Marriage Jokes)
  52. What are the preferred pronouns in Wisconsin?… He/Haw.
  53. An Wisconsin man home and found his house on fire, rushed next door, telephoned the fire department and shouted, “Hurry on over here. My house is on fire!” “OK,” replied the fireman, “how do we get there?” “Say, don’t you still have them big red trucks?” (Fireman Jokes)
  54. A guy goes into a bar and asks the bartender if he wants to hear a good Wisconsin joke. The bartender says, “Before you tell it, you should know that I am 6-2 and weigh 225 and I’m from Wisconsin. See that guy at the end of the bar? He’s 6-4 and weighs 250 and he’s from Wisconsin, too. And see the guy at the other end of the bar? He’s 6-6 and weighs 280 and he’s from Wisconsin, too! Now, do you still want to tell your Wisconsin joke?” The guy says, “Nah.” To which the bartender smiles and says, “What’s the matter? Are ya chicken?” The guy says, “Nah. I just don’t want to have to explain it three times.”
  55. Wisconsin: We’re not sure who is dumber – the politicians or the voters. (Election Jokes)
  56. Wisconsin: America hates us because America ain’t us.
  57. Why do folks in Wisconsin go to the movie theater in groups of 18 or more?… because 17 and under not admitted. (Movie Jokes)
  58. An Wisconsin man was arrested for stealing a truck filled with $56,000 worth of Campbell’s soup…. I, for one, hope this guy goes away for ‘Mmm, mmm, good!’
  59. If a plane crashed on the borders of Wisconsin and Michigan., where would they bury the survivors?… You wouldn’t bury them anywhere because survivors are the people who lived! (Geography Jokes for Kids & Plane Jokes)
  60. If you have ever refused to buy something because it’s “too spendy,”… you might live in Wisconsin.
  61. If a plane crashed on the borders of Wisconsin and Illinois, where would they bury the survivors?… You wouldn’t bury them anywhere because survivors are the people who lived! (Geography Jokes for Kids & Plane Jokes)
  62. If a plane crashed on the borders of Wisconsin and Minnesota where would they bury the survivors?… You wouldn’t bury them anywhere because survivors are the people who lived! (Geography Jokes for Kids & Plane Jokes)
  63. If a plane crashed on the borders of Wisconsin and Iowa where would they bury the survivors?… You wouldn’t bury them anywhere because survivors are the people who lived! (Geography Jokes for Kids & Plane Jokes)
  64. Did you guys hear about that girl they found murdered in Wisconsin?… They found her covered in milk with cheerios still in her mouth… They think it was a cereal killer. (Cereal Jokes)
  65. What runs but never goes out of breath?… Menominee River. (Wisconsin Rivers)
  66. A cowboy and his blind horse: A man is casually crossing the Wisconsin plains when his horse died all of the sudden. The nearest town was three days walk. So, he started to walk. 3 days later he ends up in this quiet ‘ol town but nobody had a horse for sale. So he commenced to walking to the closest town which was a two days journey. Unfortunately, nobody in that town had a horse for sale, however, he did come across this stable where the fellow runnin’ it mentioned his brother in a nearby Town had a horse for sale. He commenced to walk to this next town and 2 DAYS LATER found the guy’s brother. “I talked to your brother two days walk from here and he says you might have a horse to sell me.” “Yes I do have a horse for sale,” He replied, “But he don’t look so good.” “I don’t care. I’ll take him anyways. I’ve been walking for damn near a week now. I’m tired and I need a horse.” So he gets on the horse and the horse takes off and bumps into a tree and stops. “Heyyy, something’s wrong with this horse. I think he’s blind. YOU SOLD ME A BLIND HORSE MISTER!” “I told you Sir, THE HORSE DON’T LOOK SO GOOD!”
  67. Wisconsin is a joke that writes itself.
  68. What do you call road kill in Wisconsin?… Breakfast.
  69. What is a Wisconsin cloud’s favorite drink?… Mountain Dew. (Hiking Jokes & Skiing Jokes)
  70. Knock knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe spell Wisconsin? 
  71. Nightmares in other states are just visions of what’s really going on in Wisconsin.
  72. Why did the University of Wisconsin regents decide to cover Camp Randall Stadium in cardboard?… Because the Crimson Tide always look better on paper.
  73. Why is “The Wave” banned in Camp Randall Stadium?… Two Wisconsin fans drowned last year.
  74. Why can’t Wisconsin mountains and play hide and seek?… Because they like to peak.
  75. Knock knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name the capital of Wisconsin? (State Capitals)
  76. I’m absolutely disgusted with the state my life is in right now Wisconsin. I live in Wisconsin
  77. Knock knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name the most populated city in Wisconsin?  
  78. Knock knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name the least populated city in Wisconsin?  
  79. Knock knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name the highest mountain in Wisconsin? (Hiking Jokes)  
  80. Knock knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name the longest river in Wisconsin?  
  81. Knock knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name the two senators from Wisconsin? 
  82. Knock knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name the governor of Wisconsin?
  83. Knock knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name the representatives from Wisconsin?  
  84. Knock knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe visit Wisconsin?  
  85. Knock knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name the colleges and universities in Wisconsin? (Top U.S. Colleges)
  86. Knock knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe you tell me the cost of the University of Wisconsin? (Top U.S. Colleges)
  87. What did the Wisconsin flag say to the American flag?… Nothing. It waved!
  88. Why should the University of Wisconsin change it’s team name to the opossums?…  Because they play dead at home and get killed on the road.
  89. Knock knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe give me the name of a great restaurant Wisconsin?   
  90. Knock knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe tell me the cost of living Wisconsin?  
  91. Knock knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe tell me some good lakes in Wisconsin? 
  92. Knock knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name the mascot of the University of Wisconsin? (College Mascots)
  93. Knock knock?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best jokes about Wisconsin.
  94. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Noah… Noah, who?… Noah good joke about Wisconsin?
  95. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know how to tell a good Wisconsin knock-knock joke?
  96. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know any good Wisconsin knock knock jokes? (June Jokes & Spring Knock Knock Jokes)
  97. Why should you never buy golf equipment made in Wisconsin?… Because Wisconsin drivers are terrible. (Golf Jokes & Car Jokes)
  98. I have the heart of a lion… And a lifetime ban from the Wisconsin Zoo. (Zoo Jokes)
  99. How do the zebras at the Wisconsin Zoo play baseball?… Three stripes and you’re out! (Baseball Jokes)
  100. What do you call a dishonest cat at the Wisconsin Zoo?… Lion. (Oregon Jokes & Zoo Jokes)
  101. Why won’t any of Wisconsin’s bicycles stand up by themselves?… They are two tired. (Bike Jokes)
  102. In what state does the Willamette River flow?… Liquid. 
  103. What is a Wisconsin’s mountain favorite type of candy?… Snow caps. (Hiking Jokes & Candy Jokes)
  104. Over the summer, Wisconsin is expected to break the hottest temperatures ever recorded in its entire history, some places as hot as 122°F… NOT cool. (Summer Jokes & Heat Wave Jokes)
  105. Speaking of driving… Wisconsinroads are adventurous because no one knows how to drive.
  106. Over the winter, Wyoming is expected to break the coldest temperatures ever recorded in its entire history, some places as hot as -67°F… NOT cool.. FREEZING. (Winter Jokes)
  107. Why is a River Liffey rich? …. Because it has two banks.
  108. What do you call a bounty hunter from the South?… Bubba Fett.
  109. Hawaii is hosting a party for all the states. Hawaii says, “be there or be square!” Unfortunately, Colorado and Wyoming didn’t attend. (Hawaii Jokes & Colorado Jokes)
  110. What did Florida see?… The same thing Arkansas. (Top 50 State Jokes)
  111. In the news, Florida had it’s first remote trial via zoom… It looks like things will be settled out of court. (Lawyer Jokes)
  112. A Florida man was arrested for stealing a truck filled with $56,000 worth of Campbell’s soup…. I, for one, hope this guy goes away for ‘Mmm, mmm, good!’
  113. How many Wisconsin men do you need before you can make change for a dollar?… You can’t. Nobody in Wisconsinhas any cents.
  114. What is a Wisconsin’s clouds favorite drink?… Mountain Dew. (Hiking Jokes & Skiing Jokes)
  115. What does the average Wisconsin high school student get on his SAT?… Drool. (College Jokes)
  116. Why do Wisconsin students have TGIF on their shoes?… Toes Go In First!
  117. No, really. I’ve been holding my breath for someone in Wisconsin to use their turn signal and I haven’t breathed since 2005. (Car Jokes)
  118. How do you get a man in Wisconsin to do sit-ups?… Put the remote control between his toes.
  119. Nightmares in other states are just visions of what’s really going on in Wisconsin.
  120. How many University of Wisconsin freshman does it take to change a light bulb?… None, it’s a sophomore course.
  121. Wisconsin: If You Don’t Ski, Don’t Bother! (Skiing Jokes)
  122. Tourist: “Nice little town — so old and quaint. Must be a lot of odd characters around here, though, right?” Wisconsin Resident: “Oh yes, quite a few. You see ’em around. But they’re mostly gone after Labor Day.” (Labor Day Jokes & Travel Blogs)
  123. No, really. I’ve been holding my breath for someone in Wisconsin to use their turn signal… I haven’t breathed since 2005. (Car Jokes)
  124. Tourist: “Lived in this town all your life?” Wisconsin Resident: “No, not yet.”
  125. Divorced couples in Wisconsin are having trouble deciding who gets the Marijuana… The judges have started issuing joint custody. (Divorce Jokes)
  126. What do you call the 2014 event between two cities that legalized marijuana?… The Super Bowl.
  127. Yes, marijuana is legal in Wisconsin… now leaf the jokes alone.
  128. How do you get a man in Wisconsin to do sit-ups?… Put the remote control between his toes.
  129. What does the average University of Wisconsin student get on his SAT?… Drool.