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August Guest Blogs

Joke Pages of the Month:

  1. Knock knockout?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best August jokes. (August Knock Knock Jokes)
  2. August 2nd: National Ice Cream Sandwich Day: What kind of snack do you have during a scary movie?…. I scream (ice cream). (Field Trip Jokes for Kids & Ice Cream Jokes)
  3. August 3rd National Watermelon Day: Top 10 Watermelon Jokes: Why do watermelons have fancy weddings?…  Because they cantaloupe. (Wedding Jokes)
  4. August 4th Top 10 Chocolate Chip Cookie Jokes: My grandmother bakes chocolate chip cookies the fastest… It literally takes her nana-seconds. (Grandparent Jokes)
  5. Is today really August? …Or are Julying to me? (July Jokes)
  6. Top 10 August Jokes: Knock, knock?… Who is there?… August… August Who?… A gust of wind over 74 MPH could be the start of a hurricane! (Hurricane Jokes)
  7. Top 10 Summer Olympics Jokes: Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Woo… Woo, who?… What are you cheering for in at the Summer Olympics in Paris? (Summer Olympic Knock Knock Jokes)
  8. Top 10 Back to School JokesOn the first day of school, what did the teacher say her three favorite words were?… June, July & August. (Back to School Jokes & Top 10 Jokes for Each Month)
  9. Top 10 Hurricane JokesWhat did the Hurricane say to coast?… I have my eye on you. (Biology Jokes)
  10. Our sailing trip in Maine was going great… until we were capsized by Augusta wind. (Maine Jokes & Sailing Jokes)
  11. Do you hear what is big in Africa right now?… Elephants. (World Geography Jokes)
  12. August 12th World Elephant Day: Top 10 Elephant Jokes: Why were the swimming elephants thrown out of the Olympics?… Because they couldn’t keep their trunks up! (Summer Olympic Jokes)
  13. Don’t June know it’s August? (June Jokes)
  14. Hurricane Jokes: When Hurricane Ernesto hit Puerto Rico in August of 2024?… It was a PR disaster. 
  15. Looking for a hot date?… Pick any day in August, they don’t get much hotter than that! (Heat Wave Jokes)
  16. 101 Little League World Series Jokes: Teacher: Johnny, what are the last words of “The Star-Spangled Banner”?… Student: “Play ball”? (Flag Day Jokes for Kids)
  17. Everyone keeps posting about Mayweather, but I’m 99% sure it’s August. (Boxing Jokes)
  18. What do you call a snowman in August?… A puddle. (Christmas Jokes for Kids)
  19. Wow, it’s August 2020? This year flu by………………………. (Covid Jokes)
  20. August 19th: Full Sturgeon Moon Jokes My favorite phase of the moon is croissant moon! (Croissant Jokes & Full Moon Jokes)
  21. The doctor has given me two months to live. I’ve chosen August and December, because I like summer but don’t want to miss Christmas. (Summer Jokes & Christmas Jokes)
  22. Me and my childhood crush are marrying next year… Hers is in January and mine in August! (Wedding Jokes & Top 10 Jokes for Each Month)
  23. 101 Little League World Series Jokes: What did the baseball glove say to the ball?…”Catch ya later!”
  24. My wife and I just had a daughter and named her JuneJulyAugust… We call her Summer for short. (Top 10 Jokes for Each Month & Baby Jokes)
  25. Don’t June know it’s August?… I can’t December. (December Jokes)
  26. Knock, knock?… Who is there?… August… August Who?… A gust of wind blew my homework away! (180 School Jokes)
  27. What did October say to August?… Wake me up when September ends! (Top 10 Jokes for Each Month & Music Jokes)
  28. Full Moon Jokes: Knock Knock!… Who’s there?… Candy!… Candy who?… Candy cow jump over the moon? (Cow Jokes & Candy Jokes)
  29. National Cinema Day:
  30. 101 Little League World Series Jokes: Why did the police officer go to the baseball game?… Someone stole second base! (Police Jokes for Kids)
  31. Knock! Knock!… Who is there?… Teddy!… Teddy who?… Teddy (today) is the first day of school! (Knock Knock Jokes for Kids & Jokes for the 1st Day of School)
  32. Knock, knock?… Who is there?… August… August Who?… A gusta go watch the Super Bowl! (Super Bowl Jokes)
  33. August Full Moon Jokes: Astronomers got tired after watching the Sturgeon Moon go around the earth for 24 hours… So they called it a day.
  34. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Noah… Noah who?… Noah more summer vacation – it’s time for school! (Knock Knock Jokes for Kids & Jokes for the 1st Day of School)
  35. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Noah… Noah, who?… Noah good joke about August? (Top 10 Jokes for Each Month)
  36. A man walks up to the counter. “Two pairs of underwear please.” The man behind the counter looks at him in disbelief. “Only two pairs of underwear?” “Yup. I wear one while the other is in the wash.” The man behind the counter looks at him in disgust, then rings out his order. A second man walks in. “5 pairs of underwear please.” “Only 5 eh?” “Yeah, I wear one for every weekday, then go commando all the weekend.” The man behind the counter shakes his head. “Well, you’re better then the last guy!” A third man walks in. “7 pairs of underwear please.” “Finally, a man who knows hygiene!” “Yes, I do try. One for every day, and I do my laundry on Sunday.” At the end of the day, a fourth man walks into the underwear store. “12 pairs of underwear please.” “Wow! You must be really clean!” The man smiles. “Yup, that’s me! Err, hang on, let me see if I counted right. January, February, March, April…” (Top 10 Jokes for Each Month)
  37. Knock, knock?… Who is there?… August… August Who?… Augustus was a Roman statesman and military leader who was the first emperor of the Roman Empire, reigning from 27 BC until his death in AD 14. (Ides of March Jokes)
  38. August 3rd Watermelon Day Jokes: When do you go at red and stop at green?… When you’re eating a watermelon. (Summer Jokes for Kids)
  39. Friday August 13th: Friday the 13th JokesWhat’s Jason Voorhees favorite bean?… A human bean!
  40. August 4th: Chocolate Chip Cookie DayWhat kind of keys do kids like to carry?… Chocolate Chip Cookies!
  41. My wife’s panties are labelled ‘Monday’, ‘Tuesday’, ‘Wednesday’ … My underwear is labelled ‘January’, February’, ‘March’… (Top 10 Jokes for Each Month & Marriage Jokes)
  42. Knock, knock?… Who is there?… August… August Who?… A gust of wind knocked me over! 
  43. August 9th: Shark Week Which sharks would you find at a construction site?… Hammerhead sharks. (Top 10 Shark Jokes)
  44. August 2nd: Shark Week What does a shark like to eat with peanut butter sandwiches?… Jellyfish. (Peanut Butter Jokes & Top 10 Shark Jokes)
  45. My childhood crush and I are finally getting married this year! Me in August, and her in November.
  46. August 3rd: Shark Week Which sharks do you find in heaven?… Angel sharks. (Top 10 Shark Jokes)
  47. August 12th: World Elephant DayWhy didn’t the elephant buy a suitcase for his summer vacation?… Because he already had a trunk! (Elephant Jokes for Kids)
  48. August 4th: Shark Week What do you call a solitary shark?… A “lone” (loan) shark. (Top 10 Shark Jokes)
  49. Knock, knock?… Who is there?… August… August Who?… A gust of wind is helpful when flying a kite!
  50. Knock, knock?… Who is there?… August… August Who?… A gust of wind is helpful when sailing! (Sailing Jokes)
  51. Knock, knock?… Who is there?… August… August Who?… A gust of wind is helpful when windsurfing.
  52. Knock, knock?… Who is there?… August… August Who?… A gusta go to the bathroom before we go!
  53. On the first day of school, what did the teacher say her three favorite words were?… June, July & August. (Back to School Jokes & Top 10 Jokes for Each Month)
  54. Knock, knock?… Who is there?… August… August Who?… A gusta go back to school shopping! (Back to School Jokes)
  55. Knock, knock?… Who is there?… August… August Who?… A gusta go back to school! (Back to School Jokes)
  56. Knock, knock?… Who is there?… August… August Who?… A gusta go back to football practice! (Football Jokes)
  57. Knock, knock?… Who is there?… August… August Who?… A gusta go back to soccer practice! (Soccer Jokes)
  58. Knock, knock?… Who is there?… August… August Who?… A gusta go back to volleyball practice! (Volleyball Jokes)
  59. Knock, knock?… Who is there?… August… August Who?… A gusta go back to cross country practice!
  60. Knock, knock?… Who is there?… August… August Who?… A gusta go back to field hockey practice!
  61. Knock, knock?… Who is there?… August… August Who?… A gusta go back to cheerleading practice!
  62. Which sharks would you find at a construction site?… Hammerhead sharks. (Top 10 Shark Jokes)
  63. August 31st: International Bacon Day: What did the pig say at the beach on a hot summer’s day?… I’m bacon! (Summer Jokes) (Bacon Jokes)
  64. Back to School Jokes: A book never written: “When Does School Start?” by Wendy Belrings.
  65. Back to School Jokes: Student: The first day of school is always special to me. It’s the only day of the year when I’m not behind in my homework. (Jokes for the 1st Day of School)
  66. Why is Alabama the smartest state?… Because it has 4 A’s and 1 B! (Top 50 State Jokes)
    Back to School Jokes: Mother: How did you find school on the 1st day today? Daughter: I just got off the bus and there it was! (Mother’s Day Jokes)
  67. Full Moon Jokes: Why wasn’t the moon hungry?… Because it was full! (Astronomy Jokes for Kids &Full Moon Names & Meanings 1)
  68. Back to School Jokes: The first day of school is exciting, but so is riding a roller coaster, and I wouldn’t want to do that for nine months in a row either.
  69. Back to School Jokes: Teacher: What would happen if you took the school bus home? Student: The police would make you bring it back! (Police Jokes for Kids)
  70. Wow, it’s August 2021? This year flu by………………………. (Covid Jokes)
  71. The Assassination of Julius Caesar: Caesar was famously killed on the Ides of March, but he wasn’t expecting the attack until August 2. His final words embodied his dismay over the scheduling confusion: “8/2, Brute…”
  72. Do fish go on vacation in August?… No because they’re always in school!
  73. Where do sharks go for vacation in August?… Finland!
  74. What do you call a Labrador at the beach in August?… A hot dog!