School Jokes: Biology Jokes for School

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Funny Jokes for Each Month 

Jokes for ALL GradesSchool Jokes by Subject

Top Biology Jokes for Teachers

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  1. Did you hear about the marathon runner who ran for three hours but only moved two feet?… He only had two feet! (101 Sports Jokes  for Kids)
  2. What kind of chain is edible?…. A food chain! (Food Jokes)
  3. What do you call a FISH with no Eyes?… A FSH.  (Animal Jokes for Kids)
  4. Why didn’t the skeleton go to the school dance?… He didn’t have anybody to take. (any BODY) (Top Halloween Jokes180 School Jokes)
  5. Why was the biology book in the hospital?…Because it hurt his spine. (180 School Jokes)
  6. Why was the scuba diver failing Biology?… Because he was below “C” level. (Geography Jokes for Kids)
  7. What do you call the leader of a biology gang?… The nucleus.
  8. My son came home from school and said, “My teacher gave me a B for my biology practical.” I said, “That’s good.” He said, “Not really. Everyone else got a frog to cut up.” (180 School Jokes & Bee Jokes)
  9. How much did it cost for a pirate to pierce his ears? … a buck an ear (a buccaneer)! (Top Pirate Jokes)
  10. What did one eye say to the other eye?… Something between us smells!
  11. Why did the skeleton go to the piano store?… To buy some organs!
  12. Why do noses run but feet smell?
  13. Why did the skeleton hold up the barbecue?…He needed a spare rib. (Summer Joke for Kids)
  14. What type of flowers does everybody have?… Two-lips. (Holiday Jokes for Kids)
  15. One plant says to another, “Are you hungry?”… The other replies, “I could use a light snack.”
  16. Why is your nose in the middle of your face? … Because it is the “scenter.” / Center!
  17. What was the biologist wearing on his first date?… Designer genes
  18. What did one cell say to his sister cell when she stepped in his toe?… Ouch, Mitosis!
  19. Why are frogs so happy?… Because they can eat whatever bugs them! (Animal Jokes for Kids)
  20. We just hired a micro-biologist… Man, is he small.
  21. Which biochemicals wash up on beaches?… Nucleotides. (Summer Jokes for Kids)
  22. What’s the difference between a dog and a marine biologist?… One wags a tail and the other tags a whale. (World Ocean’s Day JokesDog Jokes for Kids)
  23. I don’t know what carbon dating is, but I’ll try anything at this point… (Holiday Jokes for Kids)
  24. Why are environmentalists bad at playing cards?… They like to avoid the flush.
  25. How does Juliet maintain a constant body temperature?… Romeostasis. (Holiday Jokes for Kids & English Jokes)
  26. What do you call the union of a sheep and a ram?… A zygoat. (Animal Jokes for Kids)
  27. You enter the laboratory and see an experiment. How will you know which class is it?… If it’s green and wiggles, it’s biology… If it stinks, it’s chemistry… If it doesn’t work, it’s physics.
  28. Two blood cells met and married, but alas it was all in vein.
  29. We have to stop talking about mitosis… It’s such a divisive issue.
  30. Why couldn’t the plants escape prison?… Because their cells were surrounded by walls.
  31. Did you hear about the famous microbiologist who traveled in thirty different countries and learned to speak six languages?… He was a man of many cultures. (Top Geography Jokes)
  32. A red blood cell walked into a busy restaurant. The hostess asked, “Would you like to sit at the bar?” The red cell replied, “No thanks, I’ll just circulate.”
  33. What was the biologist wearing on his first date?… Designer jeans.
  34. Where do hippos go to university?… Hippocampus. (Top College Jokes)
  35. What do you call a place of worship made out of amino acids?… A cysteine chapel.
  36. What do you call an oral hygiene product for the brain?… Neural Crest.
  37. How do you call a member of the financial staff of the faculty of Biology?… A Buy-ologist.
  38. Where do they send the criminal neurons?… To the chain ganglion.
  39. What kind of notebook does a dendrochronologist use?… A tree-ring binder. (Top 10 Arbor Day Jokes180 School Jokes)
  40. How do you identify a bald eagle?… All his feathers are combed over to one side. (Top 500 Jokes for U.S. States)
  41. A guy accidentally ingested some alpha-L-glucose but he had no ill effect… Apparently he was ambidextrose.
  42. Biology is the only science in which multiplication is the same thing as division.
  43. What do biologists wear on their heads when playing football?… Helminth. (365 Sports JokesTop Football Jokes)
  44. What’s a pirate’s favorite amino acid?… Arrrrrr-ginine. (Top Pirate Jokes)
  45. What do you call a faulty spirometer?… Expired.
  46. What did the femur say to the patella?… I kneed you. (Top Valentine’s Day Jokes)
  47. How many biologists does it take to change a light bulb?… Four. One to change it and three to write the environmental-impact statement.
  48. When you breath, you inspire. When you do not breath, you expire.
  49. How do you eat DNA-spaghetti?… With a replication fork. (Meatball Jokes)
  50. A bacteriologist is a man whose conversation always starts with the germ of an idea.
  51. How did the English major define microtome on his biology exam?… An itsy bitsy book.
  52. How do you know you’re dehydrated?… You can hear your red blood cells crenating.
  53. What’s the study of real estate?.. Homology.
  54. A couple of biologists had twins… One they called John and the other control.
  55. What did the male stamen say to the female pistil?… I like your “style!”
  56. If I go to jail, my nickname will be mitochondria so I’m the power house of the cell.
  57. How does the nucleus communicate with ribosomes?… With a cell phone.
  58. A lonely frog, desperate for some form of company telephoned the Psychic Hotline to find out what his future holds. His Personal Psychic Advisor tells him, “You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you.” The frog is thrilled and says, “This is great! Where will I meet her, at work, at a party?” “No” says the psychic, “in a Biology class.”
  59. How did the herpetologist know he would be married soon?… He caught the garter snake.
  60. Did you hear the one about the recycling family of triplets?… Polly, Ethel and Ian.
  61. What do you call cabs which provide drug therapy?… Chemotaxis.

 

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