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We have heard some great jokes over the years. Here is a list of the top 5 jokes for each day / category. Click on the link to see a list of all the jokes!
- Why did Humpty Dumpty have a great fall?… To make up for his miserable summer. (Top Summer Jokes)
- What did the tree say to autumn?… Leave me alone.
- How do you fix a broken pumpkin?… With a pumpkin patch.
- What reads and lives in an apple?… A bookworm.
- What is a tree’s least favorite month?… Sep-timber! (September Jokes)
- Did you hear the joke about the baseball?… It will leave you in stitches!
- What did the baseball glove say to the ball?…”Catch ya later!”
- Which baseball player holds water?…The pitcher.
- Why are some umpires fat?…They always clean their plate!
- Why are spiders good baseball players?… Because they know how to catch flies!
- Why are baseball games at night?… Because bats sleep during the day! (Bats at the Beach is a Great Summer Book!)
- Why did the police officer go to the baseball game?… Someone stole second base!
- Is There Baseball In Heaven? Two old men had been best friends for years, and they both live to their early 90′s, when one of them suddenly falls deathly ill. His friend comes to visit him on his deathbed, and they’re reminiscing about their long friendship, when the dying man’s friend asks, “Listen, when you die, do me a favor. I want to know if there’s baseball in heaven.” The dying man said, “We’ve been friends for years, this I’ll do for you.” And then he dies. A couple days later, his surviving friend is sleeping when he hears his friend’s voice. The voice says, “I’ve got some good news and some bad news. The good news is that there’s baseball in heaven.” “What’s the bad news?” “You’re pitching on Wednesday.”
- Have you ever seen a line drive?… No but I have seen a baseball park!
- “Did you hear the joke about the fast pitch?”… ”Forget it. You just missed it.”
- When is the best time to go to the dentist?… At tooth-hurty (2:30). (180 School Jokes & 365 School Jokes)
- What does the dentist of the year get?… A little plaque.
- Why did the deer need braces?… He had buck teeth.
- Why did the king go to the dentist?… To get a new crown! (Top Social Studies Jokes)
- What was the dentist doing in Panama?… Looking for the Root Canal! (Top Geography Jokes)
October 10th: Columbus Day: Columbus Day Jokes
- Where did Columbus first land in America?… On his feet! (Top Biology Jokes)
- Columbus’ Father: I don’t care what you’ve discovered, Christopher. You could have written. (Top Father’s Day Jokes & Top Father’s Day Quotes)
- Let’s celebrate Columbus Day by walking into someone’s house and telling them we live there now!
- The teacher stood at the front of the room. “Does anybody know what this Monday is?” About half of the students raised their hands. The teacher pointed to one of them. “It’s Columbus Day!” he crowed. The teacher smiled. “It is. Does anybody know why we celebrate it?” This time, only one student raised her hand. “It’s the day the Indians discovered Columbus!” (180 School Jokes)
- How was Columbus’s ship like an avid shopper?… They’re both driven by sales!
October 12th: National Farmer’s Day: School Jokes for National Farmer’s Day
- What is a scarecrow’s favorite fruit?… Straw-berries! (Top Fall Jokes)
- Why shouldn’t you tell a secret on a farm?… Because the potatoes have eyes and the corn has ears! (Top Biology Jokes)
- Why did the scarecrow win the Nobel Prize?… Because he was out standing in his field!
- What new crop did the farmer plant?… Beets me!
- Where do farmers send their kids to grow?… Kinder-garden. (Top Elementary Jokes &180 School Jokes)
October 23rd: Mole Day : School Jokes: Mole Day Jokes for Chemistry Teachers
- What did one mole say to the other?… We make great chemistry together. (Top STEM Jokes)
- Why did Avogadro stop going to a chiropractor on October 24th?… He was only tense to the 23rd! (Top Fall Jokes)
- How much does Avogadro exaggerate?… He makes mountains out of mole hills. (Top Geography Jokes)
- Why is it bad to tell mole jokes?… It’s mole-itically incorrect (Top Election Jokes)
- What did Avogadro get when he mixed ice cream, chocolate syrup, and milk together?… A chocolate Moledt
October 24th: United Nations Day: U.N. Day Jokes
- I Hague to tell you, we do not have too many United Nations Jokes. ((World Geography Jokes & Top Geography Jokes)
- Belize be Mine! (Top Holiday Jokes & Top Valentine’s Day Jokes)
- Come on Russia, you are really Putin me down. (World Geography Jokes)
- Are you from Paris? Because you are driving me in-Seine. (World Geography Jokes)
- This U.N. Resolution is like a donut… There is a big hole in it. (Donut Jokes)
October 26th:National Pumpkin Day Jokes
- What did the pumpkin need for its boo boo?… A pumpkin patch. (Halloween Jokes)
- What did the jack-o’-lantern say to the other jack-o’-lantern when they were on their way to a Halloween party?…”Let’s get glowing.” (Halloween Jokes)
- What is the #1 Halloween band?… Smashing Pumpkins.
- What do you get when you divide the circumference of your jack-o-lantern by its diameter?… Pumpkin Pi. (Top Pi Day Jokes)
- Why didn’t the skeleton want to go to the pumpkin drop?… Because he had no body to go with.(Top Biology Jokes)
October 28th: National Chocolate Day
- What did the M&M go to college? Because he wanted to be a Smarty. (Top College Jokes)
- What do you call a lamb covered in chocolate?…. A Candy Baa
- Why did the Oreo go to the dentist?… Because it lost its filling!
- How many grams of protein are there in that slice of chocolate pie?… 3.14159265. (101 Pi Day Jokes)
- What kind of candy is never on time?… ChocoLATE
- What is an astronauts favorite chocolate?… A Mars bar! (Top Astronomy Jokes)
- What kind of candy bar does an employee crave before the weekend?… A Payday
- What do cannibals eat for dessert?… Chocolate covered aunts.
- What is a monkey’s favorite cookie?… Chocolate chimp!
- What candy is only for girls?… HER-SHEy’s Kisses! (Top Valentine’s Day Jokes)
October 31st: Halloween: School Jokes: Halloween Jokes for Teachers: The nurse walked into the busy doctor’s office and said, “Doctor, the invisible man is here.” The doctor replied, “Sorry, I can’t see him.” (Top Biology Jokes)
- The nurse walked into the busy doctor’s office and said, “Doctor, the invisible man is here.” The doctor replied, “Sorry, I can’t see him.” (Top Biology Jokes)
- Why didn’t Dracula have any friends?…He was a pain in the neck! (Top Biology Jokes)
- What do you call a skeleton that lies on its grave?… Lazy bones! (Top Biology Jokes)
- What did one casket say to the other casket?…”Is that you coffin?” (coughing).
- What kind of streets do zombies live on?… Dead-ends.