Grammar Day Jokes: Grammar Jokes for Teachers

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Top 10 Seasonal Jokes!A GREAT advertising opportunity!

  1. What’s another name for Santa’s elves?… Subordinate Clauses. (Top Christmas Jokes)
  2. What is Black and white and read (red) all over?… A newspaper
  3. What letter of the alphabet has got lots of water?… The “C”
  4. What letter of the alphabet is always waiting in order?… The “Q.” (queue)
  5. What begins with T, ends with T and has T in it?… A teapot.
  6. A word in this sentence is misspelled. What word is it?… Misspelled.
  7. Which letters do Tuesday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday have in common?… None! None of them have “c”, “o”,”m” or “n” in them.
  8. What’s the longest word in the dictionary?… Rubber-band — because it stretches.
  9. One night a man and a woman walked into the bar they left. Who remains?… The night
  10. How do you get ten English teachers to agree on the best teaching method?… Shoot nine of them.
  11. What English Word Begin and End with the same 3 letters?… Underground
  12. What’s an English teacher’s favorite nation?… Expla-nation.
  13. Name a bus you can never enter?… A syllabus
  14. What is the longest word in the English language?… Smiles. (There is a mile between the first letter and the last letter.)
  15. If you leave alphabet soup on the stove and go out, it could spell disaster.
  16. If practice makes perfect, but no one is perfect then why practice?
  17. If the pen is mightier than the sword, then why do actions speak louder than words?
  18. If two wrongs don’t make a right, then why does a double negative make a positive?
  19. It’s good to be awesome, so why is it bad to be aw”ful”?
  20. If Horrible and Horrific are the same things, then why are terrible and terrific opposites?
  21. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… To… To who?… It’s to whom, you illiterate fool.source: http://www.jokes4us.com/miscellaneousjokes/schooljokes/grammarjokes.html

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