World Teachers Day Jokes: Top Jokes for Teachers

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  1. What object is king of the classroom?…. The ruler!
  2. Why are bad school grades like a shipwreck in the Arctic Ocean?… They’re both below C level! (Top Geography Jokes)
  3. What is a math teacher’s favorite sum?… Summer! (Top Math Jokes & Top Summer Jokes)
  4. What is white when dirty and black when clean?…. A blackboard.
  5. What flies around the kindergarten room at night?… The alpha-BAT. (26 Lessons: Letter of the Week & Top Elementary Jokes)
  6. Why is arithmetic hard work?…. All those numerals you have to carry. (Top Math Jokes)
  7. What did the cross eyed teacher say to the principal?…. “I can’t control my pupils!” (Top U.S. Principals)
  8. Why can’t you do a math test in the jungle?…. There are too many cheetahs! (Top Math Jokes)
  9. Why was the voice teacher so good at baseball?…. Because she had the perfect pitch. (Top Baseball Jokes)
  10. Teachers who take class attendance are absent-minded.
  11. Where do New York City kids learn their multiplication tables?… Times Square. (Top States Jokes)
  12. What do you call a boy with a dictionary in his pocket?…. Smartie Pants!
  13. Why did the students study in the aeroplane?… Because they wanted higher grades.
  14. Which building has the most stories?… Library!
  15. Teacher: If I had ten apples in my right hand and nine in my left, what would I have?… Student: Huge hands! (Top Math Jokes)
  16. Teacher: What’s the chemical formula for water? Student: H I J K L M N O. Teacher: What are you talking about? Student: Didn’t you say it’s H to O? (Top Chemistry Jokes & Top Mole Day Jokes)
  17. What did the ghost teacher say to her class?… “Watch the board and I’ll go through it again.” (Top Halloween Jokes)
  18. What’s the worst thing that can happen to a geography teacher?… Getting lost. (Top Geography Jokes)
  19. What do you call a square that’s been in an accident?… A WRECKtangle. (Top Math Jokes)
  20. What tools do you need for math?…. MultiPLIERS. (Top Math Jokes)
  21. Why is it dangerous to do math in the jungle?… Because when you add four and four you get ate (eight). (Top Math Jokes)
  22. When is a blue school book not a blue school book?…. When it is read!
  23. Why did the clock go to the principal’s office?… For tocking too much!
  24. Teacher: Why are you doing your multiplication on the floor? Student: You said we had to do it without tables! (Top Math Jokes)
  25. Why did Jimmy’s grades drop after the holidays?… Because everything was marked down! (Top Christmas Jokes)
  26. What becomes smaller when you turn it upside down?… The number nine. (Top Math Jokes)
  27. Why did the teacher wear sunglasses?…. Because her students were bright!
  28. Teacher: Why are the Middle Ages sometimes called the Dark Ages? Student: Because there were so many knights.
  29. Why was the math book unhappy?…. Because he had too many problems! (Top Math Jokes)
  30. Why are school cafeteria workers cruel?…. Because they batter fish, beat eggs, and whip cream.
  31. How many letters are in the alphabet?… 11, T-H-E A-L-P-H-A-B-E-T. (26 Lessons: Letter of the WeekTop Elementary Jokes)
  32. Teacher: What do you call a fish with no eyes? Student: Fsh
  33. Teacher: You missed school yesterday, didn’t you? Student: Not very much.
  34. Why doesn’t the sun go to college?…. Because it has a million degrees!
  35. Teacher: I wish you’d pay a little attention! David: I’m paying as little as I can, teacher.
  36. Teacher: I hope I didn’t see you looking at Maria’s exam. Student: I sure hope you didn’t, either!
  37. Why did the jellybean go to school?…. To become a smartie!
  38. What do you do if a teacher rolls her eyes at you?…. Pick them up and roll them back to her!
  39. Why did Goofy take a ladder to school?…. Because he wanted to get to high school.
  40. What do ducks use for math?…  A QUACK-ulator !

Check out: Top 20 April  Fool’s Pranks for Families & 365 Jokes: Joke of the Day!

By Subject (487 Jokes)

Chemistry: 140 Mole Jokes: Currently looking for a sponsor.

Math: 101 Pi Day Jokes: Sponsored by IPractice Math.

180 School Jokes: Sponsored by Exam Elf.

Social Studies: 40 Geography Jokes: Currently looking for a sponsor.

Physics: Top 26 Physics Jokes

By Season (71 Jokes)

Top 13 Spring Jokes

Top Summer Jokes

Top Fall Jokes

Top 58 Winter Jokes

Holiday Jokes (666 Jokes)

January 1st: Top 6 New Year’s Day Jokes

February 14th: 101 Valentine’s Day Jokes

February: Top 15 President’s Day Jokes

March 14th: 101 Pi Day Jokes: Sponsored by IPractice Math.

March 17th: Top 44 St. Patrick’s Day Jokes

April 1st: April Fools’ Day Jokes

April 5th, 2015: Top 70 Easter Jokes

Top 8 Mother’s Day Jokes

Top 31 Father’s Day Jokes

Top 40 4th of July Jokes

101 Halloween Jokes

Thanksgiving Day Jokes

140 Christmas Jokes

 

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