Top 40 Valentine’s Day Jokes for Teachers and Families

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My Town Tutors loves a good laugh. Over the years we have acquired many jokes for teachers. Hopefully you find them useful and can have some fun with them.

  1. What did the boy squirrel say to the girl squirrel on Valentine’s Day?… I’m nuts about you!
  2. What did the girl squirrel say to the boy squirrel on Valentine’s Day?… You’re nuts so bad yourself!
  3. What is the difference between a girl who is sick of her boyfriend and a sailor who falls into the ocean?… One is bored over a man the other is a man overboard.
  4. If your aunt ran off to get married, what would you call her?… Antelope.
  5. What did the paper clip say to the magnet?… I find you very attractive.
  6. What did the bat say to his girlfriend?…. You’re fun to hang around with.
  7. What did the elephant say to his girlfriend?… I love you a ton!
  8. What do farmers give their wives on Valentine’s Day?…. Hogs and kisses!
  9. Did you hear about the nearsighted porcupine?… He fell in love with a pin cushion!
  10. What did one pickle say to the other?… You mean a great dill to me.
  11. Do skunks celebrate Valentine’s Day?… Sure, they’re very scent-imental!
  12. Knock, Knock… Who’s there?… Olive… Olive who?… Olive you!
  13. What did the man with the broken leg say to his nurse?… “I’ve got a crutch on you!”
  14. Did you hear about the romance in the tropical fish tank?… It was a case of guppy love.
  15. What do you call two birds in love?…. Tweethearts!
  16. Why do valentines have hearts on them?… Because spleens would look pretty gross!
  17. Why did the kangaroo love the little Australian bear?… Because the bear had many fine koala-ties!
  18. “I can’t be your Valentine for medical reasons.”…“Really?”… “Yeah, you make me sick!”
  19. What did one calculator say to the other?… “How do I love thee? Let me count the ways!”
  20. What did the caveman give his wife on Valentine’s Day?… Ughs and kisses!
  21. What did the boy sheep say to the girl sheep on Valentine’s Day?… I Love Ewe!
  22. What did the girl sheep say back to the boy sheep?… You’re not so baaaa-d yourself!
  23. What did the stamp say to the envelope on Valentine’s Day?… I’m stuck on you!
  24. Knock knock!… Who’s there? Frank… Frank who? Frank you for being my friend!
  25. Knock knock!…Who’s there?… Howard… Howard who?… Howard you like a big kiss?
  26. What do you call a very small Valentine’s?… A Valentiny!
  27. What did the cat say to his Valentine?… You’re purr-fect for me!
  28. What did the octopus say to his Valentine?… I want to hold your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand.
  29. What did the drum say to his Valentine?… My heart beats for you!
  30. What did the owl say to his Valentine?… Owl be yours!
  31. What did the bear say to his Valentine?… I love you beary much!
  32. What did the light bulb say to his Valentine?… I love you watts and watts!
  33. What did the rabbit say to his Valentine?… You’re no bunny ’til some bunny loves you!
  34. What did the train say to his Valentine?… I choo-choo-choose you!
  35. What did the painter say to his Valentine?… I love you with all my art!
  36. What did the chocolate syrup say to the ice cream?… I’m sweet on you!
  37. What did the chef give his wife on Valentine’s Day?… Hugs and quiches.
  38. Why did the cannibal break up with his Valentine?… She didn’t suit his taste!
  39. Why did the banana go out with the prune for Valentine’s Day?… Because he couldn’t get a date.
  40. What do squirrels give each other for Valentine’s Day?… Forget-me-nuts.

 

 

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